


One Plus One Changes Everything

by Kristina67



Series: The Book of Ben [1]
Category: Benedict Cumberbatch - Fandom
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-15
Updated: 2014-08-14
Packaged: 2018-02-08 22:21:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 64
Words: 76,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1958274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kristina67/pseuds/Kristina67
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Benedict discovers that an ordinary housewife can have an extraordinary impact on his life</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Addiction

**Author's Note:**

> This is a story full of fluff, smut and life lessons all rolled into one. Please let me know how you like it. Don't be afraid of the large number of chapters as they are relatively short and I promise they will keep your interest. Thanks for reading

Looking into his eyes I see all the things that have made many women fall in love with him: the eyes that sparkle with both the depth of his soul and the brightness of his personality, the long “horsey face” (as he calls it) which, is strong and authoritative yet kind, the lips that are soft and succulent and that beg to be savored and devoured at the same time. The curly locks which dangle alongside the most magnificent cheek bones god has ever given to a human, the ones every woman wishes she had herself.   
All of these attributes given to one human… it’s just not fair. 

When I look into these eyes I feel the rush of excitement that comes from knowing you are looking at something truly “extraordinary” something that is like Haley’s comet and only comes around once in a lifetime. It’s not just how he looks but it’s how he looks at me. The look that says…you are the only woman for me. I desire you like no other woman in the world. You are special, one of a kind and if I don’t have you I will die. His look penetrates your soul and turns your insides into jelly. No words are needed; his eyes express his words for him. 

If a picture of him can evoke those kinds of emotions, imagine what it would be like to actually see him in the flesh!

So how can I feel this attachment to someone I’ve never met? Thanks to today’s modern technology I have easy access to him 24/7. There are literally thousands of different pictures on the internet, tons of videos and transcripts of interviews he has done. Unfortunately I am not the only one who feels this way about him and fortunately people are good to share with they have online. 

There it is again… that intense feeling. The feeling that my heart is going to jump out of my chest and my stomach is tied into a million knots. The feeling so intense that I don’t know if I can stand it, I don’t know how to deal with it… I’m not sure whether to enjoy it or fear it. I get this feeling after reading his interviews or watching his shows. He causes emotions to swell up inside of me that I have never had before at this intensity. Intense is the only word I know to describe it. It’s like the time I saw Shamu the Whale at Sea World and sat in the “Splash zone”. I thought I would get a bit wet; I didn’t know I would be hit with a tsunami! A tsunami is a good word to describe this feeling as I don’t get any warning its coming, I don’t get time to prepare, its just there and so immense that it washes over my entire being. Sometimes, it leaves me gasping for breath. Other times it leaves me crying, because the emotion is too much to handle. It’s both delightful and frightening at the same time. The only thing I do know is when I get this feeling I have to stop reading or stopping watching. I can’t take in any more of him; he has overloaded my sensory receptors. I am afraid to continue as I don’t know if I will pass out or explode, I only know I am too scared to find out what happens next so I stop for a while until I can regain control of my senses.

I knew I had to do something about this; I had to see if I could connect with this man somehow. The possibility of that happening was next to zero but I never felt more inspired to do something. For the first time in my life, I wanted to write a letter to a man I had never met. This letter had to be special. It had to be amazing enough for him to not only want to read it but also to respond to it. The main goal was to get to meet this man, this man who has turned my life upside down.

I started to write a letter but I wasn’t sure what I wanted to say. I wrote one letter and just when I thought I had it right, I decided I wanted to say something different. I deleted that letter and wrote a different one. I got that one just right and then I decided I didn’t like it and wrote a different one. In all I think I wrote 9 different letters and then I decided to listen to my heart and write the letter saying just exactly what I wanted to say. I decided that I would tell him exactly what it would be like if he and I were together. I wrote the letter from the perspective of what it would be like if I were his girlfriend. What I would do for him and then what I would want from him. I wrote all of the things that I wish I had in my current relationship and what I have learned from past ones. I wrote about all the things I knew were important to him and what is important to me. 

It surprised me how easy it was to write this letter. The words came quickly and sounded good. I had no problem saying what I wanted to say. I guess it was because I knew what I wanted out of a relationship and this time I decided to be myself, not to try to write what I thought he would want to hear but what I wanted to say. I tried to be aloof in tone when I wrote it because I wanted him to feel like I was the woman he should be with; but, that I was someone who wasn’t easy to get; that I was a woman of quality that he needed to win over. 

I printed the letter, addressed the envelope and put it in my purse. I had to sneak it into a mailbox when no one else was watching. I couldn’t put it in the mailbag at work because the girls who handled the mail would see it. I couldn’t put it in an external mailbox when I was with Julien, my husband, because he would want to know what it was. I couldn’t tell him I wrote a fan letter to another man as he would think I had lost my mind, Hell sometimes I think I have lost my mind but yet I don’t want to stop this obsession. So I carried the letter around with me for a week and a half before I got the chance to sneak away by myself and mail it. Once it was in the mailbox, there was no turning back; all I could do was wait.

I’m not sure what I was waiting for as I knew with all the fan mail he gets that my letter would never get to him. But there was always a possibility it would. I felt that if that letter actually made it to him, it would mean something to him as I felt I had tapped into his wants and needs and he would consider me to be the perfect match. If only he got to read it. 

Then I started to think, what if he did read it? What if he did contact me? He wouldn’t be interested in me once he saw me. I am attractive but I am also very overweight. He would take one look at me and that would be the end of that. No if he did contact me, he couldn’t see me, I would have to figure something else. Could I lose the weight this time when I had failed so many times in the past? Perhaps this new motivation would be enough to get me through...just in case.


	2. Not Your Ordinary Fan Letter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben Reads a Fan Letter that stands out from all the rest in more ways then one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The email address used in this Chapter is purely fictional and in no way is connected to the real Benedict Cumberbatch.

That day in London was like any other, the rain was falling, it was cloudy and the fog was coming off the hills. The traffic on the street was moving along at its usual rate when Benedict pulled up to his agency’s office on Convey St. His motorcycle didn’t provide much protection from the rain so he had to cover up with a water repellent rain jacket to stay dry. He should have taken a car instead of the bike, but he loved the freedom of the bike and wanted to enjoy the ride.

Getting off the elevator on the 3rd floor, he walked into the agency and up to the reception desk.   
“Hello Benedict,” the blonde at the reception desk asked. “Karon is waiting for you.”  
“Thanks luv” Benedict replied and walked up the hall to Karon’s office.

Karon was his publicist and was often the person seen with him in photos. If he didn’t have a date to an event she normally went with him. He walked into Karon’s office where there were stacks of fan mail sitting in bags on the floor. “Hey Karon, what’s up today?” he asked.   
“Stacks of mail is what’s up” she said. “Anytime you make a public appearance the mail comes in by the bagful.”  
“Oh good. Well let me have a bag and I will attempt to answer a few of them and pass the rest off to Troy to take care of.”  
“You can use Troy’s office, he’s not in today”  
‘Great, thanks” and Benedict headed into the side office to look at some of his fan mail.

It’s not that he didn’t like or appreciate the mail he received, it’s just that it all seemed the same after a while. There was mail from people who just wanted to compliment him on his acting, which he truly appreciated. There was some mail from people who didn’t really like him, which wasn’t many. There was mail from men who wanted to know what his secret was with women- he couldn’t really answer this one as he hadn’t yet figured it out himself. Mostly though, there was mail from women who told him how sexy he was and how much they wanted to have his babies- these ones kind of spooked him. How would they know he would make a good father… it was just so strange. No matter what the type there was one common denominator, they all wanted something from him. Some wanted pictures, some wanted money, some wanted dates, some wanted tickets to events and some wanted him. So when he opened today’s mailbag, he really didn’t have any idea that there would be one letter that would stand out above the rest.

He picked out a couple of letters from people wanting autographs. They had a stack of his photos in the office so he signed several and put them in stack to be mailed out. He then read a couple from people who wanted information on his next projects. There was press statements prepared that he would use to answer those. This went on for a half hour until he decided to pick one more letter and that was all he would do for today. He fanned out the letters on the floor. He looked them all over and noticed one of them had blue stickers on it. This one caught his attention so he picked it up. The stickers were air mail and he noticed the letter came from Canada. Oh he liked Canada; he was glad he picked this one. He opened the letter; it looked like any ordinary letter, typed out and neat. He started to read it and then started to grin. The letter proceeded to tell him what it would be like if the woman who wrote it was his girlfriend. He was grinning because he thought it was cute and different from the other letters he got. The more he read of it, the more he liked it. If this person would do all the things she said she would do, she would be the perfect woman. She liked books, and his parents and him apparently. She also knew what a man wanted, from sex to time alone without her. She had done her homework because she knew he was usually late and that he struggled sometimes with remembering his lines. The letter then went on to say what she would want from him if he were her boyfriend. This woman was no pushover. She knew what she wanted from him and she knew exactly what to give to him. He had never met any woman who was able to articulate her thoughts in this way. He had talked to brainy women who didn’t know how to treat a man or even want a man in their life. He had talked to women who knew nothing but how to treat a man but that was the extent of their knowledge. To find a woman who seemed to know how to do both was rare.

No this woman was no ordinary woman. This woman had intelligence and class but a naughty side as well. She seemed a little like him really. He had to find out more about her. This was one fan letter he was glad he took the time to read. He put it into his pocket and decided that was enough for today. He would take the letter home and decide what he wanted to do with it.

He made his way out of the office, climbed on his motorbike and headed for home.  
When he got home he headed into his study and opened up his computer. She hadn’t given him a return envelope like a lot of fans did but then she hadn’t asked for anything from him. That was another thing that was different about her, she hadn’t wanted anything. Her letter said she only wanted him to know what type of woman he should be looking for, what kind of relationship he was worthy of. Oh she was good; she got him so intrigued he couldn’t think of anything else.

He searched on his laptop for a Danielle Lapierre in Google. Her name did come up. Apparently she was on Facebook, something he was not. She was very private though as she released very little info to the public. Most Facebook users shared everything, but not her; he liked that. There wasn’t much to see online that he could use. Her address did not appear to be for her home as he couldn’t find it in the phone listings under her name. 

Normally he wouldn’t try this hard to find someone; he didn’t need to as they normally found him. This time it was different. This woman had gotten to him and peaked his curiosity. He wanted/needed to find out more. After looking for 20 mins longer, he decided he would have to write back to her as there didn’t seem to be any other way to reach her. He hadn’t written a letter in a long time so he wasn’t sure where or how to begin. He decided just to write how he felt after reading her letter. After several tries he came up with this:

 

Dear Danielle,

Today when I was reading some of my mail, your letter stood out to me because of the blue stickers on it. I fished it out of the pile and as I started to read it, it stood out to me for more reasons than the envelope it came in. 

I have to be honest and tell you I found your letter amusing and insightful at the same time. It is obvious to me that you are a woman who knows what she wants but also is very gifted in knowing what’s important to a man. I was impressed with the way you expressed yourself as the written word is not often used very eloquent or thought provokingly these days. Your letter was both with a side of naughty thrown in. 

You’ve got me curious now. I would very much like to talk to you and get to know you a bit better. I tried to find you on the internet but you seem to be a private person. This is a plus in my book as privacy is very important to me also, even though I don’t get as much of it as I would like.

I am going to give you my email address so you can write and let me know how I can best reach you. I would like a telephone number, if you wish to share it, as I would like us to converse directly and not through the written or electronic words. Somehow I feel I can trust that you won’t share this email with others and just keep it for your personal use.

Looking forward to talking to you,  
Sincerely,  
Benedict.

Titania76@hotmail.uk

 

There that should do the trick. It was honest and straightforward as she had been. Hopefully she would take him up on his offer and email him back. He didn’t trust this letter to his assistant, for some reason he felt he needed to mail this one himself and he headed off to the postbox.


	3. OMG

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle gets a response she never imagined possible

Man I am so bored at work today. This was normal for me as my job really held no challenges for me anymore. Still it paid the bills and allowed me some flexibility in my schedule so it wasn’t the worst way to earn a living. Mondays were especially torturous however as the weekends were so nice that in comparison Mondays seemed twice as bad.

After checking in with my team and my usual morning coffee, I headed to my mail slot to see if I had mail. I normally don’t have anything but this gave me an excuse to get up and walk around for a bit. I opened the drawer and noticed an envelope inside, probably for someone else I thought. As I fished it out I noticed the postmark and stamp were very different than the ones I normally see. Upon further inspection, I saw it was from England. England? Okay now I was paying attention. The return address said only BC London. OMG was this really from Benedict? It couldn’t be. I took the letter and headed back to my office and I closed the door. The letter was probably just from someone in his office but that still meant someone had read it. I opened the envelope carefully as wanted to make sure I didn’t rip anything that was inside. 

As I began reading it, I realized it was really from Benedict himself. I read it through quickly and then started to reread it to ensure I didn’t miss anything. Wow, it had worked. He found my letter interesting and intriguing the same as I found him. Not only that but he wanted to know more about me. This was more than I could have hoped for. Oh but wait, I was married, I couldn’t actually be his girlfriend. That didn’t mean I couldn’t talk to him and get to know him better. He was in London and I am in Canada after all. It’s not like we would be bumping into each other on the street. What harm would there be in emailing him? I couldn’t see any. I would be honest with him though and let him know I couldn’t be that person for him but that didn’t mean he couldn’t find someone like me to make him happy.

So I went to my computer to write the email I would send to him. 

Hello Benedict,  
How are you? I received your letter and I am happy to hear you actually read the one I sent. With you being so popular, I didn’t expect you would ever even read mine.  
I am glad you found it interesting and intriguing. I have read some of your articles and interviews and find you so refreshingly different than most other celebrities. 

I would be interested in speaking to you. You can call me at 999-999-7777. Just ask for me when you call. 

Until then,  
Danielle

 

I decided to keep it short and sweet. If I told him I was married, he never would call me and I so wanted to hear that deep sensual voice myself. When he calls I will let him know that I am married and tell him that all I can offer is friendship. Then it will be up to him to decide if he wants to call me again. 

For now I think I will keep this letter my little secret. I am not sure how I would explain it to Julien or the kids. Plus it was something just for me and I wanted to keep it to myself, for now anyway.


	4. The Voice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quite night at home soons turns into something much less quiet

It’s a normal Thursday night. Not much going on. The kids are doing homework and Julien is watching TV. Julien is going away on Sat with his brother so I will be alone with the kids. I’m just trying to make sure he has enough clean clothes for the trip.

If I can get one of TJ’s friends to come over on Sat then I can watch some movies I have wanted to see while they play. I havent watched all of Benedicts movies yet because I need to watch them when no one else is around. It’s too hard to explain to Julien why I want to watch his movies. I am afraid I am hurting his ego by making such a large fuss over Benedict. I try not to say Benedict’s name in front of him but man is it hard. I think I am even scaring Alex lately with my obsessive BC (Benedict Cumberbatch) disorder. She’s never seen me like this, but then again, I have never seen me like this.

So as I am sitting there in my room trying to figure out how I am going to manage my time to my advantage, when the phone rings with the ring tone that tells me its long distance. I am sure it is my brother calling to chat but when I look at the call display, it’s an overseas number. “Telemarketers for sure”, I’m thinking, but for some reason I decided to answered it. 

“Hello. Is this the home of Danielle Lapierre?” The voice on the line has deep undertones, and it sounds familiar but I am thrown off by the accent. “Yes it is and this is Danielle. How may I help you?” I respond. 

“I received a letter from you that I found very interesting”, the voice says. My heart was immediately in my chest as I think I have recognized the voice. It takes me what seems like an eternity to speak but somehow I manage to squeak out “Mr Cumberbatch?” I am sure it can’t be him, but it does sound like his voice.   
“Yes my darling it is me” and please let’s not be so formal. There is silence, as I don’t know how to proceed. “Danielle, are you there?” He asks.   
“Yes I am. You have just surprised me and it has taken me a moment to process that it is actually you I am speaking with”.   
“Do you doubt that it is me?” He asks in a show drawn out exciting, intentionally sexy voice.   
“No, actually I don’t. Your voice is so distinct, I can clearly recognize it. I just wasn’t expecting to be sitting home on a Thursday evening and having a chat with Benedict Cumberbatch!” It wasn’t really what I had planned.   
“Disappointed?” he asks in his most playful tone. I know he is again trying to get a rise out of me.   
“Well you did interrupt one of my favorites shows on the telly” I reply back, but if this is the only time that works for you I think I can manage to chat for a few minutes”

He chuckles, loudly into the phone. I can picture the laughter on his face, the crinkles forming around his mouth, the sparkle that can only come from his eyes. “I should have expected a response like that from you”, he says. “Only you would be so unaffected by my call which is why I am calling you.”   
“Do go on” I reply. 

“Your letter was so very different from others I receive that it did stand out to me. You seem genuine and sincere which is hard to find in most people who write to me. Most just want something from me, or feed my ego in hopes that I will do something for them in return. It does get monotonous. You on the other hand, gave me a new perspective on relationships and a few laughs at the same time. You seemed to be able to zero in on the things that I think are important. I don’t know how but you did and that intrigues me.”

“It’s elementary my dear Watson… sorry bad pun!” He groans deeply and then chuckles again. “I did my homework. Don’t worry not in a stalking kind of way, but I was interested in hearing what you had to say. You speak so openly and honestly in your interviews that it is easy for people to feel they know you. What I have always done differently though, is to look for the hidden meaning behind the words. I know what is like to have people make assumptions about you by the way you look or act, and so it’s important to me that I don’t do that to others. I know celebrities get that a lot… but really most of us normal folk do too. I like to think I am a good judge of character and I have spent a lot of my life being an advocate for others either through my job or through my family.” 

“When I read your words it made me reflect on things as they are. Suddenly, even with the fame, and a job I love, I felt you uncovered something that was perhaps missing”. As I heard him utter these words, I knew I had struck a chord with him. I couldn’t believe it but I was actually correct. I had taken only what he gave to everyone and discovered something that only I was able to see. 

“Don’t be too sad about it. Everyone feels like this at one time or another. It’s what you do next that will make the difference. So since you called me, what did you have in mind?” I asked trying to stay casual. I didn’t want to scare him away by being too aggressive. It was like sticking your hand out to a timid deer, you have to let them make the move or else they would run away. I had a feeling from our conversation so far, that I had a chance that this could be more than a one time phone call and I wanted that very much. My heart was in my throat again, waiting for his response. 

“I’m not sure really. I hadn’t really thought that far ahead. I just knew I had to talk to you. Hear what you sound like; see if you are as genuine as you sound in your letter”  
“And, am I?” I asked coyly. Two can play at that game Mr. Cumberbatch!  
“I’m getting a good vibe so far!” He responds, just as coyly.   
“I feel the same,” I reply. Okay, I may be igniting a fire I can’t put out, but I can’t stop now. “Benedict there is something I need to tell you though.”  
“Oh and what is that?” he asked.  
“I didn’t tell you in my letter but I am actually married.” I could hear silence on the other end of the line. “I still mean what I said that you deserve a relationship like the one I wrote to you about. The reason I didn’t tell you before was because I didn’t think you would call me if you knew and I wanted to hear your voice. I hope you don’t think I am leading you on, because I still hope we can be friends. You said yourself I have some kind of insight into who you are, so why not let me help support you as a friend without having the added pressure of a relationship.”

“Wow. Okay. I didn’t see that coming. I have to think about this some more.”   
“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to be dishonest. I just didn’t know how to bring it up. I never expected you to respond to my letter in the first place so I never bothered to mention it then. Do you think we could talk some more and then see what you think?”  
“I’m not looking to break up anyone’s marriage.” He replied.  
“Don’t worry you won’t, not if we are friends. Don’t you have other women friends in your life?”  
‘I do, but your letter certainly had me thinking about more than friendship. Now I would have to change my thoughts. Perhaps we could do this. Tell me about this husband of yours and I’ll see. Let me guess you have children as well?” 

“Yes I do, a son who is 10 and a daughter who is 16. What would you like to know?”

We continued to talk for about a half hour more. I let him ask the questions so he can get comfortable. It’s almost like an informal interview… and interview for a job as a friend! 

Finally he says he has to go. “Despite my disappointment over you being married, I did really enjoy our talk”, he says. .  
“Would you be willing to talk to me again, or to email me?” I ask.

“I think we could do that” he says.  
OMG, did Benedict Cumberbatch just say he would talk to me again? I could be dreaming but it’s such a vivid dream I can’t be sure. If it is a dream, I’m not planning to wake up anytime soon. Yes it would be sinfully delightful to keep this up, but how would I work this into my family without crushing my husband! Not doing it would be easier, but I would miss out on what I feel could be a very exciting experience. 

“Alright then” he said. Let’s see where this friendship takes us. As long as you are being honest with your husband about us then I’m okay with our friendship”  
“Don’t worry I will be honest and let him know. Since it’s only a friendship he shouldn’t have any problems. If he does I will let you know.”  
“Ok, I will let you get back to your telly!” I could hear the smirk in his voice.  
“And you can get back to polishing your cheekbones!” I replied. (This was a well-known comment made by him on in internet). This time I heard his full on laugh as the phone disconnected. I hated to hang up but something told me I didn’t have to worry that this was the last time I would hear his voice.


	5. To be or not to be that is the Question

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle and Julien dont feel the same about Benedicts call

am now grinning from ear to ear like an idiot. My face is flushed and I can hardly breathe. How do I tell my family what just happened? Or do I tell them? I have to tell them as I promised Benedict that I would. How can I explain this ridiculous mood, if I don’t? And what if my husband asks who was on the phone? I’m not very good at lying. I don’t play poker for a reason. 

How could the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me…. outside of my wedding and the birth of my kids, make me feel so guilty and nervous. I should be happy. Well I am happy, extremely happy, but also scared. You know the saying “be careful what you wish for?” Well I think I am starting to realize just what that means. 

The purpose of my letter to Benedict was to illicit the exact thing it did… get him interested in me as potential confidante and friend. Now that he was interested, I was worried this was something I shouldn’t have offered. Did I have a right to offer this to a perfect stranger when I would mean less time for my family and the people I know now?  
Would this potential friendship, cause a problem in my marriage? Would Julien be so jealous that he wouldn’t want me to pursue it?

I had to think this out before I went downstairs to tell them. I had to figure out what I wanted and how it would impact my life. This was no easy thing to jump into. But wait… am I putting the cart before the horse? What are a few calls or emails between people who are literally thousands of miles apart and who live in completely different worlds? It’s not like we were going to be bumping into each other any time soon. If he were ugly, or a girl, this would not be an issue. Why can’t extremely attractive people be good friends? Would it be so wrong? I have been looking for a confidante myself. This could be good for both of us. Instead of seeing a counselor, I could seek advice from a highly sought after movie actor who people describe as “Sex Walking!” What could be wrong with that? 

I think I owe it to myself and to him to try this out and see where it goes. If we can truly be confidantes and friends, it could be the best thing that ever happened to both of us. I would get taste of what the world of celebrity is like which would make my life more exciting, and he would get a friend to whom we can speak freely without wondering about me being jealous or just out to get something from him. Yes I think we need to do this. Now how do I tell my family? 

How does one tell their husband that they have made a new friend who just happens to be one of the sexiest men alive? How do you get him to believe that he has nothing to be worried about and that how you love him will not change just because you have a new male “friend” that every woman would die to talk to? I am going to have to use my best power of influence on this one and I think I will only have one chance. 

If I decided to hide it from him I would feel guilty and I don’t want to feel guilty about something that should make me feel so great. Something that there is nothing to be guilty about shouldn’t need to be hidden. Acting guilty only makes it seem like more than it is. Besides, who knows how long this will actually happen? Maybe I will find out he is a creep and decide not to continue the friendship. Maybe he’ll become bored with me or not have time to bother? 

So I have to tell Julien. I’ll need to tell him alone. I don’t know how he will react so I don’t want the kids to be around. I don’t think I should show him the letter though because I don’t think he would understand me saying what I would do after sleeping with another man. Asking him to understand that would be asking too much. I nonchalantly go downstairs with my heart beating out of my chest. A heart attack at this moment wouldn’t be unexpected. I casually enter the room hoping they can’t hear my heartbeat and trying to look like the most major thing in my life didn’t just happen. 

“Did you notice the call display when the phone range?” I ask innocently.   
“Noticed it was a long number”, he said. “Assumed it was a telemarketer. Why?”   
“Well it wasn’t a telemarketer and you won’t believe me when you I tell you who it was” I’m still trying to play it cool.  
“So who was it? Or do I have to play 20 questions?” he responds. Yes, I’m thinking. Let’s make a game of this. “20 questions actually sounds good.” I reply. “Start asking”.

Now he is looking at me like I had gone off the deep end. In his thoughts he is wondering what the hell I’m doing now. “Seriously?” he asks “Seriously”, I answer.  
“Okay but I think you’ve gone batty”. “Here goes”:

J: It’s someone in one of our families?  
T: Nope  
J: Family Friend?  
T: No  
J: I assume it’s someone we know.   
T: Yes and no. We know who the person is but we havent spoken to them before.  
J: Were they calling from the US?  
T: No (my stomach is getting more in knots with each answer I give)  
J: Were they calling from Canada?  
T: Nope  
J: Good god… where were they calling from and who the heck are they? I can tell he is getting more puzzled by the minute   
T: Keep guessing you should start to get closer now. That’s only 6 questions!   
J: They must be calling from overseas then. From London?  
T: Yes  
J: Who do we know who is travelling in London? He is talking to himself more than me at this point.  
J: Is it someone I would be happy to hear from?  
T: Not sure. Maybe, Maybe not.   
J: I am guessing it’s someone you are glad to hear from.  
T: Yes I think it’s safe to say that.  
J: Okay I think I’ve had enough of this game. The only person I can think of that would call from London and that you would be this happy to hear from would be that Cumberbatch guy but I know it can’t be him so who was it?  
T: You are correct. It was Benedict Cumberbatch  
J: Okay so you are either trying to pull the biggest prank on me ever or you are losing your mind! He is smiling but it’s an odd smile  
T: I’m not kidding. Check the caller ID you can see it’s an overseas call  
J: So suppose I believe you. Why would he ever be calling? He just decided to dial random Canadian households trying to find a fan?  
T: Actually he was phoning in response to a letter I sent him.  
J: What kind of a letter? He is looking kind of annoyed now.   
T: Nothing that bad. Just a letter where I told him I thought he was putting on a show even when he was being himself because no man could be as perfect as he is trying to make us believe he is. I guess I must have hit a nerve because he tracked down our phone number and called. (That sounded plausible right? I didn’t need to go into the details of him writing to me first)  
J: This is getting more unbelievable by the minute. Why didn’t you tell about this letter? It must be someone pulling a prank on you.  
T: Well if it is they went a long way to do it. 1st of all, I didn’t tell anyone I wrote it because I thought people would think I am crazy to bother and I didn’t want you to be concerned for nothing. 2ndly, if it is a prank, they went a long way to pull it off because the phone call definitely came from the UK. And 3rdly, if it wasn’t him, then someone has his distinctive voice down to a science because every word sounded just like him.  
J: So let’s say for even a slight minute that I believe that it was actually him. What did he want?  
T: I wanted to know if I am as sincere as my letter was or if I was just some manipulative fan who found a new way to get to him. We talked for a bit about the letter and why I sent it and then he asked if we could continue to correspond as he found my take on life interesting.  
J: Okay, now I know you are making this up. Some multimillionaire, upper class, extremely famous person who has everything he could ever want, finds you interesting?   
His tone was not very flattering and immediately the hairs on the back of my neck stood out!  
T: Julien Lapierre! I know you don’t find me interesting anymore but you really think it’s that much of a stretch that another man would?! I can’t believe you just said that! I knew that you didn’t express much warmth or appreciation towards me anymore but I didn’t realize you didn’t feel it!   
J: That’s not what I meant…but seriously… what does he see in you?  
T: If you don’t know then I guess we have an issue. Why would you think I wouldn’t be different than a typical fan of his?  
J: Never mind. I don’t want to bother playing your mind games.  
T: Of course anytime we have a chance to talk about anything that means anything to me, you turn off. Typical! Don’t worry about it; I don’t need to explain any further. Benedict and I will continue to email each other or talk on the phone for as long as we both want to. We are only looking to be friends and have discussions that interest both of us. Conversations about things other then what on TV tonight!

With that I stomped away.


	6. Why did I expect anything more from him?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some insight into Danielle's and Julien past

I was always an intellectual. I like debates and discussions and talking about things of interest. We did this all the time in University and over the years I had gotten away from that; probably because Julien was never one to talk about anything. He’s a simple man- not simple as in unintelligent- but simple as in basic. He doesn’t have a lot of needs and isn’t interested in a lot of subjects. He is content to sit around and do nothing. If it wasn’t for me trying to invite people over, we would never have any friends. He himself says all the time he has no friends and yet he seems fine with this. I guess I fell into this rut also. Partially from a financial perspective, going out to do things costs money. But lately I feel like I am suffocating. I can’t stand not doing anything. I can’t stand just sitting and watching TV anymore (unless it’s something with Benedict in it). I crave more excitement, I crave more social interaction, and mostly… I crave more intimacy. 

Don’t misjudge me. I don’t crave sex 24/7 but true intimacy.-holding hands, touching each other in a loving way…kissing! I don’t know the last time Julien initiated a kiss! Do you know what it does to your self-esteem when your husband never kisses you? It doesn’t feel good. I know for a long time I wasn’t interested in sex. I was tried and didn’t feel attractive, but a lot of that had to do with the lack of intimacy. It felt like our sex was robotic, and functional, not loving. It felt like the only reason he wanted to have sex with me was because he couldn’t have sex with anyone else. He would never be unfaithful, so I was his only option. That’s what it felt like to me. I would cry after we had sex because I felt used not loved. 

Now I started to get my energy level back. I am feeling better about myself and I am craving all those things I havent had for so long. So what the problem? Now he doesn’t seem to even want the sex. I would have taken just that but now he’s tired, has too many aches and pains or just doesn’t seem to be able to pull himself away from the TV. Is it any wonder that the thought of another man being interested in my thoughts and opinions is making me extremely happy? Any not just any man, but “THE” man that the world seems to want these days and he wants to spend time with me!

I think the reason why so many adults in their 40s go through midlife crisis is because when you get into your 40s you start to look at your life under a microscope and realize all that is missing. You think about all the things you have put aside to have a career and to raise a family. You miss the “you” from your 20s. Then you thought you were trying to find yourself when in most cases you were the best “you” then because it was all you knew. 

So why was I surprised when he reacted this way? I guess I really wasn’t. I was just hoping I would be wrong (how often do we say that?!). I wanted him to value me more, to surprise me and let me know I hadn’t been forgotten. That I was still worthwhile, intelligent and the person he fell in love with. Now I am questioning why he fell in love with me in the first place? Was it only because I looked pretty good back then and I was interested in him? Did he think I was the only person he could get so he settled for me? I have always bragged about what a good marriage we have. How overall we respect each other, we don’t try to dominate the other person to feel in control and feel better about ourselves. How we support each other’s ambitions and quirks even if we do get annoyed from time to time. Now; however, I am questioning how good our marriage really is.

If our marriage was as good as I was trying to believe it was I wouldn’t be having these thoughts because we wouldn’t have let it get to this place. I would have felt comfortable talking to him about how I felt and he would want to talk to me too. I wouldn’t feel this much excitement towards another man because I would be getting what I need from my husband. I am sure I have let him down as well, because I know I’m not perfect, but he will never tell me what’s annoying him until it gets too late and then he explodes with unnecessary anger in inappropriate situations. Then we get into a huge fight and then we talk. We don’t really resolve anything though because we keep repeating the same cycle. I am sure this is the same dance many married couples do. I just thought somehow my marriage would be different. Hoped it would be.

As usual, we didn’t really talk much about that fight (why change what is so clearly working?!). He still didn’t understand why Benedict would want to talk to me. I told him, he just felt comfortable talking to someone who was not involved in his life, someone who would give him their honest opinion. Julien knows I’m nothing but honest so this seemed to quiet him for the time being. Again, nothing important was said or resolved, just enough so we could move on with our lives.

I was surprised how soon after our call that Benedict emailed me for the first time. It was only about 2 days later when his email arrived.


	7. Emails

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle and Benedict start to open up to each other through emails.

It was not very long before I got the first email from him. It was pretty short and sweet:

Hello Darling, it’s me Benedict. How are things in Canada today?  
I’m in Los Angeles right now as you may know since the whole world seems to know my every move. Los Angeles is nice, the parties are fun and I am such a fanboy of some of the celebrities I am getting to rub elbows with. I got to talk to Tom Hanks this week while on a press junket. He is such a nice man, and I was shocked that he was a fan of Sherlock! Seems our boy SH is getting a wide audience these days.

I miss home and can’t wait to get back.   
Let me know what’s going on in the real world will you? I need to hear some normal for a change.

Looking forward to our next talk.  
B

It actually happened; Benedict Cumberbatch emailed me and wanted to know how I was. I don’t want to reply back too quickly as I don’t want to appear too eager. Have to think about what I wanted to say as I have to keep being “charming”. This is too important to mess up.

Hello Benedict,  
Nice to hear from you. Canada is freaking cold today. If it gets any colder my hands are going to freeze together. I am sure Los Angeles is beautiful right now. I’ll have to keep thinking of all the sunshine you have in order to stay warm. 

Yes I did know you were in LA and yes there isn’t much that isn’t reported about you. Even saw that you took in a movie the other night. How did you enjoy WOWS? The disguise wasn’t bad but I guess not quite good enough. You are going to have to start dressing like Hugh Laurie did in Forty Something and put on a berka just so you can have some privacy. That’s one good thing about where I live, no one expects to see celebrities so you could go incognito easily here. Now would be a good time, as you would need so many layers of clothing to keep warm, no one would be able to recognize you!

The real world? Let me see, my boss is an ass, so work is a lot of fun these days. My daughter brought home the best report card; she made the honor roll so that was exciting I guess. My son is home sick with a cold. He looks so small and helpless when he’s sick…it just pulls at my heart. 

So when you aren’t out and about with the paparazzi on your tail, what do you do for fun? What kind of things float through your mind when you are alone in your hotel room? Or perhaps you aren’t alone? I am sure there are no lack of women who would love to keep you company.  
I am really glad to hear from you. Call or email anytime and if I’m not frozen, I’ll be glad to chat.  
D

There, it’s done. Let’s see what response I get. This is like dating without the romantic connection. It’s the getting to know you stage of a relationship and that’s the exciting phase. A little scary too because you never know how the other person will take what you have to say because they don’t know you well enough yet.  
About 5mins after I finished my email, my computer went ping. It was Benedict again!

Hi, me again. Can I call you? I need a human voice. B

I replied back quickly before he found something else to do. 

Sure. Give me a call at home.  
D

Ring!Ring! “I’ll get it” I holler.

“Hello”  
“Hello Danielle. How are you?”  
‘I’m good Benedict. You are lonely are you?”  
“Yes I am. I hate travelling by myself. When the work is done and the crowds leave there is only the sound of my own voice and I’m getting a little tired of hearing my own voice. Do you ever get like that?”  
“Yes I do but normally it’s because I’m telling the kids or my husband something and no one is listening. I hate talking just to talk!”  
“Haha! I guess that could happen that way too.”

“You do sound a bit sad. Is there something else on your mind?” I asked.  
“Nothing I should bother you about, you have more important things to deal with”  
“Don’t be like that. The whole reason I wanted to have this relationship or whatever you want to call it, is so we both could be honest and have someone to talk openly to.”

“You’re right. Okay. Well I’m a little down because they cut one of my scenes from the movie I’m doing. While it wasn’t a hugely important scene, it was difficult to do and I put a lot of work into getting it right just to have them not use it. See I told you it wasn’t a very big problem.”  
“Oh Benedict I’m sorry. I am sure there must have been a good reason for it and I’m sure it has nothing to do with how well you did the scene. Or maybe the director will realize he made a bad choice and put it back in as people change their minds all the time. Don’t think of it as a waste of your time, think of it as practice for the next time you need to do a scene similar to that. And it doesn’t matter about the size of the problem.”  
“You’re right. I didn’t think of the benefit of practice.”  
“Besides, I am sure you get paid the same whether that scene is in there or not right?”  
“Right again. Okay, I’m starting to feel better about it now. Thank you.”  
“You don’t need to thank me, I enjoy listening. Just so it isn’t such a big loss to you, is there any way you can get a copy of the footage to keep?   
“I probably could.”  
“I’m just thinking if it was that hard of a scene to do, then you might need that inspiration for other roles.”  
“Hmm… never thought of that but it might come in handy later on. Smart cookie aren’t you?” he teased.  
“I have my moments” I answered back.

“So what else is going on?” I asked. “Tell me all about Los Angeles. Make me even more jealous then I already am.”   
“Well I did take a nice drive down the highway after work. The sun shining on the water was very pretty.”  
“You’ll have to keep a camera with you and take some pictures for me” I said  
“Okay I will. Maybe sometime I can bring you here to see it for yourself”  
“We’ll see. I’ve got a family to work around remember?”  
“Don’t worry I won’t forget.”   
“So how does this family life thing work?” he asked. “I’ve been by myself for a couple of years and before that it was only me and Olivia. I can’t imagine what it must be like to have children to take care of.”  
“I won’t lie to you; the first few years are rough because it’s all an adjustment. I found it hard when they were really little because they can’t communicate and so you are only guessing as to what they want and need and sometimes you can’t figure it out and they cry all the time.”  
“That must be hard”   
“I describe having kids as doubling your emotions. Everything good makes you twice as happy and everything bad makes you twice as sad. You are feeling for two!”  
“I never thought of it that way but it makes sense. As much as I know it would be hard, I really do want children someday.”  
“I’m sure you’ll get them…when the time is right.”  
“I hope. Anyway it must be late where you are, I better let you go”   
“Yes I may drift off to sleep any minute now. I enjoyed talking to you though.”  
“Me too” he replied. “Sweet dreams”  
“You too” and with that I hung up. I would be having sweet dreams now as I think of our conversation.

I woke up the next morning full of energy. I hadn’t felt like that for a while. I started to think about it and I realized I had been feeling better about myself and life lately. I guess this friendship with Benedict was good for the ego. Since I was in a good mood I decided to push my luck and step on the bathroom scales to see how my weight was. WOW! I lost 30 pounds! I couldn’t believe it. I stepped on again as I thought it had to be a mistake. Nope it was right. Come to think of it, I hadn’t been thinking about food much the last couple of months. I was too busy thinking about Benedict. I had been reading articles and watching his movies and I wasn’t thinking about eating. Not only was Benedict good for the soul, he was a good weight loss tool. 

This new revelation gave me an idea. Why not really try to lose the weight since it seemed to be easier than usual. I had wanted to get healthier for a while but I had never been able to stick with any diet plan long enough to make any real difference. I decided right then that since I liked watching Benedict’s movies and video clips that why not get on the treadmill and walk while watching them. This way I wouldn’t be bored on the treadmill like I usually was. 

So the next morning I got up early and headed downstairs to the treadmill. I turned on the iPad and watched a couple of videos made by Benedict’s fans. They were pretty good and were set to good music so they were easy to move to. The next thing I knew 10 minutes had passed without me even noticing it. I went 5 more minutes and then stopped. That had been easy, I could do that once or twice a day. So I decided then to make this my mission. It was time to turn a new leaf. I had done so in other areas of my life it was time to turn this corner as well.


	8. Rainy Day Sundays

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The friendship between Ben and Danielle grows during a rainy Sunday phone call.

Over the next 4 months, Benedict called and emailed often. Whenever he went on location, or returned home he would call. Just before he went for an audition, he would call. Just after his audition he would text and let me know how it went. Most of the time, he was just lonely and wanted someone to talk to. He wanted someone to share his highs and lows with and I was interested in everything he had to say. Hearing all about show business and what his typical days were like was very interesting and knowing there would be something new to hear about at the end of my day gave me something to look forward to. The friendship worked for both of us.

It was working for my waistline as well. I went on to lose 60 more pounds. I was well on the way to getting where I wanted. I hadn’t told Benedict about my weight problem to begin with so I couldn’t tell him now about losing the weight. When I got down to where I wanted to be I would tell him then. Perhaps then I would be willing to Skype with him.

When there was down time in his schedule, Benedict would text me to see what I was up to. When he was in his hotel at night he would ask me about my days, what the kids were like and what they liked to do. He was very interested in their lives. He asked lots of questions about me and what I was interested in. He wanted to know all about my life. The only thing he didn’t ask much about was my relationship with Julien. After we got to know each other better he did ask about him a bit.

“So tell me about how you and Julien met. What attracted you to him?” Benedict asked.  
“We met at work, he was my customer. He was a nice guy who came in often and chatted and all of a sudden one day I noticed he had a cute ass.”  
He laughed when I said this. “Well you asked me what I was attracted to.” I replied.  
“Yes I guess I did. Continue”  
“Well we were both young and going to the clubs every weekend. We ended up at the same clubs and eventually he asked me to dance and that’s how it all began.”  
“How did you know he was the one?”  
“I didn’t at first, I just knew he was kind and sweet and he was interested in me. He wasn’t out to just get into my pants”  
“A real gentleman was he?” he teased.  
“Yes he was and that was rare for guys back then. I wasn’t sure for a long time that he was the one because I had been hurt several times before. I wasn’t looking for a long term relationship because I didn’t think it was possible. When he started to get serious about me, I wasn’t that serious about him. Finally one day I decided that while I wasn’t imagining the rest of my life with him, I didn’t want to see it without him. We wanted the same things out of life. So when he proposed I was ready to say yes.”  
“Interesting.”  
“Why do you say that?”  
“Most women talk about falling in love by saying the person completed them and it was like a fairy tale and they couldn’t breathe without them. You on the other hand describe your romance so rationally. It’s just different I guess,”  
“Well I guess that just me; I’m not all flowers and hearts. Don’t get me wrong, I love romance as much as the next girl, but to me how the person makes me feel is more important than buying me gifts but not treating me well.”  
“That’s true. I just never heard a woman talk so frankly about love before. All the women I have talked to, all talk about the magic and the heart pounding feeling she gets.”  
“I am probably more rational then I should be but the times before when I was less rational, are the times when I have gotten hurt because that’s all it was, smoke and mirrors and not true love.”  
“That’s too bad, perhaps one day you will be able to feel both” he seemed very sincere when he said this.   
“Perhaps”

On another occasion I got brave and I asked him about Olivia.  
“What was your relationship with her like? Why did you stay together 12 years and never get married and then break up?” I was so curious.  
“Olivia and I were young when we met. We were in college finishing our degrees and we just seemed to be a lot alike. We hung out a lot together and eventually we started to date. We were very comfortable. We had fun but more than anything we were good support for each other. We were both in the business so we knew what each other was facing. We could give each other advice. We had a good relationship and saw no reason to change anything. I had wanted to get married and have a family but she wanted to work on her career. So we stayed the way things were because it made her happy. While I was less happy, I was concentrating on my career so I was able to tell myself it didn’t matter. One day I looked at her and asked her what she saw as our future. She didn’t know, but she wasn’t sure she would ever want kids or ever get married. She came from a divorced family and didn’t want to go through what her parents had.

“That must have been hard for you. Your Mom and Dad seem like they have a good marriage.”  
“Yes they do and I had hoped Olivia and I would have the same thing. It was hard and I guess it was then that I decided I needed either more or less. Since she didn’t ever see herself wanting more, I decided I needed less. I would never find the right person for me if we stayed together so we ended things.   
“Still it must have been really hard being without her those first few months. She was a part of you for 12 years. It must have been like losing a body part.”  
“It was. But eventually I was able to move on and so did she. We are still friendly but we don’t talk often.”  
“Well, I guess her loss is my gain. If she were still a part of your life then you wouldn’t have needed me” I said trying to lighten the mood a bit.  
“Oh I think I still would have needed you, but I wouldn’t have known it as I wouldn’t have been looking for you,” he replied.

We really shared a lot during our calls. Our friendship was getting stronger with each interaction. The things I shared with him would normally be things I would share with a girlfriend but I didn’t have a close girlfriend that I was comfortable confiding in and Julien wasn’t interested in talking about anything personal. TV, cars and the house was all he was interested in talking about.

I believe it was the same for Benedict. He would normally be sharing these feelings with a girlfriend but he didn’t have time for one. With me, he could call when he needed to and I didn’t need him to want anything more. It was perfect.

So we continued to chat and to support each other in any way we could. Several times he asked about using Skype but I told him I would rather not. Our relationship was built on emotional connection and support, looks and attraction had no place in that. Beside Julien was not crazy about me talking with another man, but it was easier for him to put up with knowing Benedict didn’t even know what I looked like. 

One particularly rainy, boring Sunday, when the sky looked gray all day, Julien decided to settle in and watch one of his drama series, the kids had gone to play with friends, and I was puttering around doing housework when the phone rang. It was Benedict. He didn’t usually call on Sundays as normally we were both too busy to talk. 

“Hello Benedict” I said as I picked up the phone.  
“Hello Luv” he answered back. “Surprised to hear from me today?”  
“Yes I am, you don’t normally call on Sundays”  
“Today just seems to be one of those dreary days where no one wants to get out of bed. I have no plans for the day, and no interest in making any.”  
“That’s funny because the weather is like that here too. I was just trying to find something to do or else I was going to crawl back in bed and go back to sleep.”  
“Well how about a chat then? I’m still in bed, why don’t you crawl back in and get comfy and talk to me a while?”  
“Sure okay.” I knew Julien wouldn’t be looking for me so why not.  
“Okay, let me know when you are snuggled in” he said

So I made my way back into my bedroom and climbed in under the covers. It was warm and so inviting, I knew this was a great idea for a dreary day.

“Okay, I’m all tucked in under my comfy duvet” I said.  
“I am guessing it is white and fluffy” he said.  
“Yes it is, why would you guess that?”  
“I just envision you like an angel in the middle of clouds”  
“Well it does look like clouds, but I don’t think I would ever be mistaken for an angel” I laughed.  
“A bit of a bad girl are we?”  
“Not really but sometimes I can be opinionated and rub people the wrong way. Plus I am a bit of an atheist. I believe in some sort of higher power, but I think modern religion is geared towards how to benefit itself and not the people who are devoted to it. I keep joking that one of these days I will be struck down by lightening for some of the things I say, but it hasn’t happened yet.”  
“Well at least you are honest. There is nothing worse than people who say they are devote church goers but then lie and cheat and steal and think going to church will make it okay.”  
“Agreed. Ok enough about religion.” What are you snuggled into?”  
“I also love a duvet but mine is red. I love the richness of red”  
“I can picture that, you all snuggled in like royalty!”  
“Well I am the king of my castle; I would have to be since it’s just me” he chuckled.

So we chatted about some silly stuff for a while, nothing too important. He was so easy to talk to that we didn’t even notice the time flying by. 

“Tell me what you were like as a child.” He asked.  
“Well, there isn’t too much to tell. I was a boring kid. My father dominated our house and my mother for as long as I can remember, and they fought a lot. So in order to avoid the fighting, I learned from an early age that if I stayed out of trouble there was less for them to argue about. School came easy for me; I was able to get good grades and was usually the top one in my class. My school was a little country school though so there wasn’t a whole lot of competition. I was polite and enjoyed helping others so the teachers loved me. As I got older, I withdrew socially. I had lots of friends but I never went to parties because I was afraid I would get myself into trouble and it wouldn’t be worth the trouble it would bring into the house. It wasn’t until I went off the university that I started living for myself. “ .  
“Sounds like it was rough for you. I wish I had known you then, I would have pulled you out of that shell.”  
“I’m sure you would have but I bet you wouldn’t have taken a second look at me. Guys liked being my friend because I was smart and easy to talk to, but they never wanted anything more from me. I was a geek and not the beauty queen they were all attracted to. It wasn’t until I got a lot older that I realized I wasn’t as ugly as I thought I was. By then it was too late, I had missed out on too much.” I didn’t tell him that I filled myself with food because I didn’t feel worthy of love. That was too painful for me to share with anyone.  
“Ah my love, it’s never too late to realize true beauty. You have such a kind soul. I have never met anyone like you before and if the young men missed out on that then I guess Julien was the one who benefitted from it.  
“You always know just what to say, don’t you?” “So tell me more about you as a kid. I only know what I have read online.”  
“Well you know most of it then. I was your typical rambunctious young lad, getting into trouble whenever I could. Constantly buzzing from one thing to another. I am sure I probably was ADHD or something but back then it wasn’t the “in” thing it is now. I was sent to boarding school where I grew up with all boys. I was teased and tormented over my looks, quite different from the attention I am getting today. I tried hard to get good grades but my mind was always elsewhere. It’s probably good that there were no girls in our school but I would have concentrated even less if that was possible. As you know I found acting and that changed my life. I found something that I was good at and it make me happy to transform myself into these characters and away from whom I really was. I never had trouble with Mom and Dad, probably because I was an only child; they just put up with me and spoiled me rotten. I am sure that’s why I can be a bit fussy now because I was allowed to be then.”  
“Funny you should mention that because I am completely the opposite, I am not the least bit fussy and it’s probably because I learned early on that if it wasn’t terribly important, it wasn’t worth mentioning. That and my parents wouldn’t put up with being fussy.”   
“That’s exactly it. Tell me about your brother. I only have one much older step sister so we didn’t have a normal sibling relationship. What is he like?”  
“Well when we were younger, he was a pain in my butt!” I chuckled. ‘He was four years younger than me and so he was always tagging along behind me when I didn’t want him to, getting into trouble and getting me into trouble. I am thinking he may have been a little like you. When we got older we grew closer. I wanted to be the cool big sister and give him his first drink, but unlike me, he wasn’t afraid of getting in trouble so he had a drink long before I knew it. We worked together for a while and it’s because of him that I got to visit the UK. He was working for a company in the UK and was only supposed to be there for 6 months. He ended up living there for 5 years. Julien and I, and my Mom flew to London to visit with him. Then we all went back to London for a couple of days and then to Rome. I loved London, the history, the royalty, the whole cultural experience. I have to say though, that I loved Rome even more. I fell in love with the architecture and the relaxed atmosphere of the city. The men were pretty nice to look at too!”  
“You didn’t find any nice looking men in London?’ he teased.  
“Not as many but I obviously was looking in the wrong place as I missed the whole lot of you young British actors. Where we you all hiding then?”  
“Guess we were all working hard and not just hanging out on the streets” he said  
“Too bad. I would have enjoyed that view” I teased. “Anyway, back to my brother. He and I pretty close because growing up it was the two of us trying to survive Mom and Dad’s rocky marriage. I thought I had broken the cycle of bad marriages when Julien and I got married but my brother was doomed to one himself. He was alone for a long time and when he got married he rushed into it. They ended up divorced after 3 long years together. I felt bad for him that his marriage was over but happy because I knew he could never be happy with her. Now he is on his own, running his own company and probably happier then he has ever been”  
“That’s good, that he can be happy now”  
“Yes it is”   
“What about your Mom and Dad? As actors, was it difficult for them to raise you with that kind of a lifestyle?” I asked  
“Not really because things were very different back then. The acting they did was all close to home. They didn’t fly back and forth to America as I do now. It was much easier to raise a family. Also since I was at boarding school from the age of 8, they had freedom to work.”  
“Do you ever resent them sending you away to boarding school instead of keeping you at home with them?”  
“I did at first because I didn’t understand why they wouldn’t want me to stay with them. At 8 all you know is your family and all I knew was I wasn’t going to be living with them for most of the year. I was going to be with strangers.”  
“That must have been so hard. I can’t imagine how your mother did it. I think of TJ and how he’s 10 now and I still couldn’t do it. He’s my baby and as much as some times I wish I had a little more freedom, I would worry and miss him too much. Even Alex is 16 now and I am dreading her going off to college in only 2 years.”  
“Our generation is different though. Women have careers and kids. Our mothers generation usually did one or the other but not both. My Mom wanted both so back then this was the answer. And of course the British culture is much different. We don’t normally bond with our parents in the same way you Yanks do.”  
“Hey go easy on that Yank stuff. That’s what we call Americans” He chuckled.

“I knew my parents were sending me to a very good school and that they sacrificed a lot in order to send me. So to me they were doing something special for me. Still there were a lot of lonely nights. Nights I was scared to be there, nights I wanted nothing more than to be with my Mom or have Dad reading to me at bedtime.”  
“I feel so bad for you. I wish I knew you then.”  
“Well at that time I didn’t want anything to do with girls so I probably wouldn’t have liked you” he teased.  
“I suppose. I probably would have thought you were a bratty little kid then” I teased back.  
“Wow…do you see what time it is? We have been talking for 2 hours!” I just happened to notice the clock. I was surprised Julien didn’t come looking for me.  
“I guess we got lost in our conversation. It’s so easy to talk to you” he said  
“It’s easy to talk to you to. I probably should go now though. As much as I am enjoying our conversation, I do have a husband here probably wondering what I am doing. He’s been pretty good about our relationship but I don’t want to push my luck.”  
“True. I keep forgetting you have a life away from me”  
“Enjoy the rest of your rainy day” I said  
“You too my love”


	9. The Invitation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After some good news Benedict surprises Danielle

That rainy day conversation was a turning point in our relationship. Our conversations got more personal. We now had shared things about ourselves that brought us to a more intimate level. I knew things about him that I couldn’t get from the internet and he knew things about me that I hadn’t ever shared with even my husband. It was so much easier to talk to him because he was far away, and while his opinion did matter, I wasn’t afraid he was going to judge me. He had no vested interest in my decisions; they wouldn’t affect his life so he could be nonjudgmental.

From then on Benedict called me before he made any big decision. It wasn’t so I could make the decision for him but so I could listen and hear what he was really saying and help him identify what he really wanted. I on the other hand would call him whenever I needed a lift from being a mom and wife, when I wanted to be valued for being me and sometimes just to hear about all the fantastic things he was getting the chance to do. I was living vicariously through him. 

This was such a mood lifter for me that I continued to exercise and I continued to lose the weight. I was down 130 pounds total now. I was a different person inside and out. People were amazed at the change in me. Julien was amazed as well. I don’t think it made him happier though as he struggled with his own weight. As I got thinner he stayed the same or went up. I tried to help him too but he wasn’t interested. Plus I couldn’t tell him my real motivation was another man! So I kept talking to Benedict and the weight kept coming off.

This day was a big day for Benedict. He was having a meeting with JJ to talk about Star Wars. He wasn’t supposed to tell anyone about it, only his agent was supposed to know, but he told me. He trusted me to keep the secret but also he needed to share this with someone. So when the phone rang that evening I wasn’t surprised. 

“Hello Luv” he said as I answered the phone. “How are you?”  
“I’m great but more importantly, how are you? How did your meeting with JJ go?  
“It was good. Things aren’t finalized yet, but he does have a part for me in the new Star Wars.”  
“Oh my god that’s fantastic! That’s just what you’ve wanted!”  
“Yes I am very pleased”  
‘Okay my prime and proper British man let loose and show some excitement!”  
“Fucking Amazing! Is that better?” He laughed.  
“Yes it is” I said laughing at the same time.  
“So since I am on a winning streak, I’m going to push my luck and ask you something”  
“Okay, what is it?”  
“I really enjoy and value our friendship. It is killing me that I have never gotten to see what you look like.” He paused.  
I thought he was going to ask me if we could finally Skype but what he asked was much more.  
“I was hoping you would come visit me in London”. Wow I wasn’t expecting that.

“Now before you answer let me explain further” he said. “I would like to invite you and Julien, Alex and TJ to fly to London for a visit and stay as my guests at my house. I have a couple of weeks off between jobs and I would like to spend that time with all of you.”

“Benedict” I paused, “I would love to. I am sure my family would love to!”  
I heard what sounded like a sigh of relief on the other end of the line.   
“Oh I am so glad you said yes. I was nervous you would turn me down.”  
“Why would you think that? I have wanted to meet you as much as you have wanted to meet me. I know what you look like but seeing you on TV and seeing you in person is a lot different. Besides what if you are disappointed when you meet me? I’m not the glamorous type.”  
“I would never be disappointed in you!” he said. “Even if you look like Mrs. Hudson, I would adore you for who you are and what you mean to me.”  
“And that’s why I adore you!” I said. “Let me know what dates you are thinking and I will check with Julien and also check to make sure we can get the time off of work. I’ll have to check for flights too.”  
“Find out about work but don’t worry about flights, I’ll have my assistant make all the arrangements for you. You are my guests so I’m going to arrange everything. If that’s okay?” he said this like an afterthought in case I didn’t want him to.  
“Benedict I don’t want you spending all your money on us. I don’t expect you to”  
“Nonsense. I am fortunate enough to be able to afford to and it means a lot to me to be able to do this so please let me.”  
“Only if you are sure. I don’t want you thinking I’m only in this relationship for what I can get from you”  
“Don’t be silly. If that’s what I thought I would ended out conversations months ago.”  
“Okay, so let me know the dates and I’ll get things going on our end. I’m so excited now. I love London and I can’t wait to see you!  
“Ok Luv. Talk to you soon”  
“Bye”

Wow! What a surprise. I couldn’t have asked for anything better. I was going to be able to take the kids to London which I have always wanted to do and we would get to meet one of the most sought after actors in the world and one of my best friends. Not just meet him but stay at his house! I must be dreaming, this type of thing doesn’t happen to people like me. 

Okay, now I am wondering what Julien will say? Surely he will think this is a great opportunity as well. No sense waiting to find out. Might as well bite the bullet now and tell him.

So I went downstairs where he was watching TV.  
“So if someone offered us an all-expense paid trip for 4 with no strings attached, would you be interested in taking them up on it?”  
“If there definitely are no strings and we could get time off work? Absolutely. Where are we going?” he was laughing because he thought I was kidding.  
“London.”  
“London, why? And who is offering this?” he stopped laughing.  
“Benedict has offered to fly us all over to London to meet him and be his guests at his home for a week.”  
“And why would he want to do that? Sounds like there may be some strings” he said frowning.   
“No strings! He and I have become good friends and he doesn’t even know what I look like. I have told him all about you guys and since he has some time off he wants to fly us over to meet him. He really is a nice guy. I know you would like him and when else could we get to bring the kids to London and not have to pay for it?”  
“Well I guess it would be a nice trip, and I would love to go back and take the kids. Since I would be there I’m sure Mr. Sexy won’t be putting any moves on you.”  
“Even if you weren’t there he wouldn’t. I told you our relationship is not like that!”  
“I know it may not be now, but he’s a movie star and they all think they can get whatever they want and what’s to stop him from wanting you?”  
“Well as you said before, I’m nothing special so why should he want me?!” I was getting angry. First he puts me down by not understanding why any man would be interested in talking to me and then he says he doesn’t trust me.  
“That’s not what I meant. Why do you always twist me words?”  
“Why do you always put your foot in your mouth?” I walked away. I was getting tired of this attitude of his. I have tried hard for a long time to make things better at home and work on myself to be happier and all he does is make wise cracks and complain. I am going to London and the kids are going to London and he can decide what he wants to do. I’m not letting him ruin this for us.


	10. Saying Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for Danielle to travel to London

I couldn’t believe the day had come for us to go to London and to meet Benedict face to face for the first time. I was soooo nervous I couldn’t stand it. What if he was repulsed by the way I looked? What if he changed his mind once he met me and decided not to spend time with us? What if I say something to offend him or act unrefined? Every horrible thought I could ever think passed through my mind that day but luckily those thoughts couldn’t stick around long because I had to get 2 children and myself through all the security and customs checks and on and off a transatlantic flight by myself. Yes by myself. Julien had gotten over his hissy fit and had decided to go with us but at the last minute, he got sick and couldn’t go. He did tell me to go with the kids because he finally realized it would be very selfish of him not to want us to go.

I was also nervous to premier my new look. I had been able to reach my goal weight and I was down the whole 150 lbs. It was odd; I wasn’t used to being this small. I still felt like I was large. I am so glad I waited until now to see Benedict as I would not have been able to face him at the weight I was at before.

Alex was almost as nervous as I was because she knew what a big thing this was that we were doing. She knew the magnitude of the star we were going to meet and how extraordinary it was that we had been asked to do this. TJ on the other hand was cool as a cucumber. He was excited to be back on a plane but he didn’t really know how far away we were going, how special this trip was and how amazing it was that we were going to hang out with a major movie star! Sometimes ignorance is bliss.

Before leaving for the airport, I went in to see Julien to say goodbye. He was looking very sad, sad like his dog just died, sad like he lost his best friend. His eyes looked red, like he was on the verge of tears. He is not someone who cries easily and I was very shocked to see him like this. Then it hit me…he was scared, scared of losing us. He didn’t know what would happen when we met this “other man”. Would we be taken in by the glitz and glamour of the “Movie Star” and the attraction of London itself? Now that I was a new woman, perhaps he was afraid of the attention I might get.

“So you are ready to go?” he asks, his voice barely audible.   
“Yes, I guess so. Are you going to be okay? Is there anything else you need before we go? I was starting to feel guilty about leaving him, especially when he was sick.   
“No, I’ll be fine. I just need to rest”  
“I feel bad leaving you all alone and going on this great trip without you. I really wish you were coming!”  
“Yes me too, but there isn’t much I can do about it. Go and enjoy yourselves, just don’t forget that I’m here waiting for you”. His eyes took on a serious look, like he was begging me not to do anything to jeopardize our marriage. To make sure I was going to come back to him.   
My eyes started to well up too, knowing he was this vulnerable. “Don’t worry”, I tried to smile like I was making a joke. “We’ll be back and then you’ll miss the peace and quiet!”  
I bent down and kissed him on the lips. A slow kiss, full of emotion, one that was saying all the things we couldn’t say. The first real kiss we had in a year or more.  
I turned and walked away trying to keep my composure so the kids didn’t know what a big step this was that we were about to take, a step that could change all of our lives.


	11. The Visit to London- A.K.A the Moment of Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arriving in London, Danielle and the kids meet one of Benedict staff at the airport

Boarding the plane, we felt like movie stars ourselves. Benedict had arranged everything and we were comfortably sitting in the First Class section of the plane. Flying first class was an item from my bucket list that I could now cross off, and it was everything I had hoped it would be. Alex was afraid the others in First Class would think we were frauds and we didn’t belong there with them. I reminded her that we were just as important as anyone else on the plane and Benedict Cumberbatch had arranged this for us! Who knew when we started talking 7 months ago that we would be on a plane heading to meet him? An even bigger question was who knew he would take an interest in my letter and reach out to me in the first place? 

TJ, being his usual charming self, had the flight attendants wrapped around his little finger. In a way he was a mini version of Benedict, he knew how to make woman adore him with his innocent charm and undeniable cuteness. By the end of the flight he knew them all and they stopped by regularly to chat with him.

While I did feel special and excited, I also felt those nervous feelings creeping back into my stomach. We were on our way; this was actually going to happen. My thoughts kept racing back and forth between what it would be like when we landed and about Julien at home and what this trip could mean to our marriage. I wasn’t going to London to have an affair, that wasn’t my goal. I was a faithful wife, I loved my husband and even though there were things missing from my marriage, I had no desire to see it end. 

So what did I want from this trip? I wanted to get to know the man I had only talked and written to. I wanted to meet his family, meet his friends, and see him at work. I wanted to understand his life better so we could have a better friendship. And who am I trying to kid, I wanted to be part of the glamorous lifestyle he led! Who wouldn’t want to experience that? 

This trip was fulfilling something for me that I had been aching for, for such a long time- something that made me feel special! Something that showed I was more than just ordinary. Something I could hold onto on the days when feeling special was a very distant thought. For the days the kids get sick, or money is tight, or things are crappy at work, or the husband is being an ass…something for those days! Every woman knows about those days, and it’s in those days that you need something to remind you that you are special and loved.

Suddenly, there was no more time for daydreaming. The captain was telling us it was time to descend into Heathrow airport. That knot in my stomach instantly doubled in size! I readied the kids for our landing and said a little prayer (to whom I’m not sure since my opinion on the existence of a deity changed from day to day) that I would make it through the next hour without passing out!

We never agreed on when we would meet up with Benedict. I didn’t know when we would see his face and also how many people would be around him when we did. As popular as he is, it is kind of hard to hide out in an airport (in London especially) without a crowd of fans mobbing him. As we got off the plane and into the First class lounge, there was a gentleman standing there with a sign that read “Lapierre Family”. Another bucket list item gone, having someone hold up a sign for me in an airport like they do in the movies! We went over to the gentleman and I told him who we were.

“Welcome Mrs. Lapierre, I hope you had a nice flight. My name is Walter and Mr. Cumberbatch has sent me to pick you up and take you to his location.” Walter was an older man, likely in his 60s, dressed in a suit. He had a nice warm smile that was very relaxing. For a couple of minutes my stomach knot became just a little bit smaller as I started conversing with Walter.

“Thank you Walter. Yes we had a great flight, didn’t we kids?” Both of them nodded and TJ chimed in with an “It was Awesome! Walter did you know we are going to meet Sherlock Holmes?” 

“Yes I did. Sherlock is my boss and he sent me to get you.”  
“Walter these are my children…” as I started to introduce them he stopped me. Oh I know who they are ma’am, this striking young lady would be Miss Alex and this rugged young man would be Master Thomas John.”  
“How did you know who we are?” TJ asked, “And you can call me TJ”  
“Oh Mr. Cumberbatch, Sherlock, told me all about you. He is so pleased that you are able to come visit him.”  
“Mrs. Lapierre, we should make our way to the luggage section so we can get your bags.”  
“Sounds good Walter but please call me Danielle. We are very informal and I will feel uncomfortable if you call me ma’am or Mrs. Lapierre.”  
“I’ll try ma’am, I mean Danielle. It’s going to be a hard habit for me to break though.” His eyes twinkled like he was enjoying a private joke.

We picked up our bags and made our way out of the airport. It’s much easier going through customs when you travel first class. They don’t ask near as many questions. I was still wondering how long it would be before we got to see Benedict but I certainly understood why he didn’t come to the airport himself. He’s a busy man plus the crowds of people surrounding him would have been tiring for us right now. I wasn’t sure either whether this trip was a secret he would be trying to keep from the public or not. When it was the 4 of us coming nobody would have thought too much of it.-just some family friends coming to visit. Now that Julien is not here, I could see the headlines now. “BENEDICT’s MISTRESS AND SECRET FAMILY FINALLY OUT OF HIDING”. Now that would go over so well for my family!

As we are stepping out in the gorgeous sunshine, I saw a very large limousine parked at the curb. Must be some important person heading out of town I guess, perhaps some business man from a fortune 500 company? As I squinted to take a closer look I see Walter has stepped ahead of us and is holding the door of the limousine open! 

“This is for us?” I ask, completely amazed at the thought that it could be.  
“Yes Ms. Danielle, Mr. Cumberbatch wanted you to ride in style today. Is this okay?”  
“Oh Walter, it’s more than okay, isn’t it kids?”  
“Mom, do we really get to ride in this?” TJ asked.  
“I guess so dear. Isn’t this awesome?”  
“Absolutely!”  
“Alex, are you going to be okay, you look like you’re in shock?”  
“What do you expect” she says, “It’s a limo Mum!”  
“We’ll let’s not just stand here, get in!”

Alex climbed in first, with TJ right behind her. They looked so small sitting in the large black leather seats. As I climbed in I noticed the driver behind the wheel. For some reason I just expected Walter would be driving but I guess I was wrong. I shouldn’t be surprised the Benedict would have a lot of staff working for him. 

With that we started out of the airport and onto the highway.


	12. A Surprise along the Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One the drive to meet Benedict, they make an unexpected stop.

Do we have far to go to get to Benedict’s house” I asked?  
“No too far and there is some nice scenery on the way” Walter replied.

“To us it’s all nice scenery”, I smiled. “I was here in London when TJ was little and the beauty of the city made me not want to go home. Unfortunately I didn’t have a choice, but I am so glad I’m back. I was afraid I would never get to see it again.” I was surprised by the small touch of sadness in my voice. I didn’t realize how much I yearned for this type of life. To live in such an exotic place, so far away from the drabness that was my life! 

We hadn’t driven too far when we were out of the main part of the city and on an open, very much less travelled sort of back road. I didn’t expect it would be this quiet, but it was lovely. I was even further surprised that we suddenly pulled over to the side of the road. Was there a car problem I wondered? I saw the driver get out of the car and make his way around to the passenger’s side. I couldn’t tell before because he was sitting down, but he was a very tall man with a slight build, and he was walking with a very elegant, formal gait.

“Are we having some car trouble?” I asked Walter.  
“No Ms. Danielle, we just needed to stop for a minute, there is something we want to show you” With that the driver opened the door and Walter motioned for me to get out. Hmmm…seems very odd, I thought, but then this whole experience is odd so I guess I’ll just enjoy it and go along for the ride.

I stepped out and the driver was standing facing me with his head slightly lowered. He motioned me to move a little way from the car.  
“What is it?” I asked. “What did you want to show me?”

“Nothing my darling, I just wanted to take a good look at you!” I stopped hearing the words he was saying and instead my heart lurched at the sound of his voice. That deep, strong, sultry voice I have heard so many times over the phone the last few months. The voice, millions had listened to on their radios, TVs and movie screens. I looked up and saw those eyes, those piercing blue green eyes that make women everywhere want to melt and right now they were fixed on me! 

“Benedict!” I screamed, with an intensity that surprised even me! Before I even thought about what I was doing, I had jumped into his arms and was hugging him like my life depended on it.   
“Yes darling, it’s me!”   
I then realized what I had done and sheepishly stepped back with a quick ‘I’m sorry”  
“Don’t be sorry. I’m just as glad to see you. Now step back again so I can get a better look. You have a huge advantage over me as I didn’t know until I saw you come out of the airport, just how beautiful you are.”   
“Oh stop. You’re making me blush!” and my face turned 12 shades of red.  
“I’m sorry for the deception but it was the best way I could figure out how to be there at the airport with you and not create a scene. I didn’t figure any of us needed a crowd to deal with today”

“I completely understand. I don’t think it would look good me giving you a huge bear hug in the middle of the airport. Probably would have created a disturbance” I was grinning from ear to ear, my heart still pounding through my chest. Here I was talking in very familiar terms with one of the world’s most eligible bachelors as if I was chatting with my neighbor.

“Shall we get back in?” he asked. I would have preferred to say no and just continue to stand there and look at him all day but I had to remember I had the kids in the car. So I took the hand he offered to me (a very warm, very soft, very large hand) and stepped back in. This time he was sitting across from me where Walter had been. Walter was very good at his job because somehow he had managed to sneak out of the back seat and up into the driver’s seat without me even noticing.

“Hello Alex” Benedict smiled at her and reaches out his hand. “Your Mum talks about you so much I feel I already know you.” She looked back at him like he had two heads as she can’t believe what is happening. She can’t believe that Benedict Cumberbatch, star of one of her favorite shows, was talking to her.

“Heeellllo” she stammers back. “I just love your show”   
“Thank you. Yes I guess I have you to thank for getting you Mum to watch my show. Otherwise we would never have become such good friends. Was she a really hard sell?”  
“Yes she was. She thought the shows were too long and she wasn’t really that interested at first but then she suddenly started enjoying them. Now she as addicted as I am!”  
“Didn’t like it eh? We may have to punish her for that now mightn’t we”, he teased and he reached across the seat and carefully grabbed my leg. Ooo the Goosebumps went up immediately and I got chills up and down my spine. Even this friendly touch was electric.  
“And hello to you TJ. What did you think about this big trip you took to come see me?”  
“It was awesome! The plane was sooo big. Bigger than the ones we were on to go to Florida. Sitting in the big seats was awesome and so is this car. I can’t believe I am in a limousine! “Too bad my Dad couldn’t come.” His innocent statement pulled me back into reality for a minute. How could I be feeling so giddy over this man, when I had a husband at home?   
“I wish your Dad could have been here too Sport. I would have liked to meet him. He is a very lucky man to have such a great family. I envy him!”  
With that we continued to drive on towards Hampstead Heath to Benedict’s home and our home away from home for the next week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have many other chapters in draft form that I am planning to add. Let me know if you want to know more of Danielle's story.


	13. Arriving at Benedict's Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First Glance inside Benedict's world

We pulled up into the Driveway of a beautiful 3 story building. The architecture was Victorian in nature with scrolled details, white columns and wrought iron balconies. It looked like a fragile sculpture that you would be afraid to touch lest it fall apart. It had the cutest little flower beds out front with a rolling waterfall. It was extremely inviting yet somehow you could tell it was rarely lived in. 

“Welcome to my home!” Benedict said as he stepped out of the car, holding the door for us to get out. The smile on his face was from ear to ear, giving me the sense that he was truly glad to have us here. Glad to be able to share his inner sanctum and allow people to see what his life is like. 

I was surprised to see that there were no fans waiting outside. There didn’t appear to be anyone around, yet I thought from what I had read that his home was close to the Hampstead Heath- a large park with rolling hills and swimming holes. If I could read this many others would have also and try to find him.

“There aren’t any fans waiting to catch a glimpse of you?” I asked. “I expected we would have to fight our way into your home”.

“No I have been lucky. I keep a small place in downtown London so people think that’s my main residence. I drop by every now and then so it keeps up the appearance that I actually live there. It has been very successful as I never get visitors here. When I say I live hear the Heath they think I’m giving false information so they believe the other flat to be my real home.”

“Oh aren’t you the sneaky one!”

“You’ll be thankful I am. Otherwise you wouldn’t get a moment of peace while you are here. The press would have you painted as my mistress and these, my long lost kids!”  
I immediately started laughing. Benedict raised his eyebrows as I had seen him do so many times in photos. The look that says-what’s up with you?

“I was laughing because I was thinking the same thing at the airport when we arrived. It’s so funny that we both thought of the exact same thing. Great minds think alike they say”

“Or kindred souls,” he added with another of his infamous smirks. No wonder he is such a good actor, the amount of different facial expressions this man has are never-ending.

“You home is so beautiful. This is why I love England. The buildings are so ornate and antique looking. They are truly works of art all on their own. It makes me feel like I have stepped back in time!” The words don’t seem to adequately express my sentiments. It felt to me like we had entered a different world. A world that I’m not sure we belonged in, but one that I definitely wanted to explore.

“It looks like a castle” Alex says. “I am so glad I brought my sketch book. There is so much here for me to draw!”  
“Oh yes your Mom told me you are a talented artist. Am I going to get to see some of your drawings? “Benedict asked.  
Alex blushed. “I don’t normally like people to see my work but I guess I can make an exception. They really aren’t that great.”  
“Let me be the judge of that my dear” he replies. “By the way I have a surprise for you” Once we get in and settled I’ll let you in on what it is”  
Alex’s face lit up! “A surprise? Oh I can’t wait”.  
TJ piped up, “Do you have any surprises for me?” he asks.  
“Of course I do!” Benedict replies. “I certainly wouldn’t forget to plan something special for your Mom’s number 1 guy!”  
“Oh yay! I love surprises!” He squealed.

Benedict then led us into the main door into a long hallway lined with marble tiles. Again the beauty of the design took my breath away. 

“I feel like I am walking into a decorating magazine” I announced. “You must have a good designer. I know you are good at a lot of things but surely you can’t be this good at interior design as well!”

“No, you are correct. A very good designer set this up for me. I had a lot of input, but it was her magic that put it all together. I did decide on all the things in my bedroom though as that is the one room that I wanted everything just the way I liked it. I am anxious for you to see it.” As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he realized what he had said, and the wickedest grin appeared on his face. I’m not normally a blusher but I know my cheeks turned red at the comment. Seeing the look on Alex’s face, he quickly added, “I would like to know what a woman, other than my designer, thinks of it.” This must have satisfied her as her face returned to normal. I on the other hand wasn’t sure if it was that innocent but I didn’t want to go there. This was supposed to be a plutonic relationship, one of mutual respect. Doing anything to damage my marriage is not what I had in mind. Having an attractive man find me interesting, what’s wrong with that? A little ego feeding never hurt anyone.

“Come on, let me show you to your rooms and then you can check out the rest of the house.”


	14. Benedict Surprises Us Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict goes to great lengths to get his house ready for guests

Benedict led us upstairs to the 2nd floor, where the guest bedrooms were.

At the top of the stairs, we stopped at the first door. “This is your room TJ” Benedict said as he opened the door. Behind that door was the most amazing boys’ room I have ever seen. It had a bunk type bed with a slide coming down to the lower bunk. One wall was decorated with pirates, one with racecars, one with dinosaurs and the last one was devoted to all kinds of sports. There was an arcade driving game, a pinball machine and a standup Pacman game in one corner of the room. In another corner there was a small pantry/fridge area that was filled with soda and snacks of every kind. In another corner there was a large TV with wireless computer and a video game player of every type. No matter what a young man liked, it would be in this room.

TJ’s eyes almost jumped out of his head when he saw it. “Is this really where I get to sleep?” he asked.   
“Yes buddy, it’s all for you to use.” Benedict replied. “Your Mom told me some of your favorite things and I had them put into your room.”   
TJ ran over and gave him a hug. “This is so awesome! Thank you” he said.

It was then that I noticed something else; in the room there was a large walk-in closet. When I went to put TJ’s suitcase in there, I saw that it was filled with all different types of boys’ clothes, all about TJ’s size. “Who owns these clothes?” I asked. “Do you have someone who stays here regularly with you?” He had never mentioned anyone else but then there is so much about him that I still did not know. Perhaps he did have a “love child” that no one knew about. A man with his looks, charisma and fame had no shortage of offers from women, so it wouldn’t be too much of a stretch to think that he may have a child.

“No silly, these are for TJ, that’s why I told you to pack lightly. I know how hard it is to travel this distance with a lot of suitcases so I did some shopping before you got here. TJ you can wear anything in here. If something doesn’t fit then I can have someone alter them for you. I took a guess of your size from the pictures your Mom has sent me”

“Awesome!” TJ said. I’ll take a look later. Right now I need to play some of these games. Is that okay Mom?”   
“Sure honey. Play what you want and you can have a small snack, but not too much. You stay here while Alex and I get settled. Okay?”   
“Absolutely, I don’t think I ever want to leave this room”

As we were leaving the room, I looked up at Benedict with complete shock and surprise on my face. To think he did all that for TJ and I was sure that there was something like this for Alex as well. Before I could say anything though, he put a finger to my lips and uttered a shhhh. “Wait until we are done looking before you scold me” he said. He was reading my mind again. 

As we got to the next door, I could see the look in Alex’s eyes. She knew if TJ’s room was that awesome, that she couldn’t wait to see what her room would be like. 

“Lady Alex”, he said in his most regal voice, “Your room awaits. I hope it is to your liking.” The door opened up and inside was a huge four poster canopy bed. The room was decorated in yellows and teals with an amazing butterfly mural on one wall. Another wall was decorated with photos of her favorite British actors: Tom Hiddleston, Tom Hardy, Martin Freeman, Matt Smith and David Tenant. She squealed in delight when she saw not only the fantastic pictures, but also that each one was autographed with her name on them! “Oh My God,” she screamed. “Mr. Cumberbatch, this is beyond awesome. I think I am going to faint!” 

“Don’t do that”, he said. “You havent seen everything yet, and I don’t know CPR to bring you back! Also please call me Ben; Mr. Cumberbatch is way too formal!”

“Okay Ben”, she said. “What more could there be, this is already too amazing as it is”. As she said this, she turned around and saw her own walk-in closet full of clothes from the trendiest teen shops in London. “Okay, I’m not going to faint, I am going to die! This is too much!”

“Again I hope they fit but if not we can exchange them or tailor them. And if you really don’t like them, one of my friends is a designer and she can take you out to the stores to find something more suitable.” I think he was smiling as much as she was. He looked so proud of what he had done and how pleased she was. 

“Remember though I said I had a surprise for you?   
“This isn’t it, there’s more?” she asked.   
“Well, you haven’t looked over here yet”. He pointed towards the smaller area of the room with a window seat. “Since you like to draw, I thought you might like some things to draw the view from your window”. She went over to look in the cabinet next to the window and found all the art supplies she could ever want. 

It was at this point that she ran over and hugged him. She was so overjoyed she was practically in tears. “Thank you so much!” she said. “Just when I thought it couldn’t get any better, it did!”  
“You’re welcome, my dear. I am so glad I could do this for you. It makes me happy to see you so thrilled” 

“Now”, he said, “Let’s let Alex settle in while I show you to your room” He looked over at me and I had tears in my eyes. As we walked out he asked, “Did I do something wrong? Did I upset you?”

“Oh no” I managed to squeak out between my tears. “Just the opposite. I can’t believe you went to all this trouble for the kids. Not only that but you got everything they could ever hope for. You put so much effort in getting exactly what they would like”

He laughed as he reached out and put his arm around me, to comfort me. His long arm wrapped around me almost twice. I could feel his warmth and breathed in his scent. He smelled like all the goodness of a beach combined with the aroma or a new car. Clean and crisp, a scent all his own. “You are so silly. I enjoyed every minute of preparing for your visit. You know how I have regretted not having my own children yet, this way I can spoil them and pretend for just a little while.” I could see the smallest sadness in his face when he said this. As an only child, I knew how much he had wanted to have a house full of kids by now. But his life took a different turn.

“You haven’t even seen what I put together for you yet!” he said as he led me up one more flight of stairs to the top floor.

As he opened one last door, he paused and said “I wanted this room to be special for you. You have become my confidante and one of my best friends and I wanted to try to give back to you, all the things you have given to me.” Again I had tears in my eyes as I entered the room, thinking of how much I had also gotten from this relationship and how amazing it was that I had made such an impact on a man I was only just meeting for the first time.

As I walked in, my breath left my body and I gasped.  
“You don’t like it?” he asked.

“Oh Benedict, it is the most beautiful room I have ever seen”. The room was done in lavenders, blues and gold’s. It looked positively regal. As in Alex’s room, there was a large 4 poster bed in the middle of the floor. There was artwork on the walls with the most gorgeous beaches and scenery from around the world. On another wall, there were pictures of Benedict’s family, his mother, father, half-sister and himself when he was younger. There was a large bookcase filled with antique books. They didn’t look like a library though; a lot of thought had been put into placing them with seashells and other collectables so as to make it look feminine. There was a dressing mirror and table with all the things a woman could want to make her pretty. The door to the walk in closet was closed but I expected it may contain clothes the same as the kids’ closets had.

“Good thing I listened when you talked about your favorite colors isn’t it?” he asked, his grin again taking up his entire face.   
“I guess. This is amazing. My favorite thing is the pictures of your family. You were so cute when you were little. Even then your cheekbones were awesome! And your Mom and Dad were quite the lookers then too weren’t they?” I couldn’t help gushing over all of them as they were such an extraordinary family.  
“Glad you like them. Mom helped me pick out the best ones.”   
“We will get to see your Mom and Dad soon?” I asked. I was so looking forward to meeting the people who created this man.  
“Yes actually they will be coming for dinner if you think you won’t be too tired.”  
“How can I even think about being tired when I have all of this to take in?” I asked.  
“Good. I was hoping you’d feel like that.” “Come, you haven’t even looked in your closet yet.” He said, leading me to the door. “I went shopping for you as well.”

He opened the door and the inside was filled with rows and rows of the most gorgeous clothes I had ever laid eyes on. There were tops and bottoms, shoes and boots. In one section there were at least 20 exquisite evening dresses in all lengths and colors.

“I wasn’t sure which ones you would like best so I asked the boutique owner to give me an assortment. I hope you can find something in it you like” He looked over at me with the shyest of looks. Like he was waiting for me to either praise or scold him. 

“Benedict…they are so beautiful. I feel like a princess with a fairy godfather. What did I ever do to deserve all of this?” I looked over at him with tears flowing freely now. I was so overwhelmed by all of it. 

“My darling, you deserve this and so much more. You have given me so much in the last few short months that this is the least I could do for you. Your friendship has meant so much to me. To have someone like me for who I am, and not who they think I should be, is such a rare gift. I couldn’t imagine I would ever find that.” It was then I noticed that he too had tears in his eyes. Those luminous eyes were crying because of me! How could that be possible?

I couldn’t resist going over to him and hugging him again, those comforting arms again wrapped tightly around me. We were so close I could feel his heart pounding against mine. I swear I could feel the blood coursing through his chest and I was sure he could feel mine. I looked up at him and he was looking at me the way I had always fantasized he would. The way I wished Julien would have. It was the look that said, I need you so much. You are the most important thing in the world to me. 

I instantly shivered and it allowed me to break this spell. A spell I didn’t want to break, but one I knew I had to if I wasn’t going to take this moment to a place we could never come back from. “Okay, enough of this mushy stuff, I teased.” “Time to have some fun”

He let out a little chuckle and composed himself. We headed back downstairs to see how the kids were doing. I realized as we headed down, that I never did see his room. I think that was a good thing for now as I’m not sure how that would have turned out.


	15. Benedict’s Inner Sanctum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle takes a peek inside of Ben's room to see what he is like.

The grounds were as well laid out and as meticulous as the inside of the house. There was even a small stable out back that had 4 horses inside. Benedict assured Alex that we would do some riding while she was here, which made her all the more excited about our trip. After having a proper tour of the grounds, the kids and I did start to feel tired

I hated to bail on Benedict to have a nap but I was afraid if I didn’t that I wouldn’t make it through dinner and I wanted to be at my best when I met his parents. So we excused ourselves and headed to our rooms. This would give Benedict some time to himself as I am sure all the hubbub of having 2 kids in the house would wear on him at some point. I love my kids but they wear on me after a while and I am used to them.

As I was heading into my room, I noticed the open doorway up the hall from me and wondered what room it was. I couldn’t help but take a peak as I was curious to see what the other areas of the house looked like. As I got to the doorway, I realized it was Benedict’s room that was open. I tried to decide if I dared enter it, or if I should wait for him to be there. I was too curious to stay outside and I thought it would be easier to see the room if I didn’t have him watching me. 

It was as grand as our bedrooms had been. His room was actually as I had expected it to be. Reds and golds adorned the walls and the bed. Making it look like a room fit for a king. But then why shouldn’t it be, he definitely was a king of sorts and he deserved to live like one. I went over to his shelf of books to see what was on them. Again there wasn’t much that surprised me as they were all first editions of some of the most well read and adored books of all time. There were mystery books and art books. There was Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights, the Count of Monte Cristo, a collection of Alfred Hitchcock books, the Glass Menagerie, Frankenstein and of course the complete Sherlock Holmes collection. I also saw the complete collection of JRR Tolkien books and all the Harry Potter books as well.

I turned to check out the photos on another wall. There were more family photos and photos of friends. I gasped then I noticed that one of those photos contained a picture of me and another picture of me with the kids taken earlier in the day when we arrived in London. His staff sure works fast! 

I couldn’t help taking a closer look at his bedside. I wanted to see what important things he kept there. On his nightstand was the book he was currently reading, his reading glasses and small box of chocolates. Hmmm….the man has a sweet tooth! His bed was covered in a dozen of the fluffiest pillows I had ever seen. I took a quick look around to make sure no one was watching and then I lied down on it. I had to see what it felt like, it looked so comfortable. I laid back and noticed a picture of the night sky was painted over his bed with an angel sitting on a cloud. How interesting, I thought. I guess this is what relaxes him at the end of a long day. I didn’t have time to think about anything else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry short Chapter, next one is longer!


	16. Sleeping Beauty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle wakes up in Ben's bed with him beside her.

The sky was so peaceful. I could imagine floating on the cloud with the angel. Then a hand touched my cheek. So soft and delicate was the angel’s touch, so warm and comforting. I reached out to touch it, to hold its hand in mine. I caressed the fingers that were gentling caressing my cheek and then the angel pulled my hand upwards and planted the softest kiss, ever so gently on my hand. “Hello sleepyhead”, the angel whispered. My eyes looked up at the angel and as they focussed on him, I noticed the angel had the most beautiful blue-green eyes. I remember seeing those eyes before, those haunting eyes. As my eyes focussed more clearly I saw that the angel was actually Benedict sitting there watching me! 

“Oh!” I startled. What had just happened?   
“It’s okay Danielle, it’s just me. You were having a dream. I’m not sure why but you fell asleep in my bed.”

“Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that. I have to confess when I saw this was your bedroom; I was too curious and wanted to come take a peak. When I noticed the mural above your bed, I lay down to get a better look and I guess my exhaustion took over and I feel asleep.”

“Don’t apologize. You looked so peaceful I had to come take a peak myself. This is the first time I had an angel over my bed and one in it at the same time” 

“Oh I bet you say that to all the girls!” I winked. His face got serious as he looked at me and said “Actually no I don’t. You are the first woman to ever lie down on this bed.” The look on my face must have radiated my shock as he was quick to continue. “I told you I keep the other apartment. It’s not that I never had a woman in my bed; but not in this one. This is my sanctuary and I was saving it for THE woman, the one who would mean something to me, and THE one who would touch my soul.”

Again I gasped. “I’m especially sorry then that I have ruined this for you. Now when that woman comes, she won’t be the first.” 

“You are the perfect woman to be the first” he said, “because you have touched my soul. We may not be lovers, but you have touched me in a way no other woman has. I hope Julien knows how lucky he is to have you. If you weren’t his wife, I would have woken you up much differently!” He then gave me that endearing smile that has made women all over the world die a thousand deaths. 

“Oh, Benedict, I feel the same about you; but, I am married and this can’t be more than a friendship. Maybe it’s better this way. If I weren’t married you would have never trusted my motives for our friendship. And I would not have looked at you in the same way. Our friendship developed because we knew that was all it could be and because there was no awkwardness between us. There was no pretending to be people we weren’t just to make an impression on each other. We were free to be who we really are and that’s why our relationship has become so special.”

“I know, but you can’t tell me that sometimes you don’t wish that things were different also? I can’t be the only one who feels this way,” he said.

“No you aren’t but that doesn’t make it any better. There is no use having feelings we can’t do anything about. Is this a déjà vu for you? Because it seems a little like the real life version of Parade’s end, only this time it’s not you who is the married one.” 

“It does seem a little like that doesn’t it?” he smiled.

‘Yes and I remember sitting in my living room watching Parade’s End and crying my eyes out because of the torment you were facing. The idea of the love that could not be, broke my heart. Even though it wasn’t real, I still felt your pain. That tells you what a great actor you are that you can evoke that much feeling from your audience.” I was sincere when I said this and I could tell he believed me.

“Perhaps, it also shows your caring and romantic soul; that a story like that could touch you so.” He added.

Just then I could hear the kids downstairs. “I think I better go see the kids. It must be time to get ready for dinner. I assume you dress up for dinner or are you more casual?” I wasn’t familiar with how they did things in a prestigious family like his.

“Not too fancy please” he grinned. “If I dress up too much for you then my mother will definitely be thinking thoughts we don’t want her to have.”

“Well we wouldn’t want that now would we? Just make sure you behave yourself at dinner so she doesn’t get the wrong idea.” I teased.

“Me? Misbehave?” The evil grin he gave next made me burst out with laughter.

“JJ didn’t ask you to be his villain for no reason now did he?” I said referring to the director of Star Trek.

“No, I guess he didn’t”

With that I went downstairs to start getting the kids ready for supper.


	17. Getting Ready

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben helps Danielle to get ready to great his parents

Where did the afternoon go? I barely had time to get TJ dressed and help Alex pick out a new outfit and it was almost time for Benedict’s parents to arrive. I hoped they had their son’s bad habit of being habitually late as I needed all the time I could get. 

I rushed to my closet to see what I could find, or should I say to try to narrow down the many choices that faced me. I was in the middle of trying to decide how formal to go when there was a knock at the door. “Are you decent?” the voice called from the hallway.

“Yes I am decent but I am in clothing hell!” I hollered back.

“Coming in then” the voice replied and with that Benedict entered the room.

Thankfully I had already done my hair and makeup but I was having so much trouble trying to find the right outfit. What does one wear to impress the famous and beautiful actress who has raised this magnificent man? Something that says “I like your boy but not in that way”. Something that says I am classy but not stuffy. Something that just says me. 

“Having a hard time deciding?” he asked as he swept into the room as elegant as he appears in his press photos. He was not overdressed but was simply wearing a black starched shift with a stand up collar with the top several buttons undone (the man does know what works on him!). The black pants he was wearing draped beautifully down his legs from his gorgeous hips, landing ever so slightly on the top of his shoes. He was wearing those beautiful blue suede shoes I had seen in photos. They added a bit of whimsy to an otherwise black outfit. The outfit shows him exactly as he is, slight formal, terribly elegant, but with a touch of fun. He must have noticed me taking him all in.

“You approve of my wardrobe choice do you?” he grinned.  
“Yes, you look amazing as usual” I just love those shoes.”  
“Good, I’m glad you approve. We’ll have to get you ready though unless you want to meet my parents wearing a bathrobe!”  
“Somehow I don’t think that would make the impression I was hoping to make!” I said returning his grin.  
“Would it be okay if I selected something? He asked  
“Go for it” I replied. “I don’t seem to be having much luck myself.

With that he walked into the closet and pulled out a simple blue sheath dress. It was plain in design but hung elegantly from the hanger.

“I think you would look lovely in this” he said.   
“And I would match your shoes” I added. “Do you think that’s wise?”  
“Its only shoes,” he said. “And besides my mother will want to take pictures of us and this way we won’t clash!”

“Okay, now get out so I can get ready.” I was pushing him towards the door as I spoke. I was running out of time.

“You’re sure you don’t need me to help you put the dress on?” He smiled that cheeky smile again.  
“Yes darling” I said using his own vocabulary against him. “I am quite sure”. And with this I pushed him out the door to put myself together.


	18. Meeting the Parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tim and Wanda come for dinner and Danielle reveals a surprise of her own.

I was with the kids checking to make sure they still looked presentable when I heard the doorbell. Immediately I got a grapefruit sized knot in the pit of my stomach. All the fears came to mind…would they like me, was I really dressed okay, what would I say to them? This was a huge moment for Benedict and me, it had the potential to make or break our relationship as I know how important his parents are to him.   
Oh well, I can’t stall any longer. “Come on guys, time to meet Benedict’s parents”

When we reached the bottom of the stairs, I was able to get a look at them before they saw me. They looked just as I had expected, just like they did in Sherlock. They were dressed for an evening out. He was wearing a nice suit, which like Benedict’s, hung on him nicely. His salt and pepper hair gave him an air of sophistication. She was dressed in a lovely pantsuit, and her hair hung down around her face. She had an air of elegance that was not put on but was genuinely part of who she was.

I didn’t have too long to look as they heard us approaching and immediately turned towards us. Smiles spread across their faces as they saw us for the first time. Thank goodness for those smiles as my grapefruit size knot shrunk down to an orange at the point!

“Oh what a lovely family!” Mrs. Cumberbatch spoke first. “Benedict has told us so much about you that I feel like I know you already!” 

“It’s so nice to finally meet you!” I replied. “We are honored that you wanted to meet us”

“Nonsense”, Mr. Cumberbatch chimed in, “It is us who are honored to meet you. Someone who has made such an impact on our Benedict is someone we couldn’t wait to meet.” When he smiled, I could see how much Benedict looked like him.

“You must be Alex” Mrs. Cumberbatch said holding out her hand to Alex. “You are as lovely as Benedict described you” For the second time in my life, I saw my daughter blush. 

“Nice to meet you” she managed to squeak out.  
“I hear you are a talented young lady—smart in school, a singer and an artist.”   
“Well my Mom likes to exaggerate but yes I do enjoy those things”

Then she turned to TJ. “And this handsome boy must be TJ”. She held out her hand for a handshake. “You are just the cutest thing I have ever seen. Are you enjoying your trip so far?”  
“Oh yes! Have you seen my bedroom? It is the best room ever!” TJ beamed with excitement.  
“I’m glad you like it. I know Benedict worked hard to get these rooms ready for you. He wanted them to be special”

Mrs. Cumberbatch turned her attention back over to me. “And what a lovely woman you are. That dress is divine on you. I would say that my Benedict took an interest in you because of your beauty but I understand he only saw you for the first time this morning, is that right?” She held out her arms for a hug, to which I reciprocated.

“Yes ma’am that right. I guess I thought it would be better if we developed our friendship based on our personalities and not what we looked like. Unfortunately for Benedict, he didn’t have that option” I laughed at what an understatement that was.

“Well I would say it worked out great for him. A good friend and a lovely lady, what more could he want!” With that I blushed. Then she added “and by the way, it’s Wanda and Tim not ma’am”.  
“Thank you, Wanda. I will remember that”. 

Poor Benedict hadn’t had a chance to get a word in edgewise. “Okay how about we come in and sit down and the interrogation can begin.” He grinned. 

We entered the living room for some more conversation before supper. Wanda and Tim were very good with the kids. They talked a lot with TJ, finding out about his life and talking about what interested him. When they saw him starting to get bored, they were the ones who suggested maybe he would like to go play before supper rather than sit there any longer with them. It didn’t take TJ long to agree and disappear upstairs.

“Such a lovely boy.” Wanda remarked after he had left the room. “So polite and the cutest cheeks I have ever seen”  
“Cuter then Benedict’s?” I asked.

“Just as cute for sure” Wanda replied. “You have done a great job with him” He’s very intelligent and a real pleasure to have around. You can’t say that about too many 10 year old boys. I remember Benedict at that age; he was a holy terror, always getting into trouble. Thank goodness, he found acting. It gave him an outlet for his hyperactivity”.

“Yes my Mum was so happy that the school finally stopped calling to say how badly her son was behaving!” That adorable grin came out again; the one that makes you want to jump up and attack him.

Then the conversation turned to Alex and her interests. I was afraid she wouldn’t say much but to my surprise she opened right up. For some reason she seemed to be finding it easy to talk to them. After a while we told her she could be excused to do some sketching before supper. I knew she was anxious to do some and I could tell she was getting talked out.

“Your daughter is exquisite also!” Wanda exclaimed. “Such a beauty. She certainly takes after her mother there.” “How is it that you have raised such a lovely teenager? The ones I have been around all seem to have an attitude about life and they don’t care about anyone but themselves”

“Oh don’t let her fool you; she has her moments like any teenager. She and I have spent more than our fair share of time fighting. But yes she is an extraordinary girl. When TJ was younger and struggled with his autism, she became his teacher, his guardian. Her biggest fault sometimes is only the size of her heart. She is an amazing girl but she struggled with her own self esteem. I really worried about her and the depression she was in, but now she seems to be coming out on the other side of it and finding her own way. Her father and I are very proud of the young woman she has become”.

The mention of Julien immediately changed the tone in the air from jovial to awkwardness. It was Tim who spoke up this time. “Oh yes, your husband; he wasn’t able to make it?” he asked.

“No, he became ill with the flu and wasn’t able to come. We almost didn’t come either but he insisted we did. He knew what a great opportunity this was for the kids and he didn’t want to ruin it.  
“Sounds like a good man” Tim added.   
“He is” I replied. I couldn’t bring myself to look at Benedict when I was complimenting my husband. Somehow it didn’t seem right. And with that the subject changed again.

We spent the next hour talking about me. It was like an interview but a comfortable one. I couldn’t blame them for wanting to know me better. I obviously had become a part of their son’s life and they would want to know me in order to make sure I wasn’t going to cause him any harm. I decided this was as good a time as any to let them in on my secret.

“I have a secret to share with all of you” I said  
‘Oh” Benedict looked at me surprised.  
“Benedict you know when we first met how I didn’t want to Skype with you and how you only got to see me when I arrived here?”  
“Yes” he said.  
“At the time I didn’t want you to see what I looked like because I thought you might decide not to continue our friendship”  
“That’s crazy why would you think that?” he said baffled.  
“Because of this” I pulled out a photo of me when I was 150 lbs heavier.  
“Wow, this isn’t really you is it?” he asked.  
“Yes I’m afraid it was” I looked at Wanda and Tim and I continued “I have lost all this weight since the time I first got interested in your work”  
“I would never have guessed this was the same person” he said  
“Let us see Benedict” Wanda said. When Benedict handed her the picture she was amazed as well as she passed it to Tim to see.  
“That’s amazing dear” Wanda said. “How did you do it?”  
“Well that’s the other part of the surprise” I started, “It was all because of your son!”  
“Me?” Benedict said, “How could it be because of me?”  
“Well, before I became familiar with your work, I really had nothing much that interested me. I was bogged down in being a mother, a wife and an employee and that was it. Once my daughter got me watching Sherlock and I realized how talented you were, it made me want to watch other things you had done. So all of a sudden I had a hobby that was keeping me busy and not thinking about food all the time. My eating became less automatically and before I knew it I had dropped 30 lbs. Then we started corresponding and I was excited by our friendship. It made me feel special that you trusted me and so now I wanted more for myself. So I decided that it was time to shed the weight. I started watching some of your videos while I was on the treadmill and because I was watching so intently I didn’t notice the time going by. The more results I saw the more I wanted to see and it kept going from there. I have had a weight problem most of my life and after many failed attempts, I am so happy to have finally conquered it” I looked Benedict straight in the eye and said “I know if it were not for you and your friendship, I wouldn’t have been able to do this.” Tears were welling up in my eyes.

Benedict couldn’t say anything for a moment; he just sat there with tears in his eyes. It was Wanda who spoke first.  
“That’s an amazing story!” she said.  
“Yes it is” Tim agreed. “You certainly aren’t that same woman now”  
“Benedict, have I embarrassed you?” I asked.  
“No silly, on the contrary, you have complimented me and I feel given more credit then I deserve.”  
“Believe me you were my partner in this, you just didn’t know it”  
“Well that was some surprise. I am in shock” he said  
“How much did you lose in total dear” Wanda asked  
“150lbs.” I replied. “I am embarrassed that I allowed myself to get to that size but what I realized is that I never put my needs first. I didn’t worry about what I was doing to my own body because I was busy being superwoman at work, an autism advocate for my son, trying to instill self confidence in my daughter and helping her through rough times and being a housewife as well. Something had to give and it was my food preparation and making right food choices. I used to eat when I was happy and when I was sad so it’s no wonder I put on that much. I just wished I had been able to stop it before it got to that point”

“Well the point is you did it now and that’s all that counts” Tim replied. That ended that discussion as we moved onto other topics.

I liked his parents. They were genuine people which I guess is why Benedict is the way he is. I got a chance to ask them questions about their lives, what it was like for them to be actors. I wanted to know everything about them as after all they made this man that drew me into this friendship. 

Dinner was nice, comfortable, relaxing. That knot in my stomach was long gone. I felt at home, like I had known these people forever, even though we had just met.

After dinner, Benedict and his Dad took the kids out to the stables to see the horses while Wanda and I sat down to have some tea. I guess I am going to have to start liking tea if I am going to hang around this lot!

“So tell me dear” she began, “I think you are a lovely girl with a lovely family and I think you are wonderful for Benedict, but I am wondering what your plans are for your relationship with him?” I wasn’t surprised by this question as Benedict had warned me that she would want to know. “How can you sustain this relationship and the one with your husband without anyone getting hurt?

“Believe me Wanda, the last thing in this world I want to do is to hurt Benedict or my husband. Benedict and I are just friends. He means the world to me but we aren’t in this for a romantic relationship, we can’t be. He knows that my marriage is important to me, that I love my husband. But we are good for each other. It has made me feel more comfortable in my life and has allowed Benedict to know he can have a normal relationship with woman. He has yearned for a family and while I can’t give him his own, I have been able to share mine. I would like to help him find THE woman. To show him how to be himself in a world that only wants “Benedict Cumberbatch” and not Ben.

“I know dear and I think your intensions are genuine. But I also think the two of you are naïve if you think you can maintain this friendship without wanting more. I have seen the way he looks at you and I haven’t seen that look in his eye since he was with Olivia. Even then she didn’t bring out the spark in him that you do. I also see the way you look at him when you think no one is watching. Your eyes shine, your cheeks become rosy and you glow. You look at him like he’s the most important person in the world. But how can he be when the father of your children is at home waiting for you?”

She wasn’t saying any of this to be mean or to hurt me. She was sincerely trying to figure out what was best for me and her son.

“I know Wanda, it’s hard but we know what we are doing. I do love my husband and I also love the friendship I have developed with your son. All I can say is, for now it works for us and when it comes to a time when it doesn’t work anymore, we will deal with it then.” “I expect he will grow tired of me before too long and move onto other interests”

“I wouldn’t count on that darling” she said and then thankfully the others returned from the stables at just that precise moment. This discussion was getting too intense.


	19. How Did We Do?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Debrief after Wanda and Tim leave

After Wanda and Tim said their goodbyes, Benedict let out a huge sigh of relief. “I’m so glad that’s over!” he said. “Don’t get me wrong, I love seeing my parents but I felt like we were under surveillance all night”

“No kidding. They are adorable, even nicer then I imagined; but yes I felt like I was on a long job interview!” Wanted: One friend for our son and you better be a good one!” At that we both started laughing.

It was time for TJ to go off to bed. When I went up to tuck him in, I noticed Benedict was there also. “TJ and I were just talking” he said, “and if it’s okay with you, I would like to read to him from the Hobbit before he goes to sleep”  
“Yes Mom, can he?” TJ asked. “Benedict can do lots of voices”.

“Fine with me” I replied. I knew how much this would mean to Benedict as his Dad had read that book to him as a small boy. It would be fun for TJ too as although I had read to him a lot when he was younger, reading was not something Julien enjoyed.

I bent over and gave TJ his goodnight kiss and hug and told him to turn the lights out when they were done. I left then and made my way to Alex’s room to see what she was up to.

“Hey kiddo..watcha doin? I asked. She was sitting at the easel, drawing something.

“Oh just trying to capture some of the things I took in today.” She replied.  
“So how has the trip been for you so far?” I asked.  
“Oh Mom, do you have to ask? If has been amazing!”  
“It has been pretty amazing hasn’t it, and its only day 1!”  
She looked at me for a moment as if not sure whether she should say something or not. Then she said, “I have to ask Mom, why are we here? Are you and Benedict having an affair?”

While it was a fair question for her to ask, the bluntness of it shocked me!  
“No sweetheart, no!” I replied. “I love your Dad and Benedict is just a friend. It may seem like more, but that’s not why we are here. We are here so that Benedict can get to know my family and I, his. Remember if your dad wouldn’t have gotten sick, he would be here too.”

“I guess so.” She said. But I could tell she still wasn’t too sure. “I forgot that Dad was supposed to come as well. Benedict has been so nice but I see the way he looks at you and you at him, and it seems like more than that to me.”

“Oh Sweetie” I went over and gave her a hug, “I’m sorry if I worried you, but believe me, nothing is going on between us. Someday, if you are lucky, you will have a platonic friendship with a man and you will understand. For now you will just have to trust me.”  
Changing the subject I said, “Don’t draw too long. You should be getting some sleep. It’s been a long day for all of us”

“Yes it has” said Benedict from the hallway.   
“TJ all tucked in?” I asked.  
“Yep, he fell asleep while I was reading to him.”   
“He was tired out” I replied. “And I am too. I think I’m going to head to bed also.You won’t find me rude if I do, will you?”  
“Don’t be silly, of course not” he answered. “I think I am going to do the same. More exciting things planned for tomorrow so we all need our sleep”

On that note we all headed off the bed. It took a while for me to get to sleep as Wanda’s words kept circling around in my head. Could we continue to be just friends without someone getting hurt? I didn’t know but I knew I couldn’t stop this now as it meant too much to me and to Benedict also. Finally exhaustion took over and I drifted off.


	20. Sleep?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict’s POV on meeting Danielle

Benedict may have gone to bed, but he was far away from going to sleep. His mind kept going over the day’s events.

From the moment she walked out the airport, he was mesmerized by her beauty. The way she moved was like she walked on clouds, she was so graceful. He lost his focus when he starting looking down the length of her long slender legs. Her hair was a stunning dark brown with caramel highlights that glistened in the sun. It hung down the sides of her face, framing the most hauntingly beautiful dark brown doe eyes Benedict had ever seen. Her lips were a cherry red and he could tell even from a distance how soft and succulent they were. It was a good thing he was sitting down in the car when he saw her or else the bulge in his pants would have made it obvious to anyone watching him just how attractive he thought she was. 

When he was able to pull over and got her next to him outside the car, he realized how nervous he was to be that close to her. When he lifted his hat and she looked at him with those eyes, he went weak in the knees; luckily she was too excited herself to notice. She surprised him further when she leapt into his arms. She felt so good next to him and she smelled heavenly. To think that this wonderful creature was the person he has confided in for the last 7 months. Had he known then what she looked like, it would not have taken him so long to see her for the first time.

Her children were charming. TJ was a cute young boy that reminded Benedict a bit of himself- intelligent and inquisitive- and very much taken with his mother. Alex was a beautiful young woman who had her mother’s good looks. She would break many hearts someday. They were both so well mannered; it was clear how good a mother she was.  
Benedict was so pleased that they liked the rooms he had done up for them. It truly was a labor of love for him to have these rooms done. He wanted everything to be perfect. Danielle had given him so much he wanted to give back to her in return.

He couldn’t believe her transformation from an obese woman to this slender woman he saw before him today. Even more unbelievable was the fact that she credited him with being an instrumental part in her change. Obviously he made as much of an impact on her life as she had on his.

Finding Danielle asleep in his room was a “dream come true”. He had wanted for so long to have someone to love, someone to share his life with. He wanted nothing more than to have a beautiful woman to share this bed with. She looked like an angel and he hated to wake her. He knew she belonged to another man, but he couldn’t help but have these feelings for her. He had felt this way about her even before he knew what she looked like. Her warm and caring attitude and the friendship she shared with him, had caused him to fall in love with her. He didn’t know it until today, but when he saw her, his heart reacted in a way he had never felt before. She was the total package and now he needed to figure out how to win her over. He wasn’t interested in being a home wrecker, but he knew she hadn’t been happy with Julien for some time. So for now he would be a supporting friend, but when the time was right, he would let her know how much more she meant to him.


	21. Waking up Day 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle and Ben make plans for the Day

I awoke to the sun beaming brightly into my window. I expected London to be overcast and cloudy but this morning’s weather was as cheery as I felt. I woke up with a smile on my face as I remembered all the wonderful events of yesterday. Everything had been perfect, I couldn’t imagine how today could get any better.

I hadn’t been awake long when my cell phone rang. I didn’t recognize the number but I picked it up anyway. “Good morning darling”. His words dripped with sexiness even over the phone. “Did you sleep well last night? Or did you miss my bed?” He chuckled as if making a joke, but the very words he said made me weak in the knees. This man knew exactly what to say to make a woman swoon.

“Good morning Benedict. Yes I slept well. You know you really need to watch what you are saying. Someone might hear you and misunderstand what you mean. Besides you need to save all your seduction techniques for women who aren’t married!” It was my turn to laugh a little. 

“I guess that’s true, but I thought I would practice them on you to know if they are effective. Are they?”   
“Yes they are rather effective. Now put them away before you hurt yourself!”

“If I must. Would you mind if I pop over, I would like to chat about the day.”  
“Sure, just make sure you have some clothes on. The kids may decide to come up and I don’t want you to put Alex’s teenage hormones into high gear.”  
Laugher came from the other end of the line. “I will ensure I am appropriately covered up my dear.”

I decided I should also put on a robe to ensure there were no issues. The bed was so cozy I wasn’t ready to leave it yet. I had just gotten back into bed when the knock was at my door. “Come in”

The door opened and there was Benedict in his white robe and slippers. To my satisfaction he did have pajama bottoms on underneath. I didn’t need any more temptation then what was already around me. My hormones may not be that of a teenager’s any more but around this man they were certainly on high alert.

He walked over and perched himself on the end of my bed. “Even first thing in the morning you look lovely” he said.   
“Flattery will get you nowhere Mr. Cumberbatch; but thank you for the compliment.”   
“I call it as I see it” he said. “I have more plans for us today if you are up to it.”  
“I’m up for anything” I said; but as soon as the words were out of my mouth I knew that was the wrong thing to say.  
“And you accuse me of being naughty!” he said.   
“Sorry, mine was unintentional!” I blushed.  
“Okay you are forgiven. Anyway I was thinking that today we could do some touristy things. Let the kids see the sights.”  
“That would be lovely. Do you dare go out to places like that? Won’t you be mobbed? I asked  
“I actually have a very good disguise that I only use on special occasions as I am never recognized when I use it. I keep it for a time when I really don’t want to be noticed and I believe today is one such day.”

“Sounds great. What did you have in mind?”  
“Well I know you have been here before but the children haven’t so I thought we would do a tour of the usual places: the Tower Bridge, Buckingham Palace and the Eye. And then we could take a tour of the Sherlock set if that would interest you?”

“Oh my God yes. Alex will be over the moon and TJ will find it fascinating.”  
“The good news is that we aren’t taping right now which is why I have time to spend with you, but that’s also the bad news as it means there won’t be anyone on the set.  
“Oh that’s okay” I lied, because it would have been awesome to see him in action. “I’d rather spend the time with you then just watching you”  
“Okay so that’s the plan. Before we go see the kids there is one more thing I wanted to mention to you.”   
“Sure, what’s up?” I asked  
“I am still amazed by your weight loss. I can’t believe that I helped make that much difference for you.”  
“Sorry maybe I shouldn’t have told you that. Did I freak you out?”  
“No but it makes me feel a little overwhelmed that I could have that much impact on another person.”  
“Benedict that’s what I have been telling you all along. You don’t realize how special you are. When I started admiring your work, it led me to reading your articles and interviews. You offered up so much of yourself in such a selfless way that it made me want to be a better person. And thanks to the internet, it was like having you there beside me helping me stay on track. You and I becoming friends only further cemented that feeling as I felt special that someone like you would find me interesting.”

“That’s how you make me feel. I didn’t know what you looked like and it didn’t matter to me; all that mattered was how caring you were and how much you helped me. Even if you still weighted 150lbs more I would have wanted you for a friend. It’s not your body I fell in “like” with it was your mind and your soul.”  
“Thank you Benedict, that means a lot to me”  
“Okay now let’s go get the kids” he said and off we went for breakfast.


	22. The London Eye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While showing his guests the town, Benedict reveals more to Danielle than she may be ready to hear.

Seeing London with a true Brit is much more interesting than heading out on your own. Benedict was so excited to show off his city that it made it that much more enjoyable.   
Benedict had told Alex he would have a surprise for her and I think she figured the pictures in her room was that surprise. But he had another surprise. Just before we left for sightseeing, a car pulled up to the house and a very handsome looking young man stepped out.

“Alex?” Benedict called. “Your surprise is here.”  
She came rushing to the front door. “What is it?” she asked.  
A better question is ‘Who is it?” he replied and with that the door opened and the young man walked in.

“Hello Mr. Cumberbatch” the boy said.  
“Hello Mac” Benedict replied. It’s Benedict though, not Mr. Cumberbatch. Why does everyone always insist on being so formal?”

The boy was very handsome and looked to be around Alex’s age, maybe a little bit older.  
‘Alex I would like you to meet Mac. I believe you know who Mac’s uncle is. Mac why don’t you tell her”

“Hello Alex, pleased to meet you” he held out his hand to shake hers. “My uncle is David Tenant. Benedict tells me you enjoy his work.”  
I thought Alex was going to hit the floor. “Yes I do, very much” she said, looking a little pale. You are really his nephew?”  
“Yes I am and I have lots of stories I can share with you about him later!”

“I thought you might enjoy today more if there was someone closer to your own age joining us so I invited Mac to come along. Is that okay?”  
“Absolutely!” she said. All she could think of was how attractive this boy was and how jealous her cousins would be. 

“And TJ” Mac said, “You can hang around with us too” Alex’s face said she wasn’t too crazy about that idea but she didn’t complain. She was going to have too much fun to worry about TJ tagging along.

So off we went, spending the day at the biggest attractions in town. We didn’t get any special treatment as Benedict was in the best disguise I had ever seen. He had in the colored contacts he wore in one of his movies so his eyes looked brown instead of their naturally twinkling blue green. He had hair extensions in to make his hair appear much longer then it was. He had on the Canadian jersey that we brought for him and he carried a small backpack so he looked like a regular tourist. If I hadn’t known it was him, I wouldn’t have guessed. Plus no one would expect him to be out and around with a woman and 2 kids and a young man. He also used his American accent to make it look like we were just an ordinary family out with a young British tour guide.

The day was a success. The kids loved it. I loved it. The best was when we were up on the Eye. It wasn’t busy that day so Mac and the kids managed to get in one car and we got in another. I thought it was odd because usually they like to fill the cars; but what I didn’t know was the Benedict had paid the operator to ensure it happened that way.

“Are you enjoying the day my dear?” he asked.   
“Oh yes I am, immensely!” I replied.  
“Oh good, I’m so glad. Your kids are adorable and they seem to like Mac an awful lot.  
‘What’s not to like about him? He’s amazing”  
“I’m glad to have a few minutes alone with you though” he said. “I so enjoy your company and it’s hard to talk when the others are around”  
“I enjoy talking to you too Benedict”  
“I love that you call me that, not Ben like everyone else. Why do you though?”  
“You are too special to have a common name like Ben. Benedict is more befitting you and I plan to keep calling you that if that’s okay?”  
“Please do. It sounds so nice coming out of your lips”  
I could feel my face flush once again at him speaking to me this way. If only? But no I immediately pushed that thought out of my head. 

“Benedict, please don’t make this more difficult than it is” I pleaded. “As much as I adore you, you know I can’t do anything to jeopardize my marriage. You need to find someone who can be all yours.” My heart was breaking as I said this because in truth I didn’t want him to find anyone. I wanted to be his special person, I didn’t want to share. Tears started running down my cheeks as the truth of how I felt could not be contained by my words.

He reached down and placed his hands one on each side of my face. Without saying a word, he kissed away the tears I was crying with his soft supple mouth. Each kiss sent shocks into my body, each one allowing my body to betray my words. I looked up at him, pleading for him to make this anguish I was feeling stop. I should never have come here; I should never have put myself in this position!

“Benedict stop!” I cried as I pushed him away   
The hurt on his face made me feel even worse. How could I have done this to him? How could I have allowed us to get to this place when I knew I wasn’t a free woman? When I knew I couldn’t give myself to him.

“You know we belong together” he said. “I can feel it in my bones when I touch you. I will stop for now, but I know it’s only a matter of time. I will wait because you are worth it!”

“It’s not fair to make you wait. You deserve more!”  
“That is up to me to decide and I have decided that you are what I need. However long it takes for us to be together, that’s how long I will wait!”

Just then the ride car started coming back to the exit ramp. I could see the kids outside getting off their car. I had to compose myself as they couldn’t know anything was wrong. 

We got off the ride and back in the car like nothing had just happened. Like the most heart wrenching moment in my life didn’t just occur!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More Chapters coming tomorrow


	23. Where do we go from here?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben surprises TJ and Alex

After the EYE, we headed out to the Sherlock Studio. I somehow managed to pull   
myself together so the kids would not be aware anything was wrong. Thankfully being   
on the Sherlock set took any scrutiny off of us. 

It was amazing to see it in person. We went to the Morgue set first, then Mycroft’s   
office, then to police station and lastly to the Baker Street apartment set. Here is where   
Benedict once again managed to surprise us. He said there would be no one on the set   
because they weren’t filming right now. What he didn’t say was that he had invited   
many of the cast and the producers and writers to the set so we could meet them! 

When we walked on the set, all of a sudden people starting coming out of the woodwork!   
Martin Freeman and Amanda Abbington, Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss, and Louise   
Brealey and Andrew Scott were all there to meet us. 

“Oh my God!” Alex shrieked as she saw them all. 

“Benedict, what did you do?” I asked. 

“Well it wasn’t easy and you must have the luck of the Irish as they say, because it just   
happened that everyone was available to drop by to meet you!” 

While TJ didn’t realize how huge an event this was, he did recognize Martin and walked   
over to him. “You’re Watson, aren’t you?” he asked. 

“Yes I play Dr. Watson on the show but my name is Martin” he said 

“Wow, my middle name is Martin, but I am named after my uncle. Are you named after   
my uncle also?” TJ replied. 

Everyone chuckled at his comment. “No TJ, I am named after my uncle. I guess we both   
have uncles named Martin.” Martin replied. 

“Cool” TJ said. 

Benedict introduced us to everyone. Each actor brought us an autographed picture.   
They were all so sweet, because they acted genuinely interested in talking to us when we   
know they must have more important things to do Amanda and Martin, on the other hand,   
were very interested in talking to me. As Benedict had the kids occupied with the others,   
Amanda pulled me aside to chat with her and Martin. 

“Danielle, come chat with us” she said. “We need to find out more about you, this   
woman who has Benedict so Cumberbatched as they say!” We laughed at her using   
Benedict’s name as a verb like his fans had been doing. 

“Oh I don’t know about that, were just good friends. No batching going on here Ms.   
Abbington.” I replied. It made me think back to our earlier conversation though which I   
quickly tried to remove from my mind. 

“Amanda please” she was quick to correct me. “Martin and I are great friends of Ben’s   
and any friend of Ben’s is a friend of ours.” 

“Thank you” I replied. “I’m just not used to this world yet” I went on. “In my world, we   
don’t run into celebrities around every corner, and if we did we wouldn’t expect them to   
know us or care who we are!” 

“Well, this is Benedict’s world and he’s so glad to have you in it. We don’t bite; at least I   
don’t think we do. We’re just normal people like you; people just know who we are.   
Martin and I have kids same as you. Are you going to be in town long as perhaps we   
could get them together?” 

“Yes” Martin said, “You ladies can get together with the kids and Ben and I can go   
drinking?” he grinned. 

“I don’t know” I said, “I have seen the two of you acting like you were drunk and it   
wasn’t pretty. I can only imagine with the real thing would look like” 

“Trust me, it isn’t!” Amanda replied. 

“We are only here for a week but if you and Ben can work something out we would love   
to.” I said. “Or perhaps Amanda and I can go shopping and you can Ben can stay with the   
kids?” 

“See I knew I was going to like her!” Amanda said to Martin and smiling at me. 

Martin and Amanda and I talked for what seemed like hours but was really only minutes.   
I told them how much we loved their acting and they in turn told me how Benedict had   
changed since we started our friendship. They told me that Benedict had started to have   
more confidence in himself and although he is normally a happy guy, he seemed extra   
happy these last 7 months. I thanked them for the compliment and said it was the same   
for me. 

After an hour of their time, we all posed for pictures as a group. It was an amazing end to   
our touristy day.


	24. More surprises!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben surprises Danielle with an invitation and Julien surprises her with his reaction

We went back to Benedicts for supper. Mac was joining us. He and Alex seemed to be   
hitting it off. I am not sure who was more smitten with whom, but I didn’t mind. At her   
age I would have killed for this kind of attention and I knew she knew how to handle   
herself so I wasn’t worried. 

When we arrived at the house, Wanda and Tim were there. I didn’t know they would be   
coming. 

“Benedict, what’s up?” I asked. “Is this another surprise?” 

“Well, kind of. I asked Mom and Dad to pop over to stay with TJ tonight as I know Mac   
wanted to invite Alex out to see some more of the town, and I had something I thought   
you might be interested in.” That smile was back and so was that knot in my stomach. 

“Oh, what did you have in mind?” 

“I did get you all those beautiful clothes; it would be shame not to have someplace to go   
to wear them. There is a celebration ball tonight as a follow up to the BAFTA awards   
and I have 2 tickets if you are interested in going with me” 

“Of course I would be interested! You just invited Cinderella to the Ball. What girl   
wouldn’t want to go?” Then I whispered to him, “but, let’s go talk about this first.” 

“Alright, Mom can you look after getting TJ ready for dinner and whatever else the kids   
need?” 

“Of course, darling. You two go get ready and don’t worry about the kids. They will be   
fine with us” 

“Thanks” I replied and then Benedict and I went upstairs to talk. 

“Are you sure you want to be seen in such a public place with me?” I asked. “You know   
what kind of commotion this will start” 

“Yes I know and I am ready. Are you ready for it? We will be with other celebrities so   
to them it won’t be a big deal. Those I know well know you are coming and they are   
anxious to meet you. It’s the photographers who will have a field day with this.” 

“If you are okay with it, then I will be too. I will have to call Julien first though as if he   
sees this on the news or internet he will freak. I wouldn’t want to do that to him. I need   
to make sure he understands and it okay with it too.” 

“Of course, that would be the right thing to do.” 

“So after you make that call, go get ready. For this special night, I had my stylist pick out   
a dress for you, and there’s a hair stylist and makeup artist waiting for you as well” 

“Cinderella I guess! Okay, I’ll call Julien and then get Alex to come up as I am sure she   
would want to see all this in action. 

So I went into my room and asked all the stylists to give me 15 min. alone. I then dialed   
home. That grapefruit was back but this time it wasn’t due to excitement, it was due to   
anxiety. I hadn’t called Julien since we got here and I wasn’t sure how he would react to   
my question. 

He answered on the first ring, “Hi dear..how are you?” I asked. 

“Good I guess. I was expecting you to call last night once you arrived,” he answered   
back. He was already sounding a little annoyed. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were expecting me too. It was late by the time we settled   
in and we all were exhausted. Today we started out early and just got back in so this was   
the first time I had a chance to call. How are you feeling?” 

“Better” he said, his voice sounding a bit more relaxed then it had been. “I’m still feeling   
weak but I am starting to feel more human again. So what exciting things have you been   
doing, and how is ole Cumberbatch?” 

“Cumberbatch is fine. He has been treating us like royalty. He has been spoiling the kids   
rotten since we got here. We all wish you could be here to enjoy it with us.” 

“I’m sure not everyone is disappointed that I am not there!” he said, this time he didn’t   
try to hide his disdain for the situation. “I’m sure old Sherlock is happy to have you to   
himself!” 

“Benedict has been a perfect gentleman and you have nothing to be worried about. His   
Mom and Dad were here last night for supper and he invited David Tenant’s nephew to   
join us today as some company for this kids.” 

“Well isn’t that nice. Meeting the parents!” again with the anger in his voice. 

“Julien, if you didn’t want us to come here you should have said something before we   
left. I’m not going to let your jealousy ruin our trip. It’s too important to me and the   
kids. Besides, after 20 years I would think you would trust me by now!” 

“I do trust you” he said, his voice softening a little. “It’s just that how can I compete with   
him,” 

“You don’t need to compete, you just need to love me and show me you love me.” 

“I do” 

“Good. Now I have something to ask you and I hope you will be okay with this too.” 

“What’s that?” 

“Benedict has an award party to go to tonight and he has asked me to go with him. I   
wanted to make sure you are okay if I go because there is a very good chance that we will   
end up in the press together and I didn’t want you to be surprised. I really want to go as   
this will be the most amazing experience hobnobbing with all the celebrities. Please say   
you are okay with this?” I was almost pleading with him to say yes. 

“Are you kidding? You want me to say I’m okay with you showing up on the arm of one   
of the world’s most eligible bachelors? That I’m okay with the world knowing what a   
chump I am for letting my wife spend time alone with him? What kind of a fool do you   
think I am?” 

“Julien! You know there is nothing between Benedict and me, how many times do I have   
to keep saying it? Do you think I would have called to tell you if there was? This is a   
great opportunity and I was hoping you could put your jealousy away and let me enjoy   
this night.” 

“Well, I’m sorry but I can’t. If you really love me you won’t go. You are my wife and   
not his plaything!” 

‘Well guess what? I don’t belong to you either. I am my own woman and I can make my   
own decisions. And this woman has decided she wants to party and you aren’t going to   
stop me. Did I make a fuss when you went to the strip clubs with the guys, no! If I mean   
that much to you, you would think you could bring yourself to show me some affection.   
I’m not going with Benedict because I want something to happen, but it would serve you   
right if it did! You can’t leave me on a shelf until you decide you want me.” 

“Well go if you want but don’t be surprised if I’m not around when you get back!” He   
was shouting now. 

“I want you to be there but I’m not going to beg you. Be there if you want to but only if   
you really want to!” And with that I hung up the phone. I knew this wouldn’t be an easy   
discussion but I never expected him to act like this. How dare he treat me like his   
property! I am my own woman and its time he realized that! I went to the door and let   
everyone back in, I was going all out for this evening and nothing was going to stop me! 

I called for Alex to come see what she thought of the dress the stylist picked out for me.   
It was a ravishing red taffeta gown with intricate lace embroidery around the bodice. It   
was held in place by one small strap over the left shoulder and the beautiful a-line waist   
draped snugly around my body. The shoes were golden strappy sandals made for a   
goddess. It was the most beautiful gown I had ever seen. Anyone would look good   
wearing this! What a long way I was from that 300 lb woman I was a mere 7 months   
ago. For the first time I felt beautiful inside and out. 

The hairdresser pinned my hair up on the sides, making it look like my hair was longer   
than it really was. The diamond choker and matching earrings accentuated the length of   
my neck. After my makeup was applied, I looked into the mirror to see the final result.   
I didn’t recognize myself. How they ever made me look this good was a testament to   
their skills. 

Alex looked at me with surprise and awe. “Mom you look so beautiful! You will fit   
right in with all those celebrities. Benedict will be lucky to have you with him.” 

“Thanks honey. You have made my night”


	25. Oh What a Night!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fairytale evening leads to some confessions.

Benedict and I said good night to the kids and his parents and headed out the door to the   
limo waiting outside. Of course we would be riding in a limo as this was an important   
event and we needed to look good. 

Wanda and Tim gushed over us when we left. I have to say we looked good! Cinderella   
had nothing on me. Wanda took lots of pictures of us alone and with the kids. Benedict   
was surprisingly quiet when he saw me inside. There was none of the usual flattery I had   
come to expect; perhaps I disappointed him. He on the other hand was nothing short of   
an Adonis! The man sure did look good in a tux! He looked like he just stepped out of a   
CG magazine shoot. His eyes were sparkling harder than I had ever seen them before.   
His muscular torso was pulling at the buttons on his shirt, as if they were trying to get   
out. His cheekbones and dimples were on high alert this evening. He couldn’t have   
looked any better if he tried. 

As he helped me into the car and took his place alongside me, he turned to me and stared.   
“Is something wrong?” I asked. “Do I not look alright? Have I disappointed you?” 

“Of my darling no, just the opposite. I couldn’t say anything before when I first saw you.   
If I did your kids would have seen me drooling over their mother. You look spectacular!   
I will be the envy of every man at this party! Disappoint me, my god you can’t imagine   
how stunning you are!” 

“Oh Benedict, stop please. You are going to make me cry and then my makeup will be   
ruined.” I didn’t tell him I had already cried after my conversation with Julien. I had been heartbroken that he thought so little of me, so little of our marriage to make those   
threats. I couldn’t tell Benedict that, so I kept it to myself. 

“Okay but you better get used to it because you are going to be getting a lot of attention   
tonight my dear!” 

“I’m not used to being thought of as beautiful. I think in my head I will always be that   
fat person” I said. 

“Well darling, let me tell you that is only in your mind. There is not a trace of that other   
person here tonight. I am going to have to beat off the other men with a stick” 

I grinned; feeling like my life had completely changed. 

It didn’t take long for us to get to the party. The limo stopped and Benedict came around   
to my side of the car to help me out. I could see all the people, all the photographers   
outside waiting to get a photo of Benedict and to see if anyone was with him. 

When he took my hand and helped me out, all I could hear were people screaming his   
name and flashbulbs everywhere. It was blinding. As I emerged I heard the gasps as   
people wondered who this mystery woman was on Benedict’s arm. 

As we made our way up the carpet and into the party, Benedict stopped for a moment to   
wave at his fans. He then gave the onlookers what they wanted, he introduced me to   
them. “This is my friend Danielle from Canada. Please help me show her a warm   
London welcome won’t you?” 

Well what Benedict wants Benedict gets. Instantly I heard people calling my name and   
snapping pictures of me. I suddenly became interesting because I was on Benedicts arm. 

I waved and smiled. Why not? This was the most exciting thing that had ever happened   
to me and I was going to fully enjoy it. 

After what seemed like an eternity, we made it into the party. Here again we were   
instantly swarmed, but this time by other celebrities who wanted to see who Benedict had   
with him. I met so many of his friends. The men seemed to be interested in talking to   
me about where I was from and how did I ever end up with this loser-they joked. The   
women were more interested in the gossip. How long have I known Benedict, how long   
had we been dating? They seemed surprised to hear we were just friends. I don’t think   
they believed it, not because they didn’t think it could be true, but because they didn’t   
want it to be. A scandalous affair was more interesting than the truth 

That night was like a dream. Benedict took my hand and led me to the dance floor. He   
put his hand in the small of my back and gracefully twirled us in and around the others. I   
should not have been surprised that he has mastered the art of the dance the same as he   
had mastered everything else in his life. I never enjoyed dancing so much as I did then.   
To have a man want to dance, and who moved with such grace and energy, was   
something I had never experienced, and it was wonderful. No wonder Cinderella was   
ready to marry the prince after just one dance! 

It wasn’t just how well he danced, but when he held me in his arms, he became a   
different person. He came alive like I had never seen him before; he became carefree. 

This time it was he who was glowing. I felt like a different person too. I didn’t know   
this person, this carefree person who was excited and enjoying life. 

“What are you feeling right now?” I asked. 

“Utter glee!” he replied. “I feel as if this is the moment I have been waiting for!” He   
looked deeply into my eyes “You know it is you who makes me feel this way?” 

“I am starting to see that” 

“What do you feel?” he asked 

“I feel like a princess. That my prince is here and I will live happily ever after” I knew I   
shouldn’t have said the words but it was true and they were out of my mouth before I   
considered the consequences. 

We looked at each other knowing that we wanted so much more than what we had.   
Knowing that this was a turning point for us, knowing we couldn’t deny our feelings any   
longer. At that moment, the enormity of the situation was lost in the feelings we had for   
each other. We didn’t have to say anything; we just knew things were going to change. 

“I don’t want to share you with these people anymore. Let’s go” He took my hand and   
without even saying goodbye to anyone, led me through the party guests and out into the   
waiting limo. Crowds of people swarmed around us as Benedict shielded me with his   
arms. He was so protective. 

“You okay?” he asked. “Yes. A little shaken by the crowds but okay” I smiled to show   
him I was alright because I knew he was worried. We then sat in silence, each of us   
afraid to say what we were feeling and trying to process what this all meant. We didn’t   
want to break the moment. Was I really about to give myself to this man? Was I really   
about to break my marriage vows? After my discussion with Julien earlier today, I   
wasn’t sure what was left of our marriage anyway. We no longer had trust; he stopped   
seeing me as a woman and only as a house mate. The marriage had been in trouble long   
before I became friends with Benedict. This relationship just forced us to face it.


	26. At Last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle and Benedict have the night they have been waiting for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally the smut you have been waiting for. I hope it lives up to your expectations.

When we got home, Benedict led me up the stairs and into his bedroom. This time I   
didn’t object. I was feeling the same as he was. My desire for him was overwhelming,   
but it wasn’t just physical desire, there was emotional desire. I wanted to be close to him   
in a way that matched the intensity of the feelings I felt. I wanted him, every part of him. 

As we stood there at the side of the bed, he reached down and tilted my chin upwards so   
my gaze met his. It seemed like time stopped at that moment, that we were the only two   
people in the world. Slowly he reached towards me and I towards him, until our lips met   
for the first time. I had kissed many other men in my life but never did it feel like this.   
Soft and passionate were his lips. It was like he was reaching into the depths of my soul.   
My mouth moved softly over his as I wanted to taste every last tiny piece of him. Slow   
and deliberate were our actions, we wanted to savor it all. 

His lips then moved from my mouth to my cheeks and around the nape of my neck. A   
thousand tingles went up my spine with the feel of his warm breath on my skin. His lips   
continued to make a trail from my neck down towards the top of my dress, along the edge   
of the neckline which plunged between my breasts. He stopped and looked up at me as   
if asking my permission to go ahead. I nodded and he gently pulled open the lone strap   
of my gown, the strap that was all that was standing between us. The gown fell off my   
shoulders and onto the floor. 

He stood there staring at me, making me feel shy and awkward. This was a feeling I   
hadn’t had in a long time. Sensing this, he said “don’t be shy. You are so beautiful I just   
wanted to take you all in.” He scooped his arms around me, gently lifting me up and   
placed me on his bed. Sitting down beside me he said “I told you, you were the woman I   
wanted to share this bed with” his voice was low and extremely vulnerable. 

“And I want to share it with you” I replied. “More than I have ever wanted anything   
else”. I sat up as I wanted to help him out of his clothes. I had imagined what this would   
feel like and I wanted to be part of every moment of this night. I reached out and   
unbuttoned the top button of his shirt, my hands trembling. I was acting like it was my   
first time. The second button opened, revealing the golden brown of his chest under the   
crisp white shirt. The third and fourth buttons gave way, to uncover the delicious curves   
of his chest down towards the hardness of his abs. He was like a god. I removed the   
shirt and let my hands wander over this magnificent chest. This was enough to put me in   
heaven. How was I ever going to handle more? 

He stood up, slowly unbuttoned his pants and let them fall to the floor. “Like what you   
see?” he grinned as he noticed me staring. His black underwear hugged his curves like   
they were painted on, with his desire for me clearly visible. 

“How could you tell?” I grinned. 

“Hang on my darling, it gets even better” 

Could this man get any sexier? He didn’t even have to touch me as this slow unveiling   
had raised my temperature significantly. 

He laid himself down beside me on the bed; Kissing my lips again with the same passion   
as before. As he slowly continued down my chest, he deftly opened the closure on my   
bra, letting my breasts out where they longed to be. He softly put his mouth over one,   
kissing it ever so softly. My insides instantly turned to jelly. This man could have   
anything he wanted! He took my other breast into his mouth and began to suckle it with   
such tenderness it made me want to scream out with desire. Oh my god! 

His mouth and tongue were experts at the art of seduction. He had me squirming around   
in seconds as my body tried to take in the rapture of his mouth. But it did not stop there.   
His tongue began tracing its way down my chest where he dropped butterfly kisses   
around my stomach. The kisses went lower and lower until they reached the top of my   
panties. 

“These panties are very beautiful on you” he said, but they will look even better on the   
floor! With that he used his teeth to remove them from my body and I lie there   
completely naked in front of him. 

“You are so gorgeous. I’m sorry I can’t stop staring” 

“Don’t be sorry” I whispered. “I love when you look at me that way” “I feel like you are   
a bit overdressed though Mr. Sexy” as I reached out to remove his underwear. I was not   
disappointed by what I saw. He was magnificent from top to bottom. 

“Happy now?” he asked 

“Very. Now it’s my turn to stare!” 

His mouth dropped to where my panties had been. His tongue expertly made its way   
between my legs. Placing kisses on the insides of my thighs before allowing his tongue   
to enter between them. He pleasured me in ways I never knew possible. I couldn’t   
contain my exuberance as my body danced beneath his touch. Electric shocks were   
going through my body as a rate that would bring me to ecstasy at any moment. 

“Benedict!” I screamed. “My god, I can’t control myself!” 

“Let yourself go my dear, let it go. Give yourself to me” 

His words put the flames into overdrive as the release took over my body. 

He did not stop there however, as this only excited him more. He drank everything from   
me that I had to give. “You taste so delectable” he said. 

“Now that I have you warmed up, it’s time to play!” He smiled his most devilish grin as   
he rolled me over and started laying kisses on the roundness of my bottom. “Rest for a   
moment darling as you will need your strength!” 

After only a brief moment, his tongue once again found its way between my thighs,   
reigniting the flame that was so temporarily put out. After several more moments of pure   
rapture, he flipped me back over and thrust himself into me with all the passion he had   
been holding back. We both had wanted this for a long time and it showed in our   
movements. Denying it only made it that much stronger. As we gave ourselves   
permission to let go and fully commit to each other, the intensity of our desire turned into   
the intensity of our love making. We continued to bring each other to the heights of   
ecstasy over and over culminating in total collapse into each other’s arms several hours   
later.


	27. The Afterglow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a blissful night Danielle has to face the reality of her situation.

As we lay together still reeling from the roller coaster of emotions and physical   
acrobatics we had just performed, I felt as if the world had suddenly made itself right. I   
was at peace and felt such joy that was difficult to put into words. I was scared that   
perhaps I was the only one who felt this way, but I didn’t have to wait long to find out.   
Benedict turned to look at me and I saw tears in his eyes! 

“You have made me both whole and broken at the same time, my love” he said. I have   
never felt such desire as I did for you and it’s because I was making love with my heart   
and not just my body! For the first time I felt like this was where I was meant to be and   
with the woman I was meant to be with. I cannot imagine ever feeling this way about   
another woman” 

“Oh Benedict! I pulled him close to me and kissed the tears from his eyes. “Never before   
have I felt this way either. I feel at peace, and that my world is finally complete. What   
have you done to me?” I grinned. We lay in each other’s arms, not wanting to move, not   
wanting to disturb the closeness we were feeling. 

Then suddenly another alarming thought came abruptly to my mind- the kids! “What   
time was it?” I cried as I scrambled to find a clock. 

“Whoa, it’s okay” he said. It’s only 4am. The kids are still asleep, they won’t know   
what happened.” It was like he had read my mind. 

“Oh good; that’s the last thing I need right now. I don’t want to spoil this perfect   
moment by dealing with them.” 

“Perfect is it?” he asked smiling 

“Absolutely!” I replied, with a smile as large as his. 

“I better get back to my own bed now.” 

“5 more mins?” he pleaded with those puppy dog eyes! 

“5 more mins will lead to much more than 5 mins and you know it! I smirked. 

”Ah you know me so well” he said. 

“Well I certainly know you much better now than I did yesterday” I grinned. 

“Yes I guess you do” 

I leaned over and gave him one last kiss for the night, got up and put on his robe and   
made my way to the door. “You’ll have to come get this back from me tonight!” I teased   
and headed back to my room. 

Once there I snuggled into bed, still glowing from the night we shared. Just when I   
thought I could never be happier, reality came back to bite me with a vengeance! 

I was an adulterer! I had just cheated on my husband! 

My stomach immediately turned sour as I thought about what I had done. It wasn’t really   
regret that I was feeling, because I could never regret the night I just had! It was anxiety,   
anxiety at the thought of how this would hurt Julien. Anxiety over what this would do to   
the children. Anxiety over how I was going to deal with this. I made my bed and now I   
had to lie in it. I can’t excuse what I did, I knew what I was doing and I did it fully   
knowing what the consequences would be. That didn’t make it any easier; however, to   
face the music. 

Sheer exhaustion eventually won over my racing mind and I fell asleep.


	28. The Events of the Night Before

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kids pounce on Danielle with questions about her night but she had questions of her own for them.

The next thing I knew I woke up to two shining faces peaking in on me. 

“Good morning Mom!” The both said at the same time. 

“Good morning” I managed to get out. My mouth wasn’t fully awake. “What time is   
it?” I asked 

“Its 9am sleepy head. Time to get up.” Alex said. “Have a late night partying did you?” 

“Yes we did. It was amazing. I felt like a princess as we danced around the ballroom in   
my fancy dress. So many people wanted to know who I was. Being there with Benedict   
I was the center of attention” 

“I’m sure you were!” Alex said. 

“Is Benedict up yet? TJ asked. 

“I don’t know honey. Why don’t you go see if his door is open? If it’s not open don’t   
make any noise, okay?” 

“Yes Mom, I’ll be quiet.” 

After TJ left, Alex snuggled in beside me. She was ready to interrogate. 

“So Mom, spill the beans! What happened, who did you get to meet, did Benedict kiss   
you?” 

“Whoa, Missy, one thing at a time. No Benedict didn’t kiss me, we are just friends   
remember. I met a lot of his friends” I went on to name all of the people I had met. 

“The most exciting part was how his fans related to me. He introduced me to them on the   
red carpet on our way in. Told them I was his friend Danielle from Canada and all of a   
sudden they were waving at me and welcoming me to London. It was amazing!" 

“My Mom is a celebrity!” she squealed. “I have to email the girls and tell them.” 

“There were lots of photos I’m afraid, so I am sure you will get to see everything.” 

Just then TJ and Benedict showed up at my door. Benedict was still in a robe, a different   
robe though, since I still had his. Thankfully Alex didn’t look close enough to notice. 

“Hey guys” I said. “Did TJ wake you up? 

“No I was awake, I had a hard time sleeping last night.” He grinned. “Something kept   
me awake for quite a while!” 

“That’s too bad”, I grinned. “I slept like a baby!” 

“I am famished however, lets head down for some breakfast” Benedict said 

“Sounds great to me” TJ replied and we all headed down to the kitchen for some food. 

At breakfast, it was my turn to interrogate. 

“TJ, how as your night with Benedict’s parents?” 

“Great Mom. Wanda and Tim are awesome.” He saw the look on my face and continued   
“they told me to call them that!” 

“Ok if they said it was alright” 

“I’m sure it was. Mom and Dad are very informal” Benedict added. 

“We played games and sang songs and they told me stories about when Benedict was my   
age!” TJ went on. 

“Oh they did, did they? I’ll have to have a little chat with Mom!” He pretended he was   
mad but we could see him giggling behind his frown. 

“And Miss Alex? I left you last night in the company of a very handsome young man.   
What exactly did you do, and I want details young lady!” I said. I needed to remember I   
wasn’t the only one who probably had a romantic night last night. 

“Mom! Don’t embarrass me!” she demanded. “We had a nice night. Mac took me to   
Leister Square to see all the sights, if you must know, and then we got some ice cream.” 

“That sounds nice. Was he a gentleman?” I asked knowing it would make her   
uncomfortable. 

“Yes Mom, nothing happened if that’s what you mean!” she said. “He is very nice and   
thoughtful. I had a good time” 

“Well it looks like he had a good time too.” Benedict said looking at his phone. “He just   
texted me to ask what we were doing today and if he could come back by. Shall I turn   
him away Alex?” he said devilishly. 

“Don’t you dare!” She jumped at him. Then she realized he was kidding and she hit him   
with the cushion sitting on the chair. 

“Now you know what it’s like having a teenager in the house” I said. “And this is calm   
compared to some days” 

“Seems like fun to me. Never had any sisters in the house, so this is all new to me. Okay.   
I’ll tell him to come over around 11. That should give us enough time to get dressed and   
decide what to do for the day. He said. 

“Sounds good. I know I need a shower to wake up!” I replied. 

So we all went our separate ways to get ready for the day.


	29. Best Shower Ever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict finds a way to spend more "quality" time with Danielle

As I headed into my bedroom, the events of the night before still swirled around inside   
my head. The fantasy I had never dared to dream had some true, I had been Benedict’s   
and he was mine. Even if it was only one night, it was worth it. I hated to admit it but as   
much as I should regret the fact that I did just break my marriage vows and cheated on   
the man I have loved for twenty years, I didn’t regret a thing. I knew in my heart that I   
would make the same choice all over again. It wasn’t just the physical aspect of it,   
because if that was all then yes I would have regretted it. But, there was so much more   
than physical, I truly loved this man. While I felt that he loved me too, it didn’t even   
really matter. During our night together he cared about me as if he loved me and that   
alone was enough to satisfy me. 

Standing in the most beautiful marble shower I had ever seen, I enjoyed the feel of the   
water flowing over every inch of me. I closed my eyes so I could concentrate on the   
sensation of the water and the words to one my favorite songs came softly out of my   
mouth. A shower never felt so good. All of a sudden, my skin came alive with the sensation  
of kisses on my shoulders and back of my neck! Almost jumping out of my   
skin, I turned to find that Benedict, in all his naked glory, had joined me in the shower. 

“Hello Luv. Did I scare you?” he teased. 

“Yes but in a very nice way!” I replied. 

That was all I had time to say as his mouth covered mine in a ravenous fashion. The   
electricity between us was supercharged as I felt my body instantly respond to his touch. 

He turned me around and pulled me close to him. I could feel his hardness pressed   
against me making it clear what he had in mind. He lathered his hands with soap and   
began washing my breasts. All I could do was stand there against him, helpless to do   
anything except respond to his caresses as gentle moans escaped my lips. His hands still   
frothy with soap made their way lower down my stomach and then reached between my   
legs. My moans got increasing louder as he once again took my body on a pleasure ride. 

Wanting to reciprocate the pleasure he was giving to me, I turned around and dropped to   
my knees. I needed to see what he tasted like, what he felt like in my mouth. This time it   
was he who was moaning as I took in all of him. Watching him move around in ecstasy   
was my reward as I was pleased that I could make him quiver the same as he had done to   
me. 

He then lifted me up, pinned me against the wall and entered me all in one orchestrated   
movement. I felt shockwaves shoot through my body as I moved with him in perfect   
motion. Our rhythm was that of a duet, moving together in perfect harmony until finally   
crashing together as we reached our final release. We then collapsed in each other’s   
arms as we sank down into the water of the shower trying to catch our breath. 

“Not sure this shower really got me that clean” I teased. 

“Not likely but I do hope it was more fun!” he laughed. 

“Fun doesn’t begin to describe it my darling. I can’t think of a more enjoyable way to   
shower!” I replied. But then I had to know, “How did you get in? The door was   
locked!” 

“What you don’t know is that I had a door put in between the two bedrooms in the closet.   
I anticipated that someday, my wife and I might want separate rooms but that we may   
need access to each other’s. You know for moments like these” he grinned 

“You do think of everything don’t you? I’m not sure if I admire that or if I am a little   
scared.” I teased. “So how do we now go on acting normally?” The kids are surely   
going to know something is going on. I can’t keep from blushing when I look at you, and   
you seem to have that silly grin on your face 24/7!” 

“We’ll just have to have as much sex as we can until we wear off my grin and your blushing” he said. 

‘Not sure that would even be possible” I said as I reached over and kissed that beautiful   
face once again. 

“Well we will have to think of something” 

“Right now you need to go back to your own room and let me know take a proper   
shower.” I said. 

“If I must, but remember what this was like because to me it felt like something we   
should definitely do again” he said. 

“Oh don’t worry; I wouldn’t be able to forget it even if I tried!” I said and pushed him out   
of the shower with a smile.


	30. Finding Time for each Other

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben comes up with a way to spend more time together but Danielle is starting to think about Julien.

After my shower, I was heading downstairs when Benedict stopped me. 

“It’s is going to be so difficult to want to spend time together without tipping everyone  
else off as to what is happening. We only have a few days left before you need to return  
home. We have to figure out a way to do it.” Benedict started thinking of how we could  
make this work. After a few minutes, he got this evil look in his eyes. 

“I’ve got it. How do you think the kids would feel about spending some time with my  
parents in Paris?” he asked 

“Paris? Okay now I am jealous, I’ve never been to Paris. The kids would love it. How  
would we convince them to stay without us? TJ would be okay but Alex would be  
suspicious I think” I replied 

“We’ll we could all go to Paris, and then pretend that one of my friends has become ill  
and I need to come back to see them. I will be very upset and you won’t want to leave  
me alone, so you come with me to keep me company. That way you get to see Paris and  
then we can sneak back a day early to be all by ourselves! How does that sound?” 

“That might work. If it were only 1 day early they would likely be okay.” 

“Tonight at dinner I will bring up the Paris trip. Mom and Dad are planning to come to  
supper again if that is okay with you. I’ll have my assistant call and book us a hotel.” 

“Sounds like a plan.” I said. 

Then it hit me, what were we doing? What was I doing, carrying on like I wasn’t a  
married woman? Making plans to sneak away to further my affair. What happened to  
the straight-laced woman I used to be? The one who would never dream to do the things  
I have been doing, and doing them by lying to my children and husband. 

Benedict saw my mood instantly change. “What’s the matter my darling?” he asked 

Tears started pouring down my cheeks. “How can I be so cavalier about this, when I  
have a husband at home that I am totally disregarding?” I cried. 

“Oh darling” he said as he reached out to hold me, “I know this isn’t ideal. I would love  
to do nothing more than share our love with the world, but sometimes things don’t  
happen the way you want them to and you have to make the best of what you have. Fate sometimes steps in when logic and reasoning fail and I believe this is what this is-Fate! I  
feel it in my bones that we are meant to be together. I’m not discounting the love you  
have for Julien and your marriage, but can you honestly say that what we feel isn’t every  
bit as important and strong as what you have with him?” “If you can say that what we  
have is less then what you have with him, then I am willing to step away.” He turned my  
head so I was looking straight into his eyes. “Can you say that?” he asked. 

“I would like to say it’s not, and then I could chalk this up to a weak moment and live  
with the consequences of my error in judgment. But, my heart won’t let me make that  
lie! It knows how I feel about you and yes, it is as real as the love I feel for Julien. I  
can’t let myself think about what it will be like when I have to leave you and return to my  
normal life. My heart aches just thinking about it.” 

“But things will be different this time” he said. “You will know what you have here with  
me and we can build on it.” Our phone calls and emails and our time on Skype will be  
that much more meaningful. We can make this work” 

When he said these words, I could almost believe them, almost believed it could happen.  
It was enough for now as I didn’t want to waste the time we had left.


	31. A Day on the Heath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A close encounter with Benedict's fans interrupts a day in the park.

That day we decided to go to the Heath with the kids. We were worried about fans, but   
Benedict said that normally he isn’t too bothered when he spends time there so we   
decided to take a chance. 

The Heath was beautiful. So many miles of grass and trees and ponds and people   
enjoying themselves everywhere we looked. The kids wanted to go for a swim so we all   
went for a dip. Benedict was a good swimmer and he helped TJ practice his technique.   
Alex enjoyed the swimming and the site seeing. She discovered that London had lots of   
good looking boys and she was happy to take in the sights. 

In the water, Benedict snuck up behind me and grabbed me by the waist, making be   
shriek. Under the water his hands made their way to my hips and he pulled me back tight   
against his body. He whispered into my ear “That bathing suit of yours is putting evil   
thoughts in my mind. I would like nothing more than to take you right here and make   
you scream my name over and over” 

“Sounds delightful” I replied. “It would put my kids into therapy for several years but it   
might be worth it!” 

He grinned a huge grin and pulled back from me. 

After a quick swim, I decided to lay out by the pond and just relax. I turned and was   
watching Benedict and the kids playing in the water. They were having a great time   
together. He seemed so happy. It would be easy to see him as a father. 

Just when I started to feel comfortable and relaxed, the moment ended as a fan discovered   
Benedict in the water. “Oh Sherlock!” they hollered. This got everyone’s attention as   
the turned to see what was going on. “Wow its Benedict Cumberbatch!” someone else   
yelled. People started jumping into the water and crowding around Benedict and the   
kids. TJ got this panicked look on his face as he didn’t know what was happening. My   
maternal instincts kicked into high gear and I jumped in to protect him and Alex. 

Benedict of course was used to dealing with this type of situation and he grabbed TJ so   
he wouldn’t drown. He faced his fans and thanked them for liking Sherlock. At the same   
time, he told them he was here with some family friends and some children who weren’t   
used to this attention. He asked if they could allow them a little time and then he would   
get out and sign some autographs if they wished. The crowd amazingly agreed and   
started backing away from him. 

“You are right; you do have the best fans! I expected that to be much worse than this.” I   
said. 

“It’s not over yet” he replied. “They haven’t started popping pictures or asking who you   
are yet. I am sure that’s coming” 

Sure enough, we got out of the water about 5 mins later and the swarm reformed around   
us. I tried to keep the kids off to the side but as soon as people got what they could from   
Benedict, they started to notice who I was. 

“OMG, you’re the woman who was at the BAFTA party with Benedict! What’s your   
name, who are you? Are you Benedict’s girlfriend?” So many questions were flying at   
me and there no time to answer them. 

“Yes I am Danielle and I was at the BAFTA party with Benedict. No I’m not his   
girlfriend; I am just a friend here on vacation with my kids.” 

“I bet, that’s what they all say!” someone jeered. The next thing I knew there were   
people taking our pictures. At that point Benedict came over and stood between us and   
the cameras. 

“I would ask that you respect my friend’s privacy and not take their pictures. You can   
take mine, but please leave the kids and Danielle out of them. Thanks.” He was polite   
but firm with them. He wasn’t moving. They finally took the hint and moved away from   
us. 

“Wow Mom! That was intense” Alex said. “I didn’t think they were going to back off” 

“Yes Mom” TJ said. “What was that all about?” 

“Benedict is a very popular person TJ. People want to be around him and since we are   
here they want to know why. People like to make up things in their heads instead of   
listening to the truth sometimes. It should be okay now” 

After about another 5 mins Benedict looked over at us and asked if we were ready to go.   
When I nodded yes, he told the crowd he had to leave and thanked them again for   
enjoying his work. He then walked towards us and herded us towards the car. Some   
tried to follow but most obeyed his wishes and left us alone. 

Back inside the safety of the car, Benedict apologized to the kids for the people and   
hoped they hadn’t been too scared. The both said they were okay but it was an   
experience that surprised them. 

“Unfortunately that’s the plus and minus of being famous” he said. “You are glad people   
enjoy what you do because that’s what allows you to get the biggest parts and what keeps   
you in a job you love. On the other hand though, your life is not your own.” He turned   
to Alex, “remember that young lady, for the day when you get famous!” She grinned   
when he said it. 

We headed back to relax in the comfort and seclusion of Benedict’s home. Where we   
were free to do what we wanted without anyone watching.


	32. SettingUp the Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict gets his parents to agree to go to Paris

Wanda and Tim joined us for supper again that evening. I enjoyed having them around. They were so at ease with us and seemed to really enjoy our company.

“Have you been enjoying your stay?” Tim asked.  
“Yes!” TJ eagerly replied. “This has been so awesome. Did you know we even had people wanting to take our pictures today at the park?”  
“Oh?” Wanda said, looking over at Benedict and myself. “How did that go?”  
“Actually not that badly” Benedict answered. ‘They did interrupt our time at the Heath but they actually respected my wishes pretty well”  
“Yes” I agreed, “They tried to overtake us, but Benedict was quick to intercede. They did have lots of questions though.”  
“You are lucky that was all they did. Sometimes fans can be overwhelming and don’t always take no for answer.” 

After dinner, the kids went off to do their own things and we all went to have tea and coffee on the back patio. Benedict took the opportunity to approach his parents about the idea of Paris.  
“Danielle and I were talking about what else to do while they were here. She and the kids have never been to Paris, so we were thinking we could take a small trip there. Would you two be interested in joining us?” he asked.  
“Yes please come with us,” I added. “Alex and TJ love having you around, as do I. We would enjoy it that much more if you could come with us”  
“Well, how could we refuse after a statement like that?” Tim laughed.  
“Agreed!” said Wanda. “We would love to come. I enjoy shopping in Paris so much”  
“I havent really had the need to shop since I’ve been here” I said. “Benedict did such a good job shopping for us that I couldn’t even think of anything I needed”  
“Well in Paris you and I will have to leave the kids with the boys and do some serious shopping then!” She said.   
“Sounds great to me!” Benedict and I answered at the same time, like we were thinking from the same mind. We all laughed at this.  
“It’s decided then” he said. “I’ll have my assistant make the arrangements and we can be in Paris by early afternoon tomorrow.”  
“Great, let me call the kids and let them know, they will be so excited!” 

When we told Alex and TJ about our plans they were thrilled. Alex had always wanted to see Paris and TJ was glad to go anywhere he hadn’t been before. Alex had taken French Immersion classes since Grade 1 and TJ had taken some French also so it was a great way for them to enhance their skills. 

After Wanda and Tim left to go home and pack for our trip, I got the kids settled in and their bags packed also. They were terribly excited and I knew they would have a hard time to wind down for the night. So Ben joined the 3 of us in TJ’s room to play video games. When I finally told TJ he had to get ready for bed, he asked if Benedict could read to him again. Benedict agreed and so Alex and I left to go to her room for a little mother-daughter time.

“Mom” she started, “I’ve noticed how happy you have been since we have been here. What’s making the difference?”  
“I’ve noticed you are a lot happier too, but that’s to be expected. This is an exciting trip; I would be worried if we both weren’t happier!” I replied.  
“I know it’s exciting but you also seem more at ease. Usually you are so uptight on the trips we take that you don’t seem to relax much.”

“Well that’s true; but, one of the main reasons I don’t normally relax is because I am usually the planner, the person responsible for ensuring we get to do everything on our list and make the most of our time. This time, it’s not my job; Benedict is taking care of everything so I can relax.” I didn’t bother saying that it was nice having someone else take charge and make me feel at ease. I always seem to be the one shouldering all the responsibilities at home. Julien hardly ever took on any decision making other than for our finances; he always left everything to me and it puts a lot of stress on me.

“Well I’m glad to see you enjoying yourself.” she said.   
“And I am glad to see you happy too. So what about Mac, do you have any other plans to see him?”  
“Plans no? But I was hoping to hear from him today. Maybe he has better things to do” her face clouded over when she said this.  
“Don’t be like that now. I am sure he wants to be here but he probably has responsibilities of his own to take care of. You like him don’t you?” I was curious to see what she would say since he always changed the subject whenever I had asked her about boys in the past.  
“He’s nice” she said. “We do have fun together” she was blushing when she said it.  
“Have you kissed him?”  
“Mom!”  
“Have you?” I wasn’t letting this one go.  
“Yes” she said.   
“And?” “Was this your first kiss?”  
“It was nice and yes it was my first” and she blushed again.  
“You don’t have to be shy about talking to me about boys, I was your age once you know and whether they are boys or men, they all affect us in the same way. A kiss is something very special between 2 people and the first one is always the best. It is exciting when you touch lips for the time. No matter how many boys you kiss in your life, the first time you and he kiss will always be special”

“Is that how you feel about Benedict?” she asked  
“That he is special? Yes. But I’m his friend and I save my kisses for your father”.   
I was expecting to be struck down by lightening for lying to her that way. I hated to do it and I was finding it harder to do. I didn’t have a choice though. She was too young for me to burden her with this secret, she wouldn’t understand and it wouldn’t be fair to her as it would put her in a position to have to take sides. I didn’t want that to happen.

“I’m glad you like Mac and I he likes you too. I can tell when a boy is interested and he is definitely interested. We will have to see if we can invite him over again before we leave”  
“That would be great Mom. Thanks!”  
“Now get to bed and get your sleep so you can enjoy Paris tomorrow!”  
“I will Mom. Love you. Good night”  
“Love you too dear. Good night”

I headed off to my room, wanting to get a good night’s sleep. This trip was everything I wanted it to be, but it was exhausting. I climbed into bed and found that as tired as I was that I couldn’t sleep. All I could do was think about Benedict lying in his bed in the next room. His chiseled features bronzed from the sunlight, his muscular chest firm but soft to the touch, his marvelous head full of black curls that just begged to be touched; he was a god in all sense of the word. No wonder so many women wanted him and yet I was the one he was choosing to be with.

Then I started thinking about how little time we had left and how I didn’t want to waste a minute of it. As tired as I was, there would be time to sleep when we got back home. What was I doing here in this bed alone? I immediately got up and went into my closet, remembering the door into Benedict’s room. I removed my gown, wanting nothing to come between us, and made my way quietly into the room.

He seemed to be asleep and so I crept quietly over to the empty side of his bed and slipped under the covers. I then carefully slide over towards him. As I was about to reach out and touch his back, he turned over and looked at me. “Oh!” I let out a small gasp as his movement surprised me.

“Thought you’d sneak up on me did you?” he asked.   
“I thought you were sleeping”  
“How could I sleep knowing you were just on the other side of the wall from me? I could think of nothing else.”  
“Nor could I, which is why I had to come.”  
‘So glad you did darling. I enjoyed watching you walk into my room. You are so gorgeous” he said, and then reached out to kiss me in the extraordinary manner to which my lips had now become accustomed. No man was able to possess a woman by kiss alone like he could. 

Our kissing turned once again into lovemaking. Each time our bodies came together it was more enjoyable then the last. It was like they knew they belonged together, like two parts of the same whole. I felt like his body belonged to me now. I knew how to make him feel the same ecstasy that he brought to me. From his brilliant lips, to his gorgeous hips, from his rock-hard abs to his long beautiful hands, and of course his rock-hard, long and beautiful erection, the man was made to pleasure women! 

As we lie together afterwards, wrapped in each other’s arms, I began to weep.  
“Are my lovemaking skills that bad that they make you cry?” he asked  
“No my darling, I am just so happy being with you, that I don’t know what I will do when I have to return home.”  
“Don’t think about that now, we don’t want to waste the time we have being sad about what it will be like for us to be apart. I feel the same but I refuse to let those thoughts into my mind now.”  
“You’re right.” I said. “So if you want me to forget all of that then you will need to do something…to better occupy my mind!”   
“You cheeky thing! I think I can handle that.” And with that his lips found mine again and my sadness was gone.


	33. Paris

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, Wanda, Tim, Danielle, Alex and TJ spedn their first day in Paris shopping and site seeing

It was an early start to the morning as we were driving to Paris and we wanted to make the most of the day. Benedict got us a limousine again so we could all travel together and be comfortable. We stopped to get Wanda and Tim at their home. It was a very nice cottage style home, not the least bit stuffy. In fact, it was terribly cozy. I wished we could have spent more time there but Paris was calling.

The drive to Paris was extraordinarily beautiful. The English countryside had rolling green grass, littered with farm animals as far as the eye could see. There weren’t many lakes, or ponds, but when we did happen to see one, they were lovely also. The ferry over to France was exciting for the kids. It reminded me of when I was young and we would take the ferry from New Brunswick to Prince Edward Island. The sea air was refreshing and we watched for whales and other sea creatures as we went.

I noticed how excited Tim and Wanda were about this trip. Tim loved playing with TJ and Wanda was more than happy to share “Little Benedict” stories with Alex and me, much to Benedict’s pretend annoyance.  
“Your Mom and Dad really seem to be having fun with the kids” I said when Benedict and I had a second out of earshot of the others.  
“Yes, Mom and Dad always wanted grandchildren and so this is such a treat for them. Alex and TJ are such good kids that they are a pleasure to be around”  
“You know they aren’t always like this?” I teased. “But yes they are great kids. I am so proud of the people they are becoming. Unlike my parents, I make sure to tell them as much as I can. I think it’s important for their self-esteem”  
“I agree. It seems like you had a hard time when you were little. Your parents didn’t support you much it seems”  
“No, they didn’t. I got a lot of good qualities from them, but good self-esteem wasn’t one.”  
“Too bad, because I think you are pretty awesome! I bet you were amazing as a kid too.”  
“Why Mr. Cumberbatch, are you trying to flatter me into submission? I don’t think I could submit to you much more then I already have” I whispered with a grin.  
“We’ll see about that!” he said with his own evil grin. “I think maybe you underestimate me. You havent seen all my tricks yet!”  
“Ooo you tease! Bring it on!” I fired back.  
“Be careful what you wish for” he replied and then as we saw the rest of the family making their way back to us, we quickly changed the subject.

When we pulled into Paris, we went straight to our hotel to check in. As we opened the door of the limo we were greeted by a bellboy who was anxious to help us into the lobby and quick to get our belongings from the trunk. I thought Benedict’s house was nice; but this hotel looked like a castle in the middle of a city! Gold trims and tapestries were everywhere. People dressed in elegant clothing, in the middle of the afternoon. Thankfully, Wanda had warned me and we had dressed up a bit, or else we would have looked out of place. 

Benedict had gotten us a suite with 3 bedrooms and Wanda and Tim had their own room with had an adjoining door. We were starving so we ventured out to a little café that the concierge had told us about. We asked for one a little out of the way as we still had to be mindful of Benedict’s fans. Apparently French fans aren’t quite as bold as British fans, so he normally doesn’t get the same reaction in Paris as he does at home. The French Press on the other hand isn’t nearly as accommodating. No sense in setting ourselves up for disaster if we can help it.

The café was exactly what I would have expected to see in Paris. It had small tables, with candles and art on the walls. The menu had limited choices with wines, cheeses and breads taking up most of it. The kids love breads and cheeses so this was not a problem.   
Benedict ordered a very nice white wine to go with lunch. When it arrived Alex turned to me and said “You know Mom, Parisian kids start drinking wine when they are TJ’s age. I should be able to have a drink right?” she asked wishfully and started reaching for a glass.  
“Nice try, but not at lunch time. You aren’t used to drinking and I’m not about to drag a teenager with a buzz around all afternoon. Maybe at supper tonight. We’ll see.”  
“Okay” she said with disgust in her voice. “I guess that’s better than nothing”  
The whole table got a laugh out of this conversation, just as our food arrived.

After lunch, Wanda and I decided we should do our shopping. The boys wanted to venture to the canals and maybe take a boat ride. Alex decided she would rather stick with the boys then shop with us so they all headed off in one direction while Wanda and I went in the other.

“It’s so nice to have another woman to do things with” she said as we headed up the street. “I have my friends at home but it’s not the same. My daughter is far away in the US and I don’t get to see her often enough. I am enjoying the time we are spending together.”  
“Thank you Wanda. I feel the same. You and Tim have been so nice to us. I feel like I have known you all my life instead of just meeting 3 days ago.”  
“You and Benedict and the kids seem to have settled into a nice routine. Like a real family” she said tentatively.  
“It would be easy enough to do as Benedict is great, but no one could replace Julien in the kids’ eyes. He is a great father. This is just a different and exciting adventure we’re on and of course the kids love it. As do I and so does Benedict. At the end of the day though, we all know it’s not permanent and that we do have to go back to the way things were, the way they should be.”  
“I understand. You can’t fault a mother for trying though. When she sees her son this happy, she doesn’t want it to end. Okay, let’s see if we can do some damage in these boutiques” she said as we got to the first store on her “must shop” list.  
“I’m all for that” I replied. “Let the shopping begin”


	34. New Experience at the Eiffel Tower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Danielle experience a special moment at the Tower and then put their plan into action.

Wanda sure knew her shopping and we ended up with many parcels at the end of it. What I didn’t know was Benedict had given her his credit card and asked that anything we find be charged to him. I didn’t have to pay for anything. It made me a little uncomfortable to be taking so much of his money, but she assured me it would make him happy if we did. Who was I to argue? There was one secret purchase I made that Wanda didn’t know about, and I used my own money for that. It would be revealed later.

We called the limo driver to pick us up at our last store and then we went to meet the boys and Alex. They had all kinds of stories to tell us about from their trip down the river. They also had another surprise when we met them; they had picked up an extra guest. Mac was with them! He had been in Paris for another reason and when he texted Alex and found out we were here, he arranged to meet up with them.

Alex was grinning from ear to ear. Mac was good for her I thought. Every teenage girl needs that romantic excitement, that’s what being a teenager is all about. Now we were planning to head off to the Eiffel tower. We decided to wait until now as we would get to see the view in the daylight but it also would be dark very soon and we could get to see it light up. We all piled into the limo and headed off to the Tower.

The Eiffel Tower lived up to our expectations. The view from the top was spectacularly stunning. The tower itself was an architectural masterpiece. You could feel the history of the city from up at the top. TJ found it very exciting and was running around everywhere trying to take it all in. Wanda and Tim tried to keep up with him and found such delight in seeing things through his eyes. Alex, on the other hand, was looking at Mac as much as she was the view but it seemed he was doing the same.

TJ and the Cumberbatchs wondered off in one direction and Alex and Mac went off in the other. For a few moments Benedict and I were alone.  
“Ah young love” Benedict said looking towards Alex and Mac.   
“Yes to be their age again” I sighed.  
“I don’t know, I think this age is a pretty good one” he said and he leaned down to kiss me.  
“Yes I guess it is” I replied and I leaned over and returned his kiss. These kisses start off innocent enough but somehow they always seem to ignite a passion in us that we don’t see coming.

Benedict moved over behind me as we both looked out over the edge of the Tower. He began kissing the back of my neck and then reached his hands around me, caressing my breasts and then went lower between my thighs. 

My good girl conscience wanted him to stop; this was a public place after all and the kids could show up any minute. But the woman who wanted this man whenever and wherever I could get him, wasn’t about to tell him to stop. The trench coat he wore surrounded us so no one would be the wiser.

The passionate woman won out as I reached behind me to caresses him. I heard an excited moan leave his lips. He then unzipped his trousers with one hand and pulled up my skirt with the other. He slid up inside me, causing me to gasp, as he continued to move within me. The pure ecstasy growing inside made me forget where we were. All I knew is that I was part of him again and the sensation was blowing my mind!

We finished as quickly as we started, both of us satisfied and leaning into each other.   
I turned to face him and instantly fell in love with him all over again. He was looking at me like I was the most important person in the world, like I could do no wrong. That look is so powerful, that all I wanted to do was stay with him forever.

We quickly fixed ourselves up, not saying a word, but both of us grinning like the Cheshire cat. Just in time too as the Wanda, Tim and TJ were returning. I excused myself to find the washroom and snuck away. I was sure if Wanda were to see my face that she would know what we had done. I didn’t want her to think I was some kind of a tramp!

On my way to the washroom, I saw Alex and Mac together. They were standing in the beauty of the moonlit sky, at the top of the Eiffel Tower, locked in each other’s arms and sharing a kiss. I couldn’t help but wonder if Benedict and I looked the same as they did as when I looked at them I could only think about us.

When I got back we decided it was time to eat and we hurried back to the hotel to dress for dinner. Once again I felt like a princess as I got ready for the night. We ate in the hotel that night and had a fantastic meal. We looked like one big happy family except for the fact that the man in the picture wasn’t my husband or the father of the kids and the grandparents were really strangers. Other than that it all appeared terribly normal!

Alex got to have her glass of wine which gave her the giggles and made TJ look at her funny. Mac saw my concerned look and nodded as if to say “don’t worry, I’ll take care of her”

We had just ordered dessert when Benedict’s phone started to ring. He answered it and got the most worried look on his face. He was asking the person on the other end how bad it was and when did it happen. We all looked at him as we knew it was bad news. When he hung up, he told us that his close friend’s husband had been in a car accident and was on route to the hospital in London. Benedict was a great actor. I knew this was part of the plan to get us alone but even I was getting caught up in his story.

He continued to say they weren’t sure how bad it was but they were concerned he might not make it. He turned to me and asked if I would mind if he left to go to be with them. I quickly answered of course not and he said his apologies and left to get ready. I told the rest of them that I was going to go help him as I was concerned over how badly he was taking this. I told them to stay and finish their dessert and we would come back and see them when he was ready. I excused myself and followed him. 

We went upstairs and pretended to pack, but in truth we never really unpacked much as this was part of our plan. This gave us some time to snuggle and after a suitable amount of time, we went back downstairs, each of us with our suitcase.

I looked at Wanda and asked her if they would mind staying with the kids so I could go with Benedict. I whispered to her that I was worried about him and how badly he was taking this and I didn’t want him to have to travel back on his own. Wanda quickly agreed. Then I turned to the kids and asked them if they would be okay staying with Wanda and Tim. TJ had no problem and since Mac was staying for a couple more days, Alex was fine with this also.

I kissed them both good bye, told them to enjoy the rest of the trip and that I would see them at home late tomorrow night.

And with that we were off to sneak away and share some time together alone!


	35. Stolen Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle and Benedict get to spend some time alone

The ride back to London was very peaceful. We hired a car to drive us as we wanted to leave the limo for the others. We snuggled up to each other in the back seat. I was comforted by the clean smell of his cologne and the warmth of his arms. 

“I feel bad for lying to them” I said. “But I am so content right now that it seems like it was worth it”

“I agree. I don’t know when I have lied to my parents before. I just knew they would try to talk me out of it and I wasn’t about to let that happen”

Our talking was very limited as we drove along, and eventually we both fell asleep, exhausted from all the excitement of the last few days.

As we reached London, Benedict made a call and “leaked” to the press that he was on the way to the hospital to see a sick friend. When we arrived there were some cameras there trying to find out what was happening. He stopped just briefly to tell them there was friend of his in the hospital that we were going to see and then we made our way inside. The cameras would lend some authenticity to our ruse. We waited a few minutes inside and then made our way around to the back door of the hospital and snuck out to the car. This way the press would think we were still inside visiting and we could continue on our way home. 

Once we had gotten back into the car, we found we were rather giddy. The excitement of our trickery and our lack of sleep had given us the giggles. When we reached Benedict’s house, we ran inside, raced each other up to his bedroom and collapsed on the bed still laughing. 

“What is happening to us?” I asked. “We’re acting like two little kids!”   
“I know, but isn’t this just what we needed? Some time to act silly without anyone watching us?” he replied  
“True. It is very liberating knowing you don’t have to always be watching over your shoulder or saying something that will reveal your secret” I said  
“Oh and what secret is it that you are hiding?” he asked with a grin.  
“The best secret, the one I am keeping from the world, my love for a certain British heartthrob!” I countered with my own grin.  
“And what a lovely secret it is” he said as he reached over to kiss me.   
As happy as I was to finally be alone with him, I couldn’t stifle the yawn that came out of my mouth.  
“You are really tired aren’t you?” he asked.  
“I am but I don’t want to waste our time together.”  
“I would rather have you rested my dear then worn out. I’m pretty tired myself. Perhaps just being curled up in each other’s arms all night will be enough for now.” “Agreed” I said and with that we striped down to our underwear, climbed under the blankets and drifted off for a much needed sleep.

It seemed like no time at all had passed when the sunlight made its way into the window and forced my eyes open for the day. I turned over to peak at Benedict sleeping, only to be surprised by him being awake and watching me.   
‘Oh” I jumped just a little.  
“Surprised you did I?” he asked.  
“Just a bit. I thought I would get to watch you sleep but you beat me to it.”  
“Yes for once I was able to watch you. You look so peaceful when you sleep.”  
“That’s because I am so content here with you.”  
“And I with you. You know you aren’t the only one with a secret!”  
“Oh, and what would your secret be sir?” I asked.  
“That I am love with an amazing Canadian woman who makes my heartthrob!”  
“You always know the right thing to say don’t you?”  
“I only say what I feel darling”  
“And I like the way you feel, darling” I said back to him and I ran my hand down his chest.  
“Oh is that how you want to be is it?” he asked. “Two can play at that game”

Once again I was in his arms, tasting his kisses and feeling his desire. Once again, my own desire rose to meet his. It was like there was a pilot light for our passion that never went out, but was only dimmed from time to time. It kept hidden until a brief brushing of our lips, or a soft caress, ignited the flames and then allowed them to build higher and higher. Mouth to skin contact was electrifying, hand to skin contact made one of us soft and one of hard at the same time. When he thrust into me, my world fell apart with the most earth shattering sex I had ever had. Each time was like the first time!

Afterwards as we lie tangled together it felt different. We didn’t have to worry about getting up quickly before the kids came looking for me. I didn’t have to sneak back into my room so no one knew. This time we were free to be with each other out of the reproachful eyes of others. I felt calm like never before and I could tell Benedict felt it too.

“Wow” he said. Just when I thought that couldn’t get any better, it did!”  
“I think it was the knowing we were alone that allowed us to be free with each other.”  
“If that’s what freedom is like, I think we need to tell the world” he joked.  
“Someday, darling, someday perhaps.” I said it because I truly hoped we could be someday. I didn’t know how but I knew what I wanted.  
“Someday can’t come soon enough for me”


	36. Like Uncaged Animals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One Heavenly Day

That day was one I will never forget. We acted like a couple of teenagers in love who didn’t know what to do with each other. We had breakfast brought to us in bed while we talked about what was important to each of us. Benedict still didn’t know as much about me as I did of him, so he asked me a lot of questions about what I was like as a child. When I had explained how I always felt like an outsider looking in and how I never felt I was good enough, he was quick to tell me that whatever I went through, it made me the brilliant woman I was now, the woman he loved. He sure got brownie points for that one!

After breakfast and a shower—why run two different showers when one would do- we headed out for the day. We knew we were taking a chance going out in public, so we tried to hit some spots no one would be looking for us. We were hoping people would still think we were at the hospital. I made a quick call to the kids to see how they were making out and they were having a blast. Wanda and Tim were doing a great job of keeping them entertained so I had no worries that they were missing me. 

We decided to head out on the water. Benedict had a friend with a boat so we went off for a sail. I had never been on a sailboat so I was a little nervous. Once I got my sea-legs it was amazing. The true beauty of the water cannot be described. The clear blue, the rippling waves and the sun dancing off the top of it, was like a painting. We sat on the bow of the boat and looked out over the ocean. It wasn’t too long before we saw some porpoises playing in the water. Swimming and jumping in the air, like they didn’t have a care in the world. That was how I felt too, as free as they were. 

I had never been so spoiled. Benedict had arranged everything. We had some chocolate covered strawberries, some cheese and crackers and prosciutto, a marvelous white wine and the most decadent red velvet cheesecake I had ever eaten. 

“You got all of my favourites didn’t you?” I asked.  
“It pays to listen when a lady talks” he grinned. “You never know when you may be able to use her words to your advantage”  
“And what advantage would that be exactly?”  
“Getting you all happy, plying you with liquor and then having my way with you!” he replied.  
“Oh baby, you could have fed me broccoli and I still would have let you have your way with me!” I teased.  
“Now you tell me! Next time I’ll save my money and just put you over my shoulder and drag you off to bed” we both laughed at the mental picture this created. I was still laughing when he actually bent over and slung me over his shoulder! 

‘Benedict!” I squealed as he started walking towards to steps going down into the boat.  
“Oh you thought I was kidding?” he said as he took me downstairs into the bedroom.

Sometimes our love making was passionate and urgent, but today was different. It was as loving and caring as the first time our bodies met. His kisses and his touch were filled with emotion as if this was the last time we would be together. I too, took my time and enjoyed every last sensation, every last tingle as I mapped out his body with my hands. I wanted to feel every inch of him so I would be able to keep it in my memory for when we had to be apart. It seemed like hours before we could go no more, before our bodies exploded into the sweetest release any two people could produce. 

I cried like a baby. I cried because of the sheer emotion of what we had just done, but I also cried because I knew that this would be one of the last times we would be together.   
When I looked at him, I saw the same tears of joy and agony on his face. We held onto each other for a long time, neither one of us wanted to be the first to let go. It was like we thought we could stay together forever if we just didn’t let go. 

Eventually we had no choice as the boat was making its way back to shore. We pulled ourselves back together and when we left the boat, we walked arm in arm back to the car, neither of us saying a word. This was to be our last night in London and the thought of leaving tomorrow was more then we could bear.

We had very little time when we got back before Wanda, Tim and the kids got back. They asked how Benedict’s friend was doing and we were happy to let them know he was going to make a full recovery. Somehow I’m not sure Wanda was buying any of it. She had that twinkle in her eye that all mothers have when they know their kids are not telling the truth; but they are willing to let them get away with it anyway.


	37. The Last Supper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One final evening out in London

We had decided for our last night, that we would go out somewhere special and elegant for supper. Wanda and Tim decided to leave us on our own for supper and instead said they would drop round tomorrow to say their goodbyes. Alex did ask if Mac could join us for supper and I couldn’t say no. I still had Benedict so I couldn’t take Mac away from her.

So we all dressed in our fanciest clothes. Benedict as usual looked incredibly handsome in a Spencer Hart tux and a crisp white shirt and bow tie. TJ also looked very handsome in a tux that matched Benedict’s and Mac had on a Hugo Boss tux but in Navy instead of black. Alex was dressed in a yellow Vera Wang gown that was knee length but had a sheer train down the back to her ankles. She looked like an angel and I wasn’t the only one to notice. Mac could barely take his eyes off of her as they made their way to the car. I had chosen a Vera Wang gown also in a brilliant coral color. It too was shorter in the front but unlike Alex’s gown, it came up to a V, allowing my legs room to move around.  
I guess I looked pretty good as well since both Benedict and Mac commented on my gown and TJ told me that Alex and I looked like princesses. 

As Benedict helped me into the car, we whispered in my ear that as good as the gown looked on me, he would be glad to take it off of me later! Oh my! This time he drove, which was the first time he had driven since we had been here. We took his jaguar and Mac drove the kids in his car. I was actually glad there were photographers outside the restaurant when we got there as I wanted lots of pictures in order to remember this night.

Benedict had chosen a restaurant that was frequented by many celebrities. The owner knew him and made sure we had the best table in the house. As we walked in, Benedict said hello to many of the people inside. A few actors I recognized, but many of the faces were unknown to us…until that is Alex saw Adele and just about tripped on her gown. Benedict had met Adele before and took us to her table to Alex could meet her. 

“Just when I thought this night couldn’t get any better, then we meet Adele!” Alex squealed with delight.  
As we sat at our table, we had people drop by to see us as well. Alice Eve was there with her boyfriend and they stopped to say hello. ‘Benedict” she said, “these don’t look like your normal dinner companions. Please introduce me won’t you?”

“Sure Alice. This is my friend Danielle who is visiting from Canada. This is her daughter Alex and her son TJ and I think you know David’s nephew Mac?”

“Yes I do, nice to see you Mac. And welcome to London for the rest of you. Alex you are such a beautiful young woman, are breaking some hearts while you are here?” she asked.  
“Only mine” Mac replied and Alex blushed about three shades of red.

“Danielle, please tell me how you managed to get this one out of the house? He never comes here unless it is for a cast party of some sort.”  
“I think he was tired of having us take up space in his home and thought it best to get us out of the house. I have to say Miss Eve that I enjoyed your acting not just in Star Trek but also in Starter for 10.”

“It’s Alice. Goodness I didn’t know anyone was watching that old movie these days but thank you Danielle” “Well I will let you get on with your dinner. Nice meeting you all and nice to see you Benedict” and with that she was off to her table.  
“What a world wind she is!” I exclaimed.  
“That’s Alice. She’s been like that ever since I met her” Benedict explained.

We wined and dined the rest of the evening. Even TJ enjoyed the fancy dinner although he was a little disappointed that there was no pizza on the menu. After dinner we wanted to walk outside and take in the lights, but by then the crowds had heard that Benedict was here and so his fans were waiting for him outside. Being always the gentleman, he asked if I would mind if he signed a couple of autographs on our way out. How could I say no?

So we stopped and as he was signing, people were asking us questions as well. They wanted to know how we liked London and how was it spending time with Benedict. The kids thought this was great as they liked being the center of attention. I wasn’t as sure as I was scared they might ask a question we didn’t want to answer. We stayed about 10 mins and then Benedict told them we had to finish our evening. Although they were disappointed, once again they didn’t make a fuss and we got away cleanly.

Back at the house, Alex and Mac decided to go outside for a walk around the gardens. It was their last few moments together. They planned to Skype with each other so it would make it easier to be apart. 

It was time for TJ to head off to bed. Benedict read to him one last time. He told TJ how much he was going to miss reading to him. “You’ll need to come to visit our house” TJ said. I would love to show you my room at home. It’s not as awesome as this one but it is pretty cool.”  
“I would love to mate.” Benedict said. “Maybe I can find a way to come. Now off to bed as you have a big day tomorrow.”  
“Night Benedict, night Mom”  
“Night sweetie” 

“I better go get Alex now”. Rather than interrupting her and causing embarrassment for both of us, I decided to text her instead. About 5 mins later she showed up at the door, with tears all down her face.

“Oh sweetie!” I wanted so badly to comfort her as I knew exactly how she was feeling. She was feeling the same as I would be tomorrow when I had to leave Benedict.  
I reached my arms out to comfort her. Benedict came around the corner and saw what was happening.   
“Alex” he said, “If it’s any consolation, I know he is feeling the same pain you are right now.   
“Thank you Benedict, but unfortunately that doesn’t help. I know he’s hurting too. I just want to be alone Mom.”  
“Okay honey, head up to bed. Just make sure to finish your packing before you go to sleep.”  
“Don’t worry about all your clothes, I’ll have them packed up and sent to you so you don’t have to carry them all home.” Benedict said.  
“Good night honey” I reached up to kiss her goodnight and then Benedict gave her a hug and away she went.

Benedict and I looked at each other as we knew our time was coming, the time when we would have to say our goodbyes. We headed upstairs.   
“Benedict, I want tonight to be special. I need a little time to get ready.”   
“Okay my darling, I will be waiting for you”  
I headed off to my room to prepare for what we knew was our last time together.


	38. Is this the End?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle and Benedict leave it all on the table knowing this could be their last night together

went into my room and prepared a bath. I soaked in a milk bath in the tub to make sure I was soft and silky. After my bath, I opened the surprise package I had bought in Paris. Inside was a beautiful lace nightgown. It was pale pink with lace trim and an extremely low plunging neckline. The material was thin and gauzy, creating a bare covering. Bare enough to be seductive but still leave a little bit to the imagination. I wanted our last night together to be perfect. 

After fixing my hair into soft ringlets, and applying my makeup sparsely but elegantly, I was ready. I picked up my phone and called Benedict. “Are you ready for me, my darling?”  
“More than ready” he said. “I thought I was going to go crazy waiting here for you.”  
“Good things come to those who wait my dear. I’ll be there in a moment.”  
I put a dab of perfume on my neck, put on a pair of stilettos and made my way into his room through the hidden doorway. As I entered the room, I heard a gasp escape his lips. 

“Just when I thought you couldn’t get any more beautiful, you float into this room looking like a goddess! Wait right there. Don’t come any closer.” I stopped in my tracks. What was wrong?  
“I need to take a picture so I can look at you like this whenever I am lonely and missing you.” He took out his camera and began taking pictures. I flirted with the camera and had fun with it. I normally would be shy, but with him I was relaxed.

“You know I am going to need something of you to remember, too” I said.  
“Okay” he said, go ahead and snap some pictures. He stepped out of bed wearing nothing. “Wow, that is a beautiful sight but if I take these pictures, I won’t be able to get them printed!”  
“How is this then?” he asked as he held a hat over his pelvis.  
‘That’s perfect” I said. And I proceeded to snap some fun pictures of the charming Mr. Cumberbatch. 

“Okay enough pictures” he said as he reached out to me. “My eyes are full but my arms are empty. I can’t look at you anymore without touching you!” 

We stood there face to face, only inches apart. The air was charged with the electricity that flowed between us. He gave me that look, the one my heart ached for. I returned the look with all the passion I had inside of me. He reached out to kiss me, like he had many times before, but this was different. It was gentle yet passionate all at the same time. His mouth was demanding, yet there was a delicateness about the way he pressed his lips to mine and how his tongue caressed my mouth. I returned his kisses with the same passion. We knew this would be the last time we would making love for a long time, perhaps ever. He hands caressed my breasts through the silkiness of the nightgown and instantly my insides began to ache. My hands wandered his face, my fingertips tracing the outline of those amazing cheekbones. He lowered his mouth to my breast and I almost collapsed from the weakness I felt. My hands wrapped around his back, feeling every inch of him. The firm outline of his tight buttocks that my hands couldn’t get enough of.

He lifted me up and placed me on the bed- his mouth returning to my breasts. At the same time, his hand searched under my gown, looking to find my weakness between my thighs. It didn’t take long before I was at his mercy. Wanting more and begging him to stop at the same time. When I thought I could take it no more, I rolled over onto him. Kissing that face and neck that haunted my dreams. Caressing and kissing the chest that had been sculpted by the gods. 

It was my turn to make him beg as my tongue found its way to the spot that his hat had been covering moments before. I must admit that I had learned a thing or two about how to please a man as he instantly started moaning with delight. I teased him in every way I could. I wanted him to remember the touch of my lips and tongue on his body. I wanted to ruin him for any other woman as he had ruined me for any other man. I sent his body to the highest heights and then let it fall, only to raise it up again. After several times I could sense he could take no more as he grabbed me back up on top of him. 

I placed him inside me and let my body take over from my mind. Throwing me around and under him, he wanted to take control and I was ready to let him. This time he took us both to peak of passion so many times, I couldn’t keep track. My mind was no longer in control, my body was the master. When we thought we would both explode, we allowed ourselves to reach the ultimate pleasure and then collapsed together on the bed.

Neither of us spoke for several minutes. We just lay together in a heap of exhaustion and contentment. If that was to be our last time together, we left nothing out. It could never be better than it was tonight.

When we were able to speak, Benedict looked at me not with passion but with sadness. “I love you” he said. “I really do. No one else has ever made me feel like this.”  
“And I love you too!” I said. “I didn’t mean for all of this to happen, I couldn’t stop it.  
“I know you didn’t. I didn’t either.” “No one will believe us though.”  
“No especially not Julien. How do you tell the man you have been married to for 18years that you have fallen in love with another man? I don’t think I can do it.”  
“Why do we have to? He said.  
“What do you mean?” I asked  
“Well we know we can’t be together permanently until the kids are older. They need their mother and father together. So maybe we don’t tell anyone anything. We keep this our little secret.”  
“But Benedict I can’t stay away from you for that long.”  
“You won’t have to. I can go visit you and you can sneak away and be with me. We can find a way to be together.”  
“I don’t know Benedict, I don’t know if it can work”  
“It’s worth a try though isn’t it? All I know is I can’t give you up. Being with you part time is better than not being with you at all”  
“Okay”  
“Okay?” he asked.  
“Yes. I’m willing to try it because I can’t stand the thought of being without you either.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you are enjoying the story. If you would enjoy more description in certain areas let me know. and of course Happy Birthday to the real Benedict today.


	39. Saying goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle and family have to go home. A lot of broken hearts.

When I woke up I was in my own bed alone. I could still smell Benedict’s cologne on me, his musky scent on my skin. Reality then set in, I was going home today!

I got up and showered, it wasn’t the same being in the shower alone. I kept wondering if he would sneak in again, but this time he did not. I went and woke the kids and got them up and going, then finished my packing. As promised, Benedict had someone box up our clothes and they were labeled ready to be sent home for us.

When we went downstairs for breakfast, Wanda and Tim had arrived. They had gifts for both of the kids as they said they wanted them to have something to remember them by. TJ was given a jersey from the Manchester United Soccer team with autographs from all the players on it. During the time they had spent with him, Tim had gotten him into “football” as they called it and TJ had become quite a fan. TJ thought it was great and put it on immediately. Tim had become like another grandfather to him.

For Alex, Wanda had picked out a lovely locket and inside on one side was a picture she had taken of Alex and Mac at the Eiffel Tower, and the other side had a picture of Wanda, Tim, Alex and TJ. On the back she had engraved, “We treasured our time with you, Luv W&T” .They couldn’t have picked a better gift for her. Alex hugged them both thanking them profusely. She was as fond of them as they were of her.

We finished our breakfast, got our suitcases, and headed out to the car. I turned to Wanda and Tim to say my goodbyes but I could hardly get the words out I was so choked up.

“Wanda, Tim, I want you to know how much I will miss the both of you. You are two of the kindest people I have ever met. The way you have welcomed 3 strangers into your lives and treated us like family is something I will never forget.” Tears were now spilling down my cheeks.

“Oh Danielle, luv, you and your kids are so easy to care about. You have such a beautiful soul and Alex and TJ take after their mother. I can only hope someday to have a daughter-in-law as good as you!” Wanda had tears in her eyes too now.  
“Yes dear, we are so blessed to have gotten to know you. We can easily see what drew Benedict to want to be your friend. I just hope this isn’t the last we see of you.” Tim added.  
“I hope not too. You will have to come to Canada to visit us.” I answered  
“That would be nice dear.” Wanda said as she reached out to hug me. I didn’t want to let go of her. I then gave Tim a hug and got into the car before I changed my mind.

This time Benedict sat in the back next to me. It was a quiet ride as no one wanted to talk about going home. I think TJ may have missed home and they both missed their Dad. I missed Julien too, but I was more afraid of the discussion we would have to have when we got home.

At the airport, I was prepared to say goodbye at the car, but Benedict insisted on coming in. “Aren’t you worried about fans?’ I asked.  
“They don’t have any idea that I am here and we can head for the safety of the first class lounge where they can’t get in.” Then he whispered so the kids couldn’t hear. “I can’t bear to leave you one second before I have to”. I squeezed his hand in response, not able to get any words out without crying.

Just as we were getting our luggage out, a familiar face showed up. Mac had surprised Alex by coming to the airport to say goodbye. Alex ran to give him a hug as TJ looked at her in surprise. “What’s the big fuss about?” he said. “You just saw him last night!”  
We all laughed at the innocence of his question. Then before we could get mobbed, we headed inside to the lounge. 

We still had an hour and a half before boarding so Mac, Alex and TJ went to walk around the terminal to see what was open. This gave Benedict and me a few more stolen moments together.  
“So, do you know think Julien will have a lot of questions for you when you get home?” he asked.  
“I am sure he will have some. He is so jealous.”  
“I hate that we have to keep our relationship a secret,” he said. “I want to scream out to the world how happy you make me”  
“I would love nothing but to do the same” I said. “But we know we can’t, not for now anyway”  
“So how is this going to go? Will we have a secret time when it is safe to call or text?” he asked. “You know I will want to Skype with you now because I will need to see your beautiful face”  
“And I yours. Yes we will figure something out. We managed before; we will just have to be careful now about who is around when we are talking”  
“I can’t believe you are leaving me today. Come here so I can kiss your lips one last time before the kids get back” he said.  
I leaned in and tasted those lips one more time. It was the longest kiss in the world and neither of us wanted to stop. Desperation and sadness filled the kiss as our hearts were breaking at the thought of saying goodbye. 

We should have been more careful about who was watching us as we didn’t notice the small flash that went off while we were kissing. 

I promise I will text you as soon as we get home so you will know we arrived.”  
“Good, at least I will have that much”  
“You’ll be fine. You’ll be busy at work, and running around having your picture taken and signing autographs, you probably won’t even notice were gone!” I said  
‘You don’t really believe that do you?” he said looking me directly in the eyes. “I hope you know how much it will hurt me to have you gone. The life I knew has been changed forever, for the better!” His eyes went from sadness to cheerfulness as he was speaking. 

“No, I don’t really believe that. I guess a part of me wants to though, as that way I won’t feel as badly about leaving you. I know my life won’t be the same either, in more ways than one”  
“I don’t think I’ll be the only one broken hearted on the drive home” Benedict said, looking over at Mac as the kids returned.   
“No I won’t be the only sad one on the plane either.”  
“TJ, why don’t you come sit with Benedict and me for a moment so Alex and Mac can have a few minutes together”. Alex looked over at me and mouthed the words ‘thank you”.  
So Benedict and TJ and I sat and chatted. Time was flying by and they were now announcing that we needed to make our way through security. TJ gave Benedict a big hug, Alex and Mac had their final hug and then Benedict put his arms around me for the last time. “This won’t be our last time together” he whispered, while placing a soft kiss on my cheek.  
Off we went onto the plane. Alex in tears and me doing everything I could to hold myself together. In a few short hours we would be back home.

Benedict made his way back through the airport. This time he wasn’t as lucky with the crowds. People had heard that he was in the lounge and they were waiting for him to come out. He was met with not just fans but paparazzi too. He really wasn’t in the mood for this, all he wanted to do was to go home and be alone. He really was hurting over Danielle’s leaving. This woman had gotten to him and made him love her, despite him trying not to.

He stopped to sign a few autographs thinking it might take his mind off of her. It did for a moment or two until the photographers starting asking where his Canadian guests were and if they were the reason he was here. He smiled kindly, trying to hide his sadness and said yes they were on their way home now and he had just come down to see them off. He said they needed to get back home as Danielle’s husband was waiting for them. He had been ill and not able to come on the trip with them. This he hoped would lead them off the scent of a scandal. This did work for all but one person… the person who saw him and Danielle kissing in the lounge and had taken their picture. This person knew they had a juicy piece of evidence that could be very useful to him down the road. He didn’t know exactly what he was going to do with it yet but he knew it would be valuable. He was going to sit on it until he could figure what he wanted to do.


	40. Coming Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julien and other family members have lots of questions.

The plane pulled onto the tarmac at our airport at 6pm. After crying for most of the first hour of the trip, Alex fell asleep exhausted and I had to wake her up. TJ was wide awake and anxious to get off the plane. He always had more energy than all of us put together.

I had to admit, as much as I was sad to leave Benedict, a part of me was very happy to be home. Home, where I was more in control of what was going on around me. Where I knew what to do, back with my people.

I expected that Julien would be there to greet us; I did call him before we left London to let him know when we were coming home. He seemed odd on the phone, but since the last time we had talked prior to this we had an argument and I ended up going off to a fancy party with another man. I guess he had a right to be at odds with the situation.

I had thought a lot on the plane about what I was going to tell Julien when I did see him. I had to be careful not to say anything that would give him an idea of what had happened between Benedict and me. Part of me still couldn’t believe this had happened at all; that I had let myself become Benedict’s lover. I was more than his lover though, I was his love and he was mine. If I had met him many years ago before Julien, he and I would be together now. Were we to be punished for the fact we lived on two different continents?

As we got off the plane and entered the airport, not only did I see Julien, but our whole family was there - My Mom and Dad, Julien’s brothers and their families and my cousin Lynn (who was more like a sister to me)!  
There were so many hugs and such a fuss you would think we were famous. 

“It’s great to see you all but how come you’re here? I never expected this!” I said  
“We didn’t expect we would be welcoming back such a celebrity” Lynn answered.  
“Celebrity?” I asked  
“You obviously havent seen any newspapers on your way home,” my Mom said, and she held up the newspaper with a huge picture of me and Benedict going into the BAFTA party. The headline asked “Who is Benedict’s Mystery Date?”

“I knew it was in the London papers but I never expected it to be in ours. Does it say anything nice or is it all mean? I asked, scared to know the answer.

“No it’s complimentary.” Julien’s brother said. “We just didn’t know you were such an international jet setter!”  
“She wasn’t when she left!” Julien remarked and he didn’t seem very happy about it.  
“We went to a party and did some dancing. It was amazing”  
“Well let’s all go back to your house and you can fill us in on all the juicy details,” my niece said, anxious to find out all the gossip.  
“Okay. Let’s head home. I’m tired of airports”  
“Us two” Alex and TJ said at the same time.

We headed back to our house where we proceeded to fill everyone in on the exciting week we had. We showed pictures of all the places we had been and of the fantastic rooms that Benedict had put together for us. Alex’s cousins were so jealous, and that was before the even knew anything about Mac. As soon as Alex showed them his picture and explained who he was, the 3 of them took off to Alex’s room for some “girl talk”

“Well it sounds like you had quite the trip” my parents said.   
“Yes it was definitely once in a lifetime” I replied. ‘It’s too bad Julien was sick and couldn’t be there.” I added.  
“Yes I’m sorry I missed it” he said, again with a little disdain in his voice. I don’t think the others noticed, but I certainly did.

Finally our guests all went home and there was only the 4 of us left. I sent the kids to bed early as I knew they needed their rest, especially TJ who hadn’t slept on the plane at all.  
Now Julien and I were alone and that scared me as I didn’t know what he would say.

“So, you really enjoyed your trip I see.” He said.  
“Yes I did. I would have preferred if you had been there too” I replied, which was not a lie because if he had been there, I wouldn’t have cheated.  
“I’m glad I wasn’t as I’m sure I would only have been in your way. How could you have enjoyed the spotlight on Benedict’s arm if I were there?” he said in a sarcastic tone.  
”Do you think that’s why I went?” I asked.  
“What else should I think? You have wanted him for a long time and this was your chance to be with him.” “You’ve wanted the famous life and now you found a way to get it!”  
“That’s not what this was and I can’t believe you would say that. First of all, this was a friendship and nothing more. You have woman friends that you spend time with and you don’t see me getting all bent out of shape over it”  
“They aren’t gorgeous movie stars.”  
‘No, but that doesn’t matter. He is a down to earth person and you would know that if you had come with us. I don’t know what I can do to convince you?”  
“I doubt you will be able to. He is a man and as such I don’t trust his motives”  
“Well other than the party, where we were surrounded by 500 other people, we were always with the kids and/or Benedict’s parents so there was nothing he could do.”  
“I suppose.”  
“Do you trust me? If so then you need to take my word that everything between you and I is the same as it was when I left” .This wasn’t really a lie because it wasn’t good before.   
“I guess so. Alright I’ll drop it. I just really hate that there are pictures of you together in the papers and on the internet. People will think the wrong things.”  
“We’ll have to let them then. As long as you and I are good that’s all that counts”  
“We’re good” he said  
“Good. Now let’s get some sleep because I’m exhausted. This time change is killing me” I knew he would be good with this because he hadn’t wanted anything physical from me in over a year and tonight was no different.


	41. Benedict’s Solution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict has an idea on how he and Danielle can spend time together.

Benedict woke up to the sound of his cell phone indicating he was getting a text. He rushed to grab it hoping it would be Danielle and he was delighted to see it was.

Hi Ben, I miss you so much. We got home safely but it’s not the same without you.

He smiled at her words and texted back his own.

Hi Luv, I’m in bed but it seems so lonely without you. It still smells like your perfume and it makes me miss you all the more.

Danielle’s eyes teared up again thinking of him being so far away.

I don’t know how we are going to do this. All I want to do is to go back to the airport and take the next plane back to you!

I know Luv but we have to be patient. Just know we will be together again!

I’ve got to go. Julien and the kids are waiting for me. Love you darling Benedict.

Love you Danielle.

 

Benedict knew he should lay low a little bit to let Danielle adjust to getting back home. He didn’t want to make Julien more suspicious about them than he already was. It was hard though as all he could do was think about her and wonder what she was doing. He had nightmares where all he could see was Julien kissing Danielle, touching her the way he had done when she was here with him. He woke each time the same way, hollering NO NO NO she’s not yours. She’s supposed to be with me. 

He waited as long as he could but finally he had to call her. Before she left London he had gotten her a new cell phone, one that she could use just for him. That way he didn’t have to risk talking to Julien or having Julien be aware of how often they were talking. He made sure to include a data plan so they could Skype and he would be able to see her face. He dialled her up.

“Benedict” she answered, “Oh how I missed you!”  
“And I you my luv. I have been in agony the last couple of days waiting to talk to you”  
“I missed looking into those eyes of yours and kissing those amazing lips” she said.  
“I know and I have been having some terrible dreams since you’ve been gone.”  
“Oh what kind of dreams?” she asked  
“All I can think of when I close my eyes is you and Julien together and him kissing you and touching you and I wake up screaming” he said.  
“Oh Darling, you don’t have to worry about that” she said. “Julien and I haven’t even hugged since I’ve been home. This is the good thing about having an inattentive husband; he’s not interested in me”  
“Then he is a fool” he said.  
“God I love you”  
“I love you. So what are we going to do so we can see each other?”  
“I don’t know but we need to do something and fast.”

“Would you be willing to accept a job and work for me?” he asked. “If you could then we could come up with reasons why you need to travel to come see me”   
“It would have to be something that Julien wouldn’t find too suspicious.”  
“I always struggle when I’m away and really need someone to assist me on the road. My regular assistant stays home most of the time, I could hire you as my travel assistant and then you would need to be on the road with me. Plus that way you could be my date to these events instead of Karen. When you are at home, you will be busy liaising with my regular assistant and setting things up for me for when I am on the road.”

“I do have a lot of experience with travel and setting appointments up so it would be something I would be good at.”  
“And you wouldn’t have to work for that company anymore which will make all of you happy. Working from home means you can have more flexibility with the kids too. That should make Julien happy”  
“Well I’m not sure how happy he’ll be, knowing it means I would be working closely with you, but he has to agree it is better then what’s happening know. Getting me out of a miserable job will make me so much happier. “  
“Good, so do you want me to call you at home later this week and offer you the job?”  
“That would be a good idea. It will seem less suspicious that way”  
“Okay that’s what we’ll do”  
“Benedict, I don’t want your charity though, if I am going to be employed by you, I want to earn my pay and actually work. Can you promise me that?”  
“If that’s what you want then that’s what you’ll get. You might be sorry though, I can be a tough boss!” he grinned.  
“I guess you might have to make me work long hours and not leave your side for days?” she said.  
“Exactly and I can’t promise that there might not be some sexual harassment either!”  
“I think I could handle that” it was her turn to grin.  
“Okay Luv, I’ll let you go for now, but I will be calling soon as I can’t stand being away from you!” he said.  
“I can’t wait to hear your voice again. Goodnight”  
“Goodnight”


	42. The Proposal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle tells Julien and the kids about Benedict's job offer.

True to his word, Benedict called 2 days later. I acted like I was surprised with what he was telling me and when we got off the phone I went to Julien to talk to him about Benedict’s offer.

“I am guessing that was Cumberbatch on the phone” he said.  
“Yes it was and he has a job offer for me.”  
“A job offer? What kind? We aren’t moving to London you know.”  
“No this offer doesn’t require us to move anywhere.” I said. “But it does offer more money that I make now, gets me away from the job I really hate and allows me more flexibility with the kids.”  
“So basically he is giving you money for nothing”  
“No! That’s not it at all and even if he offered, why would you think I would be okay with that?   
“I could see him making the offer since he could get closer to you that way.”  
“Do you want to listen to what I have to say?” He was really making me irritated.  
“Go on”  
“Benedict’s assistant is pregnant and she can no longer travel with him. He needs someone who can accompany him and make arrangements for what he needs while he is on these trips. It’s important that he can trust the person not to sell him out to the press and so he thought about me. It would mean I would need to travel some but most of the work can be done from home before I leave.”  
“So you want me to say it’s okay for you to take a job that would allow you to travel all around the world with Mr. Gorgeous while you leave me here with the kids?”  
“Firstly, it would not be that much time away from home. Secondly, I would be making enough money that we could afford to hire a housekeeper/cook to help out so it wouldn’t be that difficult and thirdly, do you not think I would still ensure I was involved with the kids even when I was away? I’m not going to address the other insinuation about Benedict as I am tired of answering that question.”  
“It sounds like you mind is made up?” he said  
“It’s a fabulous opportunity for me, why wouldn’t I want to take it? You know how good I am at booking things and taking care of appointments etc., I would feel like I am doing something worthwhile and it would be fun.”  
“I still don’t like it, but I guess if you have made up your mind there is nothing I can do about it”  
“No really there isn’t. I would like your support but I’m not asking your permission.”  
“Do what you want to; just make sure you don’t do anything to hurt those kids!”  
“Calme toi! (Calm yourself)” When he got under my skin sometimes I would use his French phrases against him. “The kids are always my first priority.” I shot back.

I left to call Benedict back.   
“Hi Luv,” he said, “How did it go?”

“About as well as I expected. He wasn’t happy about it. He doesn’t like the idea of me being away from the kids or me spending time running around the world with you. But basically he said it sounded like my mind was made up so there really wasn’t anything he could do about it. I told him it was made up and no he couldn’t and that was the end of that. So when do I start?”

“How does yesterday sound? I would love to say come tomorrow as I miss you, but I know you can’t make it that quickly. How about in 2 weeks? That should give you enough time to quit your job, hire a housekeeper and set things up there. Then you can come meet Bridget my assistant, and she can start showing you what you need to know.”  
“That sounds great. I am so excited, about everything, but mostly about getting to see you again. I didn’t think it would be this soon.”  
“I know, and I can’t wait either. I miss you so much”  
“Keep the bed warm for me. I’ll be there soon”  
“I will my darling.”  
“Goodbye”  
“Goodbye”

So that was done. All that was left was to tell the kids. They were both in their rooms doing homework so I called them out to the living room.  
“So you guys know that Mommy hasn’t been happy at her job for a while right?”  
“Dah, of course” Alex said.  
“Well I now have a new job. One that allows me to make much more money than before and work from home”  
“What is it?” TJ asked  
“I will be Benedict’s new travel assistant” I said  
“What does that mean?” Alex asked with a scornful look only teenagers can give.  
“It means that when Benedict has to travel, I will be taking care of the arrangements and I will be going with him sometimes to make arrangements on location for him.”  
“Does that mean you won’t ever be home?” TJ asked  
“No buddy. I will have to go away sometimes, but I will be mostly at home. It means I will have more time to spend with you and your sister.”  
“What about us while you are away? Does that mean I have to do more work around the house?’ Alex asked.  
“Well, not that it would hurt you to do more, but no. I will be making enough money that I will be hiring a housekeeper/ cook to help out around the house when I’m gone. It may even mean there is less for you to do and not more”  
“What does Dad think about this?” she asked  
“Your Dad isn’t crazy with the idea of me being away but he knows it’s a great opportunity so he has agreed to it. We have already talked”  
“So when do you start?”  
“In 2 weeks. I will get things figured out around here and then I will need to go to London for about a week in order to train with Benedict’s London assistant.”  
“Not sure about this Mom,” Alex said.  
“I know dear, it will be an adjustment for all of us, but I hope you can be happy for me as this is the type of job I have been waiting for!”  
“If you are happy we will be happy too” she said  
“And that’s why you are a great daughter” I said “And I great son” I quickly added


	43. A new Life Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle prepares for her new job and lets her cousin in on her secret.

Talk about things changing overnight. This was more than just about Benedict and I being able to spend time together. This was a major change in our household. Luckily I was able to find a housekeeper quite quickly--a nice widow who was retired and looking for something to do. The kids liked her and she won over Julien by telling him all the great meals she would make when I was gone!

Leaving work was easy. I was finally able to tell my managers goodbye and good riddance. They had put me through hell the last couple of years and I had been waiting for the day I could tell them I quit. To be able to tell them I was leaving to work for Benedict Cumberbatch was even sweeter! The girls at work were so jealous, they couldn’t stand it. They had tons of questions for me. I promised them all autographed photos.

Then there was my family to tell. I knew they would think I was off my rocker but who cares. This was going to make me extremely happy and it wouldn’t hurt my family so why shouldn’t I do it. They have always wanted to squash any fun I might want to have if it wasn’t practical so I was sure this time would be no different.

I started with my brother who did exactly what I thought and questioned my reasoning and my sanity. I told him I was going to do it because it was time I did something for myself and it was a chance to make some good money at the same time. It was pretty much the same with my parents but in the end they just said to be careful and make smart choices.

My sisters-in-law were beside themselves. They couldn’t believe what I was going to do. They asked me if I was going to throw away my marriage and I told them that wasn’t the reason I was doing this, that I needed to prove my worth to myself and have some excitement in my life at the same time. I spent too long doing nothing but looking after my family and my home and now I needed to do something for me. Once I told them that, then they understood. 

It was the conversation with my cousin that was the most challenging as she knew me too well and she doesn’t stop asking questions until she gets to the answer. She and I have always been close and when TJ was diagnosed with his Asperger’s, she was the first person I told. She has always been my confidante and keeping this secret from her didn’t seem right.

I went to see her to talk in person. This was a big step and I knew she would be honest with me and give me an unbiased opinion. I called Lynn and told her I was coming over to discuss something important with her. When I got there she met me at the door, eager to find out my news.

“You finally got a new job didn’t you?” she guessed.   
“Well, yes but there is more to it than that”  
“Okay come on in and spill the beans” she said as she led me to the living room.  
“Well, you know how we went to London and visited Benedict?” I started.  
“Of course who could forget that? Next time you take me with you!” she said smiling.  
‘Well Benedict has offered me a job working for him as his on the road travel assistant”  
“Okay, exactly what does that mean?” she had a puzzled look on her face.  
“It means that when he has to travel for work I will be the one making the arrangements for him and sometimes I will get to travel to assist him while he is away.”

“WOW. I’m stunned. Where did this offer come from? You aren’t taking it are you? What about the kids? What about Julien?” What does this mean for you and Benedict?”

I knew she would be full of questions. “Let me try to answer all your questions one at a time” I laughed.  
1) Benedict’s current travel assistant is pregnant and can’t travel anymore  
2) He needs someone he can trust and he trusts me   
3) I have already accepted it and given my notice at work  
4) I am hiring a housekeeper to clean and cook for the kids and Julien when I am away and when I am home- which will be most of the time-I will be working from home so I will actually have more time with them.

The last question I needed to approach more delicately.  
“I need to talk to you about Benedict” I told her.  
“He’s more than a friend, isn’t he?” she asked  
“Yes, he is”  
“How much more?”

“Lynn, I didn’t want it to happen, and I fought it for the longest time, we both did, but we fell in love.”  
“Are you sure it’s love and not just lust? I am guessing you have slept with him?”  
“Yes we did” My head dropped down a little as I felt the guilt of my betrayal. “Not at first, it really was just a friendship. But he gave me so much more than Julien has ever given me and especially in the last few years”  
“I thought things were good with you two?” Lynn asked  
“That’s it. Things have always been good with us, but never great. We buried ourselves in the kids and you know I wasn’t feeling well for a long time. Once I started feeling better I realized how much had been missing from our marriage. Lynn, he hadn’t even kissed me for at least 2 years!”

“Oh Danielle, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know”   
“I know you didn’t, no one did. I suffered in silence, until one day I finally woke up from the coma I was in and decided I wanted, no I needed, more out of life. I know you have seen a difference in me”  
“Yes I have, since Christmas you seemed different. We were all pleasantly surprised that you were finally able to lose all the weight. I knew something had changed”  
“Yes and Benedict is most of the reason. I started watching him on TV and I got so addicted to his personality, his talent and his beauty that I wrote him the letter that got him to call me. You know me; I’m not the type to get all gaga over a movie star. It was his kindness, his intelligence that drew me to him. When I started watching his work, I realized I was more interested in him than I was in food. I started to have more confidence in myself and I continued to find other interests than food. The more our friendship grew the more weight I lost.”

“But it wasn’t one sided, he was getting something from our relationship as well. He was able to be himself with me and not ‘Benedict Cumberbatch international superstar!’ He was able to tell me things he couldn’t tell anyone else and I shared things with him as well.”

“I tried to get Julien to be more affectionate. I told him what I needed and how I felt and he said he wanted to change, that he knew he needed to, but no matter what I did or how much he said it, he was never able to come back to what we had before. Even when I think of it now, he never was very affectionate with me. I always had to be the one to make a move. If I really think about it, I think I settled for Julien because he was the first good man I had met, the first man who treated me well. I think he settled too. He wanted someone in his life and didn’t realize it shouldn’t be me.”

“Wow, that’s a lot to take in but I see you certainly have thought about this” she said.  
“Yes and you are the only person I have told this to” I told her  
“Well I’m glad you felt you can trust me, because of course you can. I’m not sure how I can help you though.”  
“Just being here to listen is helping. If I didn’t tell someone I was going to explode.”  
“So is this a real job then?” Lynn asked.  
“Yes, I told Benedict I wouldn’t have it any other way. I wasn’t going to be a kept woman, I wanted to earn my money and work hard”  
“Yes that sounds like you” she said grinning.  
“We know we can’t be together until TJ is older, I don’t want him to have a split family”

“So do you think I’m insane?” I had to ask  
“Insane? No, courageous, yes. You seem like you have thought this out well and you are trying to make the best of a less than perfect situation. Are you sure he means that much to you and it’s not just that he is the first man to give you what you think you want?”  
“Believe I have asked myself this same question but the answer is I love him. Yes he is exactly what I want. The only hiccup in his life is his popularity and it’s a price I’m willing to pay.”  
“Well Danielle, you know I love you and want nothing but the best for you, so if this is truly what is making you happy then I am glad for you. If you need anything, please let me know.” Lynn reached out to hug me.   
“Oh Lynn, I knew I could count on you! Thank you for being here for me”  
“I wouldn’t have it any other way” she said.  
“Now tell me about that body of his!” she smiled.


	44. Back in London

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict and Danielle are reunited and make up for lost time.

So now everyone knew and everything was set up, it was time for me to leave for London. This time was so different from the last. This time I knew what I was getting in to and this time, I wasn’t nervous at all. I couldn’t wait to see Benedict. He was no longer a friend but the man I loved and I couldn’t wait to put my arms around him again.   
I said goodbye to the kids and promised I would call them as soon as I got there. I made sure everything would run smoothly for the week I was gone. I said goodbye to Julien and gave him a kiss. Not sure why I did other then perhaps to keep up appearances because there was no love in the kiss. 

When I arrived in London, Walter was there again to greet me, but so was Benedict. He was just hidden a little further away. I resisted the urge to hug him until we got outside so that we didn’t draw any attention to ourselves. Once we were in the car though, I didn’t have to wait to grab him as he already had his arms around me and his mouth planted firmly on my lips.   
“Oh God how I missed you” he said.  
“No talking, more kissing please” I replied, and he obeyed. 

We went straight to his house and then straight to his bed. 3 weeks was a long time to not be able to touch each other, not be able to kiss each other, and not be naked together. Having to wait that long made our love making that much hotter and more demanding. We literally tore the clothes off of each other, our hands moving at double speed, trying to make up for lost time. There was a trail of clothes from his front door all the way up to his bedroom. We didn’t have to worry about who was in the house or how much time we had before someone came back. We were free to do whatever we wanted. My body instantly responded to his touch. His kisses lit the fire within me and once again the river between my thighs started to flow. My body had a mind of its own when it came to Benedict’s touch. My brain shut off and my senses took over. 

His body reacted in the same way, I barely had to look at him and he was as hard as a rock. Over and over, he thrust into me, harder and harder each time. I felt like we had drifted off into another world until we crashed down together in complete ecstasy. 

We enjoyed the peace and complete euphoria that overcame us after each time we lay together. It was something I had only ever dreamed about before I met Benedict. I guess when you are with the right person, things are different. I always loved Julien and I thought we were a decent match, but we really weren’t and I see that now. 

“Is this really happening?” I asked  
“You feel pretty real to me” he said, tickling my ribs.  
“Funny boy, you know what I meant. Have we really found a way to make this work?”  
“Well I don’t want to count my chickens before they are fully hatched, but it seems like we might have” he said.  
“Too bad we even have to work; I would be okay with never leaving this bed!” I said  
“Me too, but one of us needs to work sometimes so we can enjoy getting back into bed!”  
“You are right; it wouldn’t be a treat if we were always here.”  
“Do you think Julien knows what’s really going on?” Benedict asked  
“I am sure he must but I think he realizes there is nothing he can do to stop it. I think he feels that if he doesn’t acknowledge it then he can pretend it’s not happening.”  
“Well it makes it easier for you and the kids that way. I hate to be selfish and I don’t mean the man any harm, but I couldn’t go on without you so if this is what we need to do, for now, then that’s what we need to do.”  
“I know if there was another way, but there isn’t”  
‘Okay enough of this, I can think of a better way for us to spend our first day together!” he said. And with that he slipped under the covers and I completely forgot about whatever it was we were talking about.


	45. Let the Training Begin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle learns about her new job and does her first public outting with Benedict as his assistant.

We spent the remainder of that day in bed. We decided to spoil ourselves and take advantage of the day. Benedict had been thinking ahead and even had some food already prepared so we only had to heat it up. He had planned this day perfectly but then I knew he would.

I called the kids once I knew they would be home from school. Their first day without me went fine. Mrs. Fields made them a great supper and had all the laundry done. They would be spoiled. I asked them all about school like I normally would; only that it was on the phone instead of in person. I reminded TJ to take his shower and Alex about ensuring her homework got done and then told them how much I loved them. I spoke to Julien for a few minutes to make sure things went okay. He was cordial but not extremely pleasant but then I guess that’s all I should expect.

The next day Benedict’s assistant, Bridget, came over. She normally worked out of the house so I didn’t have to go anywhere. She had been working with “Ben”, as she called him, for about 5 years. He told me she was invaluable to him, so I really had big shoes to fill while we were on the road. I made it clear to her that even though I was a friend of Benedict’s that I was there to work and wanted to do a good job. I told her I wanted her to teach me all the things I would need to know to be Benedict’s right hand woman. She assured me she would train me well and she did. 

We spent a lot of hours together over the next couple of days as she trained me on what things he needed when we were away. What to ask for when booking accommodations and what code name to use so the paparazzi didn’t find out where he was staying. Some of the things she didn’t need to tell me—his favourite foods, what type clothes he purchased, who his friends were—these things I already knew from him. She told me a lot of other things that I didn’t know; however, such as who were the reporters he would talk to and who he wouldn’t, what interview questions he refused to answer and how much time he could stand posing for pictures before he got cranky. These were things I needed to make sure of before he went into interviews so as to make things run smoothly. 

It was all very interesting but at the same time it was a little scary. What if I messed up? Would it hurt our relationship? Would he get angry with me? I asked Bridget how short a fuse he had and what happened when he did get mad, as this was a side of him I had yet to see. She told me he didn’t get angry often. Normally it was only if he was getting tried or if people were trying to be very rude or demanding. Normal slips ups didn’t get him angry; he wasn’t that kind of celebrity. Phew! I was glad to hear that.

In our excitement to be together, we almost forgot one very important thing…letting Wanda and Tim know our news. Benedict called them up the morning after I arrived (we had been too busy the night before!). He told them he had a surprise for them and then he put me on the phone.  
“Hello Wanda” I said. “Do you know who this is?”  
“Hmm… not a British accent” she started “Oh my God, is that you Danielle?”  
“Yes, it’s me. I’m here in London for a week as I am starting a new job”  
“That’s wonderful dear. What kind of job is it?”  
“Working for your son!” I said. “Since Bridget can’t fly anymore, I’m going to be his assistant when he is on the road.”  
“That’s fantastic.” She said. “What about the kids and your husband?”  
“We have arranged everything” I proceeded to give her the details.  
“Well that’s great news. You have to come to dinner at our house while you are here. Let me talk to Benedict again so I can arrange this”  
“Sounds wonderful see you soon” and I handed the phone back to Benedict.  
They made arrangements for us to go over there the following night. I was looking forward to it as I thought they were lovely.

While Benedict didn’t make a big announcement to the press that I was now in his employ, we didn’t try to hide it either. That second night I was there, Bridget was supposed to be with him at a small gallery opening but he wanted me there instead. So I got a chance to dress up again; good thing we left some clothes in my closet from our last trip. As we arrived at the gallery, of course the press was there snapping pictures. Some of them recognized me from being there before. 

“Danielle, you’re back” they shouted “How come Benedict? Are you too dating?”  
“No” he said, “But she is my new assistant. She will be travelling with me from time to time as my current assistant is very pregnant and can’t fly. Before you get carried away, no, it’s not my baby!”  
Some of them laughed at this comment as we made our way into the gallery.

Inside the gallery Benedict introduced me to some industry people, people I would have to work hard to remember who they are and how important they may be his career. I smiled and looked very interested in what they had to say. I was used to dealing with big wigs in my previous job and I just used these skills to work the crowds here. Thankfully there were also a lot of Benedict’s friends at this event so I was able to meet them and enjoyed talking with them. They had lots of Benedict stories they were more than happy to share with me, much to his chagrin.

The night wasn’t too bad and as we left I felt very proud of myself. I felt like I represented Benedict very well and made him proud to be with me. As we were heading away from the event and out of sight of the paparazzi, Benedict leaned over and kissed me.  
‘Not that I mind, but what was that for?” I asked  
“Because you are amazing darling, that’s why” he said. “You mixed well with everyone, they loved you. You made the important people feel special and my friends thought you were so lovely. I knew they would like you but they adored you!”

“That’s because I adore you babe! What’s important to you is important to me.”  
He curled up beside me and nuzzled his nose into my hair and against my cheek.  
“God you are so sexy!” I whispered.  
“Really, well let me show you just how sexy I can be” he grinned, as he closed the privacy window between the limo driver and ourselves and proceeded to get me out of my gown.

When we got home Benedict went and poured us a bath so we could relax. I swear the tub in his bathroom was large enough to fit 4 people. He poured in jasmine scented bubbles and lit the candles scattered around the room. He got in first as I watched his bronze body sink into the white suds. He motioned for me to get in and sit between his legs with my back against him. The warmth of the water, the softness of his skin and the protection of his arms around me, made me feel so safe and secure. If I am ever asked where my favourite place in the whole world is, it would be in this tub with Benedict.  
I could feel he was enjoying it as well.

“If I were to die right now, I would be the happiest person on this earth” I told him.  
“This is the best feeling isn’t it darling. I never knew I could be this satisfied. I have been happy before, but every part of me is content and fulfilled.”  
“Body, mind and soul?” I asked, making reference to my words in the letter I wrote to him.  
“Body, mind and soul!” he replied. I could feel his heart beating through his chest and him growing firmer against my bottom.   
“Right now I would say that your body is enjoying this the most” I grinned.  
“Is that a problem?” he asked  
“Not for me” I said as I turned around and kissed those luscious lips again and again as his hands began exploring my breasts. How I ever got so lucky, I wondered, as I let my fingers do their own walking down his chest and to all points south.


	46. Sharing our Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bendict and Danielle let Tim and Wanda in on their secret

During the next couple of days I learned as much as I could from Bridget and I began to make some arrangements for Benedict’s next trip to NYC, or should I say our trip to NYC. I still couldn’t believe this was going to be my new life. 

Benedict and I had supper with his parents at their home. It was different this time. We decided we would let them know the truth and let them share in our secret. We needed to let someone in and they seemed to like me very much and they seemed to approve of us together. So that night we broke the news.

“Mom and Dad, I have something to tell you” Benedict began.   
“Yes Benedict” Tim said.  
“You know that Danielle is my new assistant and will be travelling with me on my press trips”  
“Yes dear we know that.” Wanda replied.  
“And Wanda, when we first met you warned me to be careful as you could see something between Benedict and I and you didn’t want him to get hurt?” I said  
‘Yes I remember” she said, with a slight smile on her lips.  
“Well Mom and Dad we wanted you to know that Danielle and I care very much for each other and we have become more then friends. We really didn’t plan for it to happen but it did anyway. We are in love”

There was a moment of silence before they responded.  
Wanda spoke first “Are you two sure about this? What about Danielle’s family?”  
“They don’t know” I said. “We can’t be open about our relationship yet because of my kids”  
“This job is so that we can spend time together without any suspicion.” He added.  
“It’s not perfect and not what we wanted”, I continued, “but you were correct. What’s happened between Benedict and I wasn’t planned but it is real and it is strong, too strong to be denied. My marriage had problems long before I met Benedict. My husband knew what those problems were but he chose not to do anything to try to fix them.”

“And your children?” Tim asked.  
“We figured this was the best way to shelter them until we can figure out how to make this work. We both want very much to do the right things for all of us.”

“Well it sounds like you are doing everything you can to try to make this work.” Wanda said. “And we do approve of you dear, its clear how much you love Benedict and how much he cares for you. So although it’s not ideal, we are happy for you.”

“Oh thank you!” I said, relieved they took the news so well.  
“Don’t thank us dear, you are the one who has made Benedict so happy, how could we disapprove of this.” Wanda said.  
“And make me happy she does!” Benedict said as he leaned over and kissed me.

So that was one hurdle down and many more to come. This one was fairly easy but others will not be so easy. Benedict and I knew we had to be very careful about being out in public. We needed to make sure there was enough space between us so as not to allow even our hands to touch. We couldn’t risk setting the media up to start looking closer as once they were on to us they wouldn’t let go until they uncovered everything.

At the end of the week I left to return home to the kids and Julien. As promised, I called every night while I was away so I knew what was happening with them. They met me at the airport and asked all kinds of questions about what I did while I was away. I told them it was a lot of work but that I did get to go to a gallery opening and got to have dinner with Wanda and Tim. 

Alex and TJ were sad they didn’t get to see them again but I told them Wanda and Tim both asked how they were doing and I updated them on all the kids’ goings on. I also told Wanda and Tim that they needed to come and visit us sometime so they could get to our part of the world. They thought this was a great idea and promised to come visit us this summer.

Julien didn’t have many questions for me this time. He asked what the job was like and who trained me. He had seen the photos from the gallery opening and I told him how I had successfully won over Benedict’s business contacts. He didn’t really have much to say about that either. His only real question was when would be the next time I would be leaving. Our next scheduled trip was in 3 weeks and it was a trip to NYC for a week. I asked him how Mrs. Fields was working out. He said she was great with the kids and made fantastic meals. It wasn’t the same as having me home but it was an acceptable alternative he said.


	47. I Missed You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Danielle spend some quality time together

Time flew by and it was time for us to go to New York. It didn’t make sense for me to fly to London and then fly back to NY with Ben so we agreed to meet at the Hotel in New York.

I had booked us at the Waldorf Historia as it was one of the nicest hotels in NewYork and it was close to the places Ben needed to be. Being that Ben was perpetually late, I needed to give him every opportunity by booking him close to where we was going to be needed. 

He was going to be filming in Boston later this year, so while we were in NY we would drive to Boston to look at where he would be filming. The rest of the trip was doing interviews and looking into a couple of new potential projects. 

My flight was to arrive first as I only was a couple of hours away. I had to book us two separate rooms in order to keep up the charade that we weren’t together. I booked adjoining rooms so we could slip back and forth without being seen. I wanted to set up his room for him just the way he liked it as well as putting a couple of extra touches for our evening ahead. 

While waiting I drew myself a nice bubble bath. Some time alone was nice… I didn’t get that often these days. I really enjoy my time with the kids and with Benedict but I always like some alone time to regroup my thoughts. Soaking in the tub, I thought about how far my life had come in the last year. Things moved so dramatically. I wanted more out of life and now I had it. Other than having to split myself between two important groups of people, life was good. 

I got out of the bath and headed for my room. I put on my robe and laydown on the bed for a few minutes to relax before Benedict got there. I must have been more tired then I realized as I drifted off to sleep.

I don’t know how long I was sleeping but as I started to wake up, I felt a sensation on my inner thigh. At first I thought it was just my robe but then I realized the sensation was moving up and down my leg, going higher and higher each time! I opened my eyes and saw Benedict leaning over me with his hand between my thighs, caressing me. 

“Hmmm…what a nice way to wake up” I said.  
“Sorry luv couldn’t help it, you are far too sexy for me to resist touching you.  
“Not a problem, luv” I grinned up at him. “You are far too sexy for me to mind”  
I sat up as he leaned in to kiss me. I never get tired of the feel of his lips as they crush against mine. This time they tasted like the cherry lip balm that he regularly uses. 

“There is the mouth I missed!” he said, moaning into me as my tongue sought out his.  
“Is that all you missed?” I asked coyly.  
“Oh no, I’m just starting at the top” he said.  
“Good because I missed you too! All of you!” I said.

As she starting kissing my neck and my collarbone, his hands reached out and removed my robe completely. “God you are so gorgeous” he said. “I instantly get a hard-on when I look at you!”

“Oh good,” I said, “I was afraid you got this from some young chickie in the lobby!” I teased as I put my hand on his crotch to emphasis my point”

“No my luv, only from you! Would you like me to show you more of what you do to me?”  
“Yes please,” I have missed Big Ben”  
He stood up and removed his jeans, in a slow and sensual way. As they started to slide off his hips, I could tell he had nothing on underneath.  
“Now that’s a beautiful sight” I said. “Commando is such a turn on!”  
“I agree, and it lets me get to you faster!” he said with a devilish glint in his eyes.

He stripped his shirt off and laid himself on top of me. The feeling of our two naked bodies pressed together was exquisite. If I hadn’t wanted him inside me so badly I could have stayed like this for a long time just feeling this skin.

“This is where the sexual harassment starts. Are you planning to report me? Should I stop?” he teased.  
“You stop and I’m going to scream so everyone can hear me” I said.  
“Well I guess I better make you happy then” he said as he placed his lips around one of breasts, licking and sucking on the nipple. I groaned into his ear as he did which brought a moan out of him.

“I love to hear you moan” he said as he moved to the other breast and repeated his actions.  
“Keep doing that and you could hear more than moans” I said.   
“That wet are we?” he asked as he put his hand on my folds. “Oh yes you are.”  
“You do that to me” I breathed into his ear.  
“What does this do?” he asked as he plunged two fingers deep inside of me.  
“Oh Benedict, fuck!” I moaned loudly.

He continued moving his fingers in and out of me and rubbed my clit with his thumb. Being away from him had made me even more sensitive to his touch.  
“Bennnn I’m getting close” I growled.  
“That’s a good girl, cum for me darling” he said and he put in a third finger  
“Fuck Ben!!!!!” I screamed as my orgasm smashed through me. 

“Now that’s what I like to hear” he said smiling up at me.  
He bent down between my legs and started to lap up all my juices, instantly making me hips arch towards him.  
“Ready again are we?” he asked as he lifted his head just for a moment  
“I’ll always be ready for you my Luv” I said as he continued to lick me. My body was still reeling from my release yet I could feel it building again.

“Benedict”  
“Yes my dear?”  
“I want to taste you, I want your cock in my mouth, NOW” I urged  
“You sure no how to say all my favorite things!” he said as he moved up the bed.  
I lowered myself to him and nestled between his thighs. His skin was so soft, yet his muscles underneath were extremely firm. I ran my hands up and down the inside of his thighs as he arched back into the bed. 

“This is one of my favorite things” I said as I took my tongue and placed it under his balls, taking one of them gently into my mouth and sucking on it.

“Oh God Danielle!” he growled. “God Damn it that feels so good”  
“Now that’s what I like to hear” I said.  
I continued to please both of his sacs with my mouth as he continued to squirm.  
I then took my tongue and ran it up the full length of him up to the tip and licked the soft pink end of him. Again he moaned.  
“Oh God Ben, you are so gorgeous” I said as I took all of him in my mouth.  
I moved my mouth up and down him, sucking as tight as I could.  
“Oh oh Danielle… Im going to cummmm” he growled as his release overtook him and he squirted in my mouth.  
After swallowing all of him, I looked up and smiled, “You are so tasty my luv!”

He reached down and pulled me back up on top of him and starting kissing me. Despite just having his release, he was still full of passion and his kisses were full of desire. He moved to my neck and nipped the skin on the shoulder. He looked up at me.  
“That was fun darling but I really want to be inside of you” he said as he kisses me again.

“I would love nothing more” I said. As I reached down to stroke him I noticed he didn’t need my help, he was already hard again.  
“Were you eating oysters on the plane?” I asked as you certainly only have one thing on your mind.  
“I always only have one thing on my mind and that making passionate love to you” he said as he moved his hands between my thighs again.  
“And look who’s talking? You are soaked again” he said.

He rolled over on top and me and without wasting any time, thrust into me with all his length. He is so large that this pushed me back up the bed.  
“Try not to put me through the wall luv” I grinned.  
“Sorry, just can’t help myself” he said. This time he grabbed my hips to hold me in place and he thrust into me again.  
“Oh God Ben, don’t stop! Harder, Harder”  
“Holy Fuck Danielle, you are so tight, I can’t last any longer!” He barely had the words out of his mouth when Benedict exploded inside of me. As my body shook from his release it pushed me over the edge and I came with him with earth shattering force.   
We clung to each other tightly as we rode out the waves of ecstasy.

“I hate being away from you” he said, “But if the sex is going to be that good afterwards, then it may be worth it!”  
“It’s always that good sweetheart, maybe just not as forceful” I grinned.  
“True” he uttered and then collapsed beside me on the bed.


	48. New York Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seeing the sights in NY and then getting a surprise call from Wanda

The next couple of days were spent getting Benedict to interviews on time, which was no easy feat. The man really liked to dawdle and was as easily distracted as TJ was. Luckily I was used to dealing with TJ so I used these skills on Benedict and found some success. People were shocked when he actually did show up on time.

Between business engagements we managed to do some sightseeing. I had been to NY a couple of times before but I always loved the lights and busyness of Time Square. At night we even managed to take in a Broadway show or two. Benedict loved watching theatre as much as he loved performing it. I had wanted to see Hairspray ever since my daughter performed it at school. It was so much fun taking in the show with an actor as Ben was able to give me a different perspective on it, making me love it even more.

The nights were even better than the days as they always ended with us making sweet love. No matter how many times we were together it was just as magnificent as the first time, perhaps even better since we knew each other so much better now. We knew what we liked and we weren’t nervous around one another.

When it was time to return home, I wasn’t as sad to leave Benedict as I had been before as I knew there was no doubt we would be together again. I know he felt the same as the desperation and sadness that had surrounded us at Heathrow was nowhere around when we left JFK. We no longer had to worry if people saw us together as that was to be expected, but we still needed to be careful not to “be together” in public.

The next several months went pretty much in the same way; me setting up Benedict’s away trips, and then meeting him there to help while he was visiting. Work wise everything was good. I had some questions at first but Bridget was always reachable so I could seek her advice. 

My relationship with Benedict only got stronger. The more time we spent together the closer we got. He was so easy to be with and I so enjoyed being his confidante. The sex continued to be amazing but more than that we really enjoyed each other’s company. We liked to talk, and read and act all touristy when we were away. There was never a moment when we didn’t know how to be comfortable with each other, we just were.

Life at home was actually better than it had been. I didn’t mind the lack of adventure or lack of attention from Julien as I was getting lots from Benedict. I wasn’t bitter or sad anymore and I think everyone noticed it. I know Julien did even if he didn’t want to admit it. I felt bad for going behind his back but I believe he really knew all along what was happening. I only wished he could find the same happiness for himself

With Benedict I got to travel all over the world. After New York, we went to Japan where they adore him. Then we went back to L.A. for some more photo shoots. Benedict was in hot demand, people wanted him everywhere. I couldn’t have asked for more excitement or adventure in my life. I was in an environment where I felt I truly belonged and I flourished. Benedict commented on how I was a natural fit for the role as I not only could win over the paparazzi and sooth the movie/TV execs, but I came alive on the red carpet or any other event that required me to be by Benedict’s side. I finally felt at home and comfortable with what I was doing. I didn’t feel like I was swimming against the current like I did in my previous job. There I was a square peg in a round hole and now I feel like I had finally found my niche. Benedict and I continued to keep our personal lives a secret from everyone except Wanda and Tim. Benedict would only call me on my cell when it was for anything other than business and Julien did not seem to be any wiser.

One day I was working at home when I got a phone call. It looked like an overseas number but it wasn’t Benedict’s.   
“Hello” I said as I picked up the line.  
“Hello Danielle darling how are you?” It was Wanda, Danielle recognized her voice.  
“Fantastic Wanda, what a nice surprise! How are you and Tim?”  
“We’re great dear. Listen, remember when you were here last you said we should come visit you some time?”  
“Yes I certainly do” I replied  
“Well, how does 2 weeks from today sound?”  
“Are you serious? That was would be lovely! Just you and Tim?” I asked  
“Benedict will come too dear. As you know he has a couple of weeks free in his schedule and we thought it would be nice for all of us to have a visit.”  
“Oh Wanda, that would be fantastic! I would love to show you around and have you meet my family!”  
“Perfect. I’ll send you the details of our flight once it’s booked. Can you recommend a good hotel for us?”  
“I’ll do more than that; I’ll book it for you once I know the exact dates.”  
“That would be great, once less thing for me to worry about.”  
“Wonderful, then we will see you in a couple of weeks dear.”  
“I can’t wait, see you then” and she hung up.  
Wow, lots to do in two weeks. Thankfully Benedict’s schedule wasn’t busy for me right now so I had time to put things together. I would have to let Julien and the kids know. I would have to let my mother and father know and Julien’s family as I know they would all want to meet Wanda and Tim and Benedict.


	49. Canada Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tim, Wanda and Ben get introduced to some of Danielle's family

2 weeks later we were waiting at the airport for our guests to arrive. This would be an interesting trip. If it were just Benedict, I would get him to try hard to disguise himself but with Wanda and Tim with him, it would be hard to disguise all 3 of them. Their accents alone would give something away. The element of surprise and the lack of expectations of them being in our small city would be our best disguise. So instead of having a large group of us there to meet them, it was just the 4 of us- Alex, TJ, Julien and myself. To anyone else it would look like we were there to greet grandparents and maybe an uncle.

Well that’s what we thought anyone. What I didn’t know was Benedict’s cover was blown on the plane so everyone getting off the plane knew who they were and had stopped to ask him for autographs. He signed a couple and then asked that they be left in private to greet us and get their luggage. It always amazed me how polite Benedict’s fans were. They knew he treated them well so they treated him well in response.

Alex and TJ rushed to hug Benedict, Wanda and Tim, which left Julien a little puzzled. Then I got a chance to hug them all, making sure my hug for Benedict was friendly and nothing more. I then introduced them to Julien.

“Julien this is Benedict” I said  
“Hello Benedict, I have heard lots about you” Julien said  
“And I you,” Benedict replied. “You are lucky man to have this great family” he added.  
“Yes I am” Julien agreed.  
“Julien this is Benedict’s parents, Wanda and Tim”  
“Nice to meet you, I recognized you from the cameo you did on Benedict’s show.”  
“Nice to meet you too Julien” Tim held out his hand.  
“We absolutely adore Danielle and your kids and we are so glad to be able to come meet you as well” Wanda said.

“Let’s get your luggage and then we will take you to your hotel to check in” I said. “I have a car rented for you as well.”  
“Perfect”

We let them settle in and rest as the time difference was enough to give them some jetlag.  
That night I planned a party at our house to introduce Wanda and Tim and Benedict to some of our family. Julien’s brothers and their families were there as well as Lynn and her family. I went to the hotel to pick them up and Benedict met me downstairs so we could have a minute to ourselves first.

“Darling I am so glad to have a moment alone with you” he said as he stole a quick kiss.  
“Me too. It’s more tortuous to be near you and not be able to touch you then to not see you at all!”  
“Agreed”  
“This evening will be interesting. Are you sure you are ready for all the attention you are going to get?” I asked.  
“Are you forgetting who I am and how much attention I normally have to deal with?’ he grinned “This will be a piece of cake.”  
“I suppose but those are strangers who already worship you. This is family, mine and Julien’s family. As much as they will be star struck they will also be assessing you to make sure you are good enough.”  
“Oh well thanks, now the pressure is on me” he looked a little scared.  
“I’m not worried about them liking you only if you are going to be annoyed by them”  
“If they are your family, then they will be like my own family and I am sure I will love them too” he said.  
“Oh you are naïve when it comes to this stuff aren’t you?” I teased. “Wanda and Tim are a walk in the park compared to my family, but some of them will be fun.” Our conversation stopped then as Wanda and Tim got off the elevator.

Back at our house, everyone was as excited to meet them as I had anticipated. My nieces were so excited to see Benedict because they knew who he and his parents were because of Sherlock. Benedict was great with them and he indulged all their questions. Wanda and Tim were occupied by Lynn. She thought they were so cute and she is such a doll that they immediately felt comfortable with her. By the end of the night they had invited her to come visit them in London. 

My sisters-in-law were the ones I needed to watch out for as they knew how obsessed I had been with Benedict before I had met him. They suspected on several occasions that this relationship was more than friendship but I had kept denying it. Now that they could see how beautiful he was in person and be charmed by him, they were more convinced than ever that there was something between us. He did have his charm turned up as he wanted them to like him.

Julien’s brothers were the ones who weren’t as crazy to meet them all as they didn’t have much love for a gorgeous man who was giving their brother troubles. They couldn’t be too upset though as Benedict was not just a ladies man, he was a man’s man and he had lots of male friends. While they certainly didn’t run in the same circles, they did have an interest in the movies he had done and also questions about the ladies he had been with as well. Benedict was having a great conversation about this with them while I was out of earshot but once I got closer all of a sudden he seemed embarrassed. I told him afterwards that it didn’t matter to me who had been with before me as long as there was no one after me! After all I was the one who was married to someone else.

The evening went quite well. Each time someone got me alone they went on about how great Tim and Wanda were and about how gorgeous Benedict was. They couldn’t believe I had the good fortune of being like family to them and by extension now my family could say they knew them as well. 

Event number one seemed to be a success but the harder meetings were yet to come.


	50. Meeting the Parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle takes the Cumberbatches to meet her parents

The only people left to meet were my Mom and Dad and my brother. My brother lives in another province and unfortunately wasn’t able to get here to meet the Cumberbatchs so that left only Mom and Dad. I was more worried about them as my family were very old fashioned and very informal while Benedict’s family were more prim and proper. It would be like blending oil and water so I was a little concerned how it would turn out. 2 days later we got the chance to find out. I took them all to my parents’ home in the country. They had a beautiful log home on a large piece of land which I know they were proud to show off and I was quite sure that Wanda and Tim would love.

As we turned into the driveway, Wanda couldn’t help but express how beautiful she thought it all was. Log homes were not something they saw in London and she and Tim were fascinated. My mother met us at the door.

“Hi Mom” I said as I gave her a hug. “This is my friend Benedict and his mom and dad, Wanda and Tim”  
“Pleased to meet you” my mother said. “Welcome to our home, please come in”  
As they stepped in I introduced my Mom and Dad.  
“Wanda and Tim these are my parents- George and Maggie.”  
“So nice to meet you,” Wanda said. “We simply love your daughter and couldn’t wait to meet you”  
‘Dad, this is my friend Benedict, and his parents Tim and Wanda. Benedict is the one from the detective show we watch”  
“Nice to meet you sir. You have a lovely property and your house is amazing”. Benedict always knew the right thing to say.  
“Thank you Benedict. Any friend of Danielle’s is welcome in our home. And yes we quite like it ourselves”  
“Did you want to take a tour before you settle in? Mom asked.  
“Sure that would be lovely” Wanda said.  
“Tim and Benedict would you like to take a walk around the property, down around the fish pond?’ my father asked.  
“Fish pond?” Tim asked. “I would love you!”  
“Okay let’s leave the ladies and head out.”

Mom took Wanda around the house and then she served us some tea. My mother could be as much of a tea drinker as any British person could. We sat down to enjoy our tea and the ladies started to get to know each other.

“So Wanda what is it like having such a famous son? I understand from Danielle that you were quite a popular actress yourself?”  
“Well not near as popular as Benedict but yes I did have a small following back in the 70s and 80s. Benedict has grown so popular that it’s hard for him to have normal relationships. That’s why we were so glad that he and Danielle became such good friends” she said  
“Well, he is awful hard to get along with!” I smirked and then laughed as they knew I was kidding.  
“Well dear he certainly does enjoy your company” Wanda replied.  
“Yes our girl is pretty easy to talk to. She has her father’s wit and my sensitivity I guess” my mom answered.  
“And I so envy you your grandkids” Wanda remarked. “They are such wonderful kids. I don’t know if I will ever have any as Ben’s career is taking up so much of his time these days”  
“Yes Danielle and Julien have done a good job raising them. Alex is becoming quite the lovely young woman and TJ is a great boy to have around. Surely though with Benedict’s looks he wouldn’t have a hard time finding a girl?” my mother asked.  
“He has a hard time meeting women who don’t want him just for his popularity. I also think he has this standard of the perfect woman in mind and no one can match up to her” Wanda looked at me when she said that and I had to look away from her eyes in order to not give anything away to my mother.

Just then the guys came back from their tour of the property.  
‘That’s it Wanda” Tim said, “I have found our summer home! This place is beautiful and has everything I want”  
“Yes Mum,” Benedict said ‘I think Dad would be ready to move right in”  
“Well you are always welcome!” my Dad said.   
“Don’t say that, we might never leave!” Tim said

Mom and I went into the kitchen then to get some more tea.  
“They are such nice folks” she said. “And they sure seem to like you”  
“That’s because we got to know them so well in London. They are very nice and they treated us like royalty”  
“And that Benedict…what a handsome man!”  
“I told you he was and a real gentleman too” I replied  
No sooner had the words come out of my mouth when Benedict appeared in the kitchen.

“Anything I can do to help ladies?” he asked  
“No thank you Benedict but how nice of you to ask” Mum replied.  
“I sure see where Danielle gets her good looks from” he said looking at mum.  
“Thank you Benedict” she said “but you don’t have to flatter me to get your tea”  
“I wouldn’t think of it” he said. Then working hard to make sure no one noticed he slipped his hand around my waist as he passed by me.   
Unfortunately my mother noticed. “What was that about?” she asked  
“What was what about?” I asked, trying to play dumb.  
“Benedict’s hand around your waist seemed a little friendly to me. There isn’t anything going on between you two is there?”  
I hated to lie to my mother but she would make a big out of it so I had to, for now. “That’s just his way, he does that to everyone. I didn’t even notice”  
“I hope that’s all it is” she said, “You have a good marriage and you don’t want anything to ruin that”  
“It’s not that perfect Mom but don’t worry.” I didn’t say anything more than that and I took the tea into our guests.

The rest of the visit went well. Both sets of parents seemed to get along well and Benedict and Dad seemed to hit it off as well. I could see the look of disgust in Julien’s eyes a couple of time. He and my Dad had taken a while to warm up to each other yet Dad and Benedict seemed to be good from the start.


	51. Alone at Last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wanda helps Benedict and Danielle spend some time together without suspicion

That evening Wanda helped Benedict and I have some time alone together. She asked if she could borrow me for the evening to have some girl time for dinner and perhaps a movie. She said she was tired of all the “guy talk” between Benedict and Tim. What could Julien say to that without looking like a heel? So I headed out to their hotel about 6pm. 

Benedict met me in the lobby and we went up to his room. The door closed behind us as we reached for each other. I couldn’t wait to get my hands on him and he was the same. It had only been a couple of weeks but the fact that we had been together for 2 days and couldn’t even touch each other was pure torture. 

His kisses were sweeter than ever, his touch more silky, his face more exotic. I never knew I had this much desire in me. I always thought I wasn’t one of those women who craved intimacy but I guess it was just because I hadn’t found anyone who made me feel like that.

My hands caressed his face, his beautiful neck was covered by my mouth, and my breasts were pressed firmly against his gorgeous chest. My hands quickly found their way to his pants were my fingers deftly unleashed the hard body trapped underneath. At the same time, my ears were being nibbled by his sensual mouth, and the buttons on my blouse were quickly being opened. I then felt a hand glide under my skirt and up my thigh.   
“Oh in a hurry were we?” he laughed, “You seem to be missing your panties!”  
“I didn’t think you would mind!” I said.  
“Not at all” His hand continued to caress me in my most erotic way as the moans escaped my lips.

“That’s the sound I have been waiting to hear”  
“Oh baby. Don’t stop please!” I begged.  
“Don’t worry I won’t” he replied.  
I reached down and began to caress his hardness. I didn’t think I could miss a body part but oh how I had missed this part of him.   
We moved from the wall to the bed, where the remainder of our clothes hit the floor. My mouth moved down between his legs as I loved to hear him moan.  
“My God Darling, you do that so well”  
“Only for you dear!” I replied.  
We continued to enjoy each other until our bodies could stand it no longer. We exploded together and dropped back on the bed in total delight. 

“Is it possible, it only gets better each time?” Benedict asked  
“Seems like it doesn’t it?” I answered.  
“This sharing you with him is killing me, you know that don’t you? He asked. “I can’t stand the thought of him putting his hands on you and making you moan.”

I looked up at him very seriously, “Benedict, I havent been with Julien since I was in your bed. I can’t fake intimacy with him when all I want is you.” Then I added, “It’s okay that you have had other woman, I know they throw themselves at you constantly and that is the way your life is. If I can’t commit to you, I don’t expect you to commit to me”

“Danielle, I couldn’t even look at another woman after you! Have you noticed none of my movies lately have involved love scenes? You are the only woman I want to touch”  
The realization hit us that this was real. We wanted and needed each other and only each other.   
“What can I do though? I can’t just say, sorry Julien, I decided I’m in love with Benedict and I’m leaving?”  
“Not like that, but is it fair to him to keep sneaking around behind his back? I know if I were in his shoes I would rather know now then feel like a fool later.”  
“What about the kids?”  
“I love the kids and I would love them to be in my life” he said.   
“How would we ever make that work?”  
“I don’t have all the answers darling but I believe in us and I believe we can make this work. We are two smart caring people and Julien seems reasonable enough that surely we can find a way to do this so everyone wins.”  
“Oh that it could be true. The more time I spend with Julien, the less time I want to spend with him. I feel guilty but I don’t feel remorse. I don’t have any love left for him and I feel that’s because he doesn’t appear to have any for me. He is jealous of me with anyone else but he is not capable of loving me himself”  
“While I have lots of love to give you” he said as he reached out and kissed me.  
“Yes you do” I replied as I snuggled in next to him, feeling the warmth of his body envelope me.  
“I love you more everyday” he said  
“And I you. I still can’t believe how we got here but I am so glad we did!” I replied.

“Benedict” I looked at him seriously this time, “we will have to be patient a little longer. Alex is old enough she is almost out of school but TJ is still so young that I don’t think I could do that to him right now. If you can hang in there until he matures a bit more and he can understand what is happening. Another year could make a big difference in his understanding and make less of an impact on him. I’m sorry but as much as I want to be with you fulltime, I have to think of the kids first because they are the innocents in all of this” I started crying because I knew I was hurting him as much as I was hurting myself.

“Darling, please don’t cry. I can’t be selfish about this. As hard as it is for me to be away from you it has to be twice as hard on you and I understand that. I will do whatever you need me to do to make this work” As he said this he wiped the tears from me eyes and then kissed me gently. 

“What did I ever do to deserve you?” I asked.  
“Maybe it’s not what you have done but what you will do?” he smiled that evil salacious grin.  
“I think I can handle that” I said as I leaned over and kissed his chest once more.

I went back home after our evening together, grateful for the time we had alone. This double life was killing me but for now no one seemed to be getting hurt. Until I could figure out a better way to handling this, it would have to do. 

We had a couple of more days of sightseeing and Benedict and I had one more rendezvous before they all went back to London. All we could do was hang onto the memory of the moments we had together until we were able to be together again.


	52. Time to Make a Move?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle decides she is going to leave Julien for Benedict but before she gets to tell him, the cat gets out of the bag.

Things went pretty well for a while but the strain on me was getting to be more than what I could manage. I always felt like I was looking over my shoulder and being secretive was not in my nature. Even as a child I had a guilty conscience and had to confess to my mother every bad thing I have ever done. I started not being able to sleep at night and I was edgy all the time. I knew I had to tell Julien. I had to stop living this double life. 

I was in London for work when I decided it was time to end this. Benedict and I were having dinner at home when I let him know.

“Benedict, I have decided something”  
“What is it my dear, you seem so serious?’ he asked  
“I’ve decided….. I’ve decided I am going to tell Julien about us and I’m going to leave him” As I said it the words stuck in my mouth with the enormity of what they meant.  
“Are you sure? What changed your mind?”  
“This lying and hiding is driving me crazy. I can’t live this double life. It’s not healthy and it’s dishonest and that’s not who I am”  
Benedict stood up then and came over to me. He knelt down and put his arms around me.  
“Darling I am so happy! I know it will be hard but I can’t wait to have you all to myself. I love you so much!”  
“I love you too! It’s time for us to plan our life together.”  
“This is the best news I have ever heard. Let me know what you want me to do to help”  
“For now, nothing. Just keep loving me.”  
“That I can do!” he said as he reached out and kissed me once more.

“What do you want to do about my fans? Is it time to go public as well?” He asked  
“Oh I don’t know. That will be another large obstacle to deal with, but as soon as I leave Julien I am sure somehow that will get out. Maybe we can wait though and deal with this first then we can figure out the next steps.”   
“Sounds good darling, now come here and let me show you again how much I love you!”  
“I would like nothing more!”

On the plane back home I thought about what I would say to Julien. I thought it best to not tell him the moment I got back but to wait a day or two so it wouldn’t look like I had just jumped out of Benedict’s bed to tell him goodbye. Unfortunately I didn’t get to decide how this would go down.

Julien picked me up at the airport as he normally did, but I could see something wasn’t quite right with him. He seemed upset for some reason.

“How is lover boy?” he asked as we were driving home.  
“If you mean my boss, Benedict is good. We got a lot of work done this trip.” This wasn’t a lie; we did do a lot of work between having fun.

“So you are going to try to keep sticking with that story are you?” he growled  
“What is the matter with you?” I asked “Why are you being like this? This was a business trip the same as it always is, so why are so you angry?”  
“Perhaps it has something to do with this.” 

In his hands he had a photo from the internet that had been taken in the first class lounge at Heathrow when Benedict and I were saying our goodbyes. Someone must have taken our picture but we didn’t notice. The caption read “That’s an awful passionate kiss for Just Friends!” 

“I have to agree with the caption. Doesn’t look like Just Friends to me!” this time he shouted. “What else happened when you were there? How many times did you sleep with him?”  
“Julien let me explain. I was planning on telling you, just not tonight.”  
“What you thought you would come home and sleep with me for kicks before you let me know?”  
“No it’s not like that at all. I wanted us to get settled in so we could talk without all this emotion hanging over our heads”  
“Well sorry if your plans got ruined. My life pretty much got ruined when I saw this picture. I’m only glad that none of our friends or family has seen this yet.”  
“They haven’t, oh good.”  
“Really, is that all you have to say?”  
“No, of course it isn’t. Let me talk please. I can explain.” I wanted time to put things into perspective for him, to let him know this was not as calculated as he thought it was.  
“Go ahead and spin your lies. I’ll listen”

“When Benedict and I became friends that is all it was. I wanted you to come with us when we went to London. I was proud of our family and wanted him to see us together.”  
“Proud, that’s a funny way of showing pride by jumping into bed with a man the second your husband isn’t around!”  
“Julien, I know you are hurt but these insults aren’t helping. Please let finish and then you can say all you want to”  
“Fine, go ahead” he grunted.

“When you got sick, I wasn’t going to go, but you insisted so we went. As we began to spend time together I did feel a closeness to Benedict that hadn’t been between us for awhile. When I first started talking to him on the phone you insulted me by not understanding how anyone could find me good company or a confidante. You never seem to appreciate me for anything other then doing the dishes and looking after the kids. I needed to be more then a Mom and wife, I needed to be a woman. I tried to tell you that and I tried to change our relationship, but it seemed like I was the only one who wanted things to change.”

“So here was Benedict, who admired me not just for being a good Mom, but because I was a good friend, someone he could rely on and someone whose opinion he valued. I was careful not to allow anything to happen that shouldn’t. I was working hard to stay just friends. I made it clear to him that was all we could be. Then when I called you to ask about going to the BAFTA party and you jumped to conclusions and insulted me, it made me question what we did have. Did we have anything anymore?”

“I still wasn’t planning on doing anything but at that party, something between us changed. Maybe it was because I was mad at you or maybe it was because he was so damn caring, he said all the things that I was aching to hear. So yes I wanted to sleep with him and I did! But it was more then sex, it was passionate but tender. I could feel his love for me in every kiss. I havent felt like that here in the last 5 years”

“So you have been sleeping with him all this time? And now you concoct this “Job” so you would have an excuse to go have sex with him whenever he wanted you. Like a hooker!”   
I reached over and slapped his face at that remark. “How dare you! That’s low even for you!”  
“Well that’s sure what it seems like to me”  
“I wanted to come home and tell you I was leaving, but I thought I owed it to you and the kids to try to stay and make things work. I could still be a good mother and wife even if I wasn’t faithful. It’s not like you wanted anything to do with me. I didn’t even have to turn you away as you didn’t want me.  
“You can’t be serious! Its one thing to have an affair, but come on, you don’t really think there is a life for you with him?”   
“I do. He wants me in his life and he would have the kids too if it comes to that. They are fond of him too.”  
“Oh no you don’t, Cumberbatch is not getting my kids!”  
“Look it’s too early to figure this all out. I just know that I love Benedict and he loves me and we want to build a life together” ‘This is why I didn’t want to talk about this now as there are too many questions and not enough answers right now. Our emotions are getting the best of us and I know we can’t be thinking as clearly as we should. Right now the kids don’t know anything. They never saw us together. As far as they know we are friends.”  
“Well at least you had the decency not to parade it around in front of them.”  
“I didn’t want to parade it around in front of anyone. I feel hurt too; it’s not easy for me either.”  
“Oh poor you; at least you have his bed to jump into to make yourself feel better.”  
“Let’s get home. I’m tired and I am done talking to you tonight.” I’ll sleep on the couch.” I said.  
“You do that because you aren’t sleeping with me!”   
We drove home in silence, both of us fuming mad at the other, and when we got home he stormed off into the bedroom.  
It was done, but that didn’t make it any easier. Despite what I felt for Benedict, I still loved Julien. He was a large part of my life for 18 years. I wasn’t about to forget my love for him in one w


	53. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julien starts out angry and then surprises Danielle with his response.

After Julien went to bed, I took a moment to text Benedict and let him know I made it home okay.   
Hi Darling. Made it home safely but things didn’t go as planned. Check out this link. Julien and I had it out tonight. Got to sleep now. Text you more in the morning.  
D  
No more then 2 minutes later my phone vibrated. Benedict had texted me back.

Oh my love. I am so sorry. Didn’t know about that picture. Sorry things didn’t go well. Remember I love you. Talk to you tomorrow.  
B

Well at least Benedict still cared but that was little consolation after tonight’s events. Hopefully things would look better tomorrow after some sleep. After a lot of tossing and turning, sleep finally won me over and I drifted off.

The next morning the kids slept in and so did Julien. I was awake early because I couldn’t sleep. My mind was racing over last nights events. I wish that picture had not been taken. The discussion would have gone that much better had I been able to start it off the way I wanted instead of being ambushed.

I had only been awake for 5mins when my cell phone started vibrating. This time it wasn’t a text, it was a call from Benedict. Before I could say anything I heard his voice.  
“Hello love. I wish so much I could be there with you. I hate that you had to face this all alone.”  
“It’s so good to hear your voice. I miss you so much. I wish you could be here too but it wouldn’t have made it any easier. Probably would have made it worse.”  
“True. Was he really awful to you?”  
“He was hurt. I have to remember if the shoe was on the other foot I would feel the same way.”  
“True again. You always try to see things from all sides don’t you? That’s why I love you; you are so fair and caring”  
“And I love you because you have a big....”   
“Hey!” he jumped in. “Get your mind out of the gutter!”  
“A big heart is what I was going to say” laughing as I said it. “Where was your mind going?”  
“Oh nowhere” he laughed. “Well at least you still have your sense of humor”.  
“The only thing that will keep me sane” I said.  
“I better go, the kids will be up soon and they don’t know what’s happening. I want to keep it that way until we can figure things out.”  
“Ok, I’ll let you go for now, but you know I won’t last long without the sound of your voice.” He sounded so lonely.  
“I know, I miss you too. It won’t be too long. Promise!”  
And with heavy hearts we hung up.

“Wasn’t that special? You boyfriend miss you already?” Julien had been there listening.  
“Spying on me now are you? That’s a new low.” I answered.  
“How else will I know what’s going on? You lie to my face so I need other ways of figuring it out.”

“I told you the truth last night. Do you want me to tell you again?” I was getting angry now. I know I was the one who cheated but he wasn’t innocent in this whole thing.

“Yes please. Tell me something. I still can’t understand who you could just throw away a 18 yr marriage for a fling with a pretty boy.”

“Well first thing is you need to understand he is so much more then a pretty boy and if you had understood that I am so much more then a wife, then the marriage would have been too valuable to throw away” I wasn’t going to let him off easy.

“How can you say that? You were, you are everything to me” all of a sudden his face changed and tears started rolling down his cheeks. I didn’t know what to say.  
“I’m so sorry you don’t know how I feel about you. I love you with all my heart and I have since the first day I met you. You swept me off my feet then and you still do now.”

“How would I ever know that? You never show me any affection; you never say anything nice about me. I need more then that. I told you that before and you still continued to ignore me”

“It’s hard for me to express my feelings, you know that. You should know how I feel”  
“It doesn’t work like that. A woman needs to feel special, I needed to feel special. I shouldn’t have to guess if you still love me.”

“Please don’t leave me, don’t give up on us!” He was pleading now and it was breaking my heart. I started to think about the way things were when we first met and how good it was then.”

“I still love you, and I will always love you. This was hard on me. I don’t want you to think I just jumped into Benedict’s arms the first chance I got. Of course he’s handsome but that’s not what attracted me to him. It was how he valued me as a person; how he thought I was special. He could have any woman he wanted but I was the one who touched his soul and he touched mine.

“I feel that way about you too. You don’t see me watching you when you don’t think I am. I see how magnificent you are as a mother; you are everything to those kids. They would never have become the people they are if it weren’t for you. Now I was crying. He never said anything like that to me before. “More then that, you are a wonderful person. You know everything I need before I need it. You know me better then I know myself. I see how caring you are, how intelligent. You can talk circles around people and you amaze me everyday with how your brain works” 

“Why did you never tell me? Why have you stayed away from me when all I wanted was you? “When a woman has to beg to be loved by her man, she starts to think he doesn’t care. That’s the worst feeling in the world”

Julien came over to me and held my face in her hands. “I’m so sorry. You are the most beautiful woman I know and I have been a fool for not showing you” For the first time, he looked at me with all the emotion that was in his heart. He reached down and kissed me and my mouth responded to his. This was the man I married, the man I wanted to share my life with. But wait…was this too late? I pulled back quickly. 

“What’s wrong?” He looked shocked that I had pulled away from him.

“If you had said this to me before, before I had to ask, before I had met Benedict, it would have been different. Now I don’t know.” I saw the look in his eyes. “I’m sorry but you wanted me to be honest. Benedict is not just a fling. He means something to me and I have to consider him as well. When I came home I didn’t think there was anything left of us.”

“Whatever you need me to do, I will do it. You mean everything to me.”  
This was the first time I had ever seen him so vulnerable.   
“I need some time.” I told him. “Some time to figure this all out.”  
“I’ll give you whatever time you need, just tell me you’ll give us another chance!”  
“I’ll think about it.” I had to walk away then. This was more complicated then I thought


	54. Impossible Decision

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle tries to decide which man she belongs with

All that day I walked around in a fog. I couldn’t concentrate on anything. A year ago I was bored and looking for some excitement in my life and now I had more excitement then I knew what to do with.

I watched Julien and the kids and I saw how much they missed him and he them. I thought about their relationships. He wasn’t perfect, but it was clear that he loved them and he was there to see all their special moments. My decision not only affected me but affected them. I couldn’t be selfish. 

So that was one point for Julien. 

Then I thought about my life with Julien, all the history we had together. I thought about how he was there with me for all the important moments of our lives. How he supported me through some very tough years, always willing to do whatever I wanted. He deserved my commitment didn’t he?

That was a second point for Julien

Then there was his heartfelt appeal to me this morning. He was so sincere and for once I felt like he was truly honest and open with me. I still wasn’t sure he knew what I needed to be happy. It wasn’t in his nature to be affectionate but if we were going to be happy as a couple, he was going to have to learn how to be. Living without that for so long, I knew this was not a negotiable item. If we were going to have any future together, I needed this.

One point for emotion and honesty, one point for effort but minus one point because if not knowing if he could pull it off.

Then I thought about Benedict. Benedict who made me feel so special. Benedict who loved me for me. Loved me for my mind, my caring, and who thought I was beautiful. With Benedict I didn’t have to wonder how he felt about me, he told me and showed me regularly. Even when Julien and I first started dating, he was never really affectionate. I had to make the first move every time. I wonder if I never made the first move if we ever would ever have had sex.

One point for Benedict for knowing what he wants and going for it

Benedict’s lifestyle might be hard to adapt to. I wouldn’t have to work anymore, which would be good. And I would have a very exciting life meeting stars and going to parties.   
But with the kids, I wouldn’t have the freedom he has and it might cause problems for us. But then Benedict loves the kids and would like to be involved in their lives. 

Not sure if this is one point for or against. I guess overall it is a positive.

I would have to keep competing for Benedict’s attention as there would always been a stream of women throwing themselves at him. That’s a minus. But Benedict would be good at making me feel special so I might not mind.

This was the most important decision of my life. I really have to decide whether to honour my vows about for better or worse and try to make my marriage work, or to be selfish and run towards the thing that is making me happier then I ever thought I could be.

I knew what the answer had to be, but I didn’t want to disappoint the other one.


	55. Telling Julien

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle breaks the news to Julien

I decided to tell Julien my decision first as he was my husband after all. I asked him to go for a walk with me as I didn’t want the kids to know what we were talking about. I didn’t however tell him why I wanted to go for the walk. As we headed down the road I turned to him and told him why I wanted to come for the walk, that I had made my decision.

“Julien, you and I have a long history together. We have known each other 21 years and have been each other’s companion, confidante and supporter for all this time. Most of the time we have spent together has been good. You have always been there for me when I had a work or family struggle. I always felt like you had my back. You were the first person who ever truly cared for me and showed me that I was worth caring for. I will always love you for that”

Julien started to anticipate my responses and tried to cut in. “That should amount for a lot shouldn’t it?” he said.

“Yes Julien it does, but can you please let me finish before you say anything further as this is hard enough as it is”  
“Okay, I will” he said.

“You and I fell into a rut somewhere along the way. We no longer cared about spending time together or about being intimate. I know I was the first one to shut down in that department but at the time I had no energy and no drive and now I know it was physical and not emotional. I needed something to pull me out of the depression I was in and I have been successful at that. The issue was that you got used to being that way too and when I got better you got worse.”

“When I started to think about how long it had been since you kissed me, I got very sad and then I started to try to notice the little things that would show your affection for me, but sadly I didn’t see any. I even told you how I was feeling and what I wanted from you yet nothing changed. When I thought back to when we first met, I realized it had always been this way; you always waited for me to make the first move and only reacted to what I initiated. I needed more.”

“When I started my friendship with Benedict that was all it truly was, a friendship. But what I found was that he was giving me the emotional support that you weren’t and he was cherishing me as a woman when I only felt like your roommate. At the same time, I was filling a whole in his life. I know it would be kinder to say that it was only a fling for the sex, but Julien I fell in love with Benedict.”

I looked into Julien’s eyes and saw that they were beginning to fill up with tears. He was never one to show any emotion. I was surprised by this.

“If it hadn’t been for the children, I honestly don’t know if I even would have come back from London at all. But I couldn’t do that to them and I couldn’t do that to you. Ben and I talked and decided to keep our relationship a secret so I could continue to provide Alex and TJ with a normal family life for at least another year so TJ would be better able to understand what it would all mean.”

“But I couldn’t stand the stain of hiding this secret so I decided to put an end to it and tell you I was leaving. My mind was made up…right up until you finally showed me some emotion, some sense that you cared for me.”

I looked him in the eyes again. “Julien, I have decided to give our marriage one more chance.”  
This time he openly wept. “Oh Danielle, thank you. Thank you for giving me another chance, thank you for believing in me, in us!”  
He started towards me to put his arms around me, but I stopped him.  
“Before we go any further though, there is something else I need to say.”  
“Anything Danielle, what is it?”

“Firstly, I don’t want to hear anything bad out of your mouth about Benedict. He was an innocent in all this and it’s bad enough that I have to break his heart. Secondly, I will stay with you as long as you keep your promise and make the changes you need to make. I am not living in a loveless marriage anymore; I need to feel that I am someone special to you, in actions as well as words. And thirdly, I am going to need time to settle back into our marriage so you will have to be patient with me. As I said, I love Benedict and even though I am choosing to stay with you, it doesn’t mean I decided I love him any less. Can you handle these conditions?”

“As hard as it is on my ego to realize you love another man, I know it was my actions that led you to need him in the first place so yes, I can and will comply with what you need from me in order to make this work”

“Good” I said, “Now I will take that hug”


	56. Breaking Benedict's Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle has to tell Benedict the one thing she never wanted to.

Telling Julien was the easy part. In my heart, it was not what I wanted, but it was what I felt I had to do. If the situation were reversed, I would want him to give me a second chance, so it’s only right that I do that for him. Telling Benedict though will break his heart and mine too. 

As much as it was the cowardly way out, I could not do it in person. If I saw his face, if I felt his touch, I would not be able to go through with it and I had to, for my family.

I hid out in my bedroom to make the call. As Benedict picked up, he sounded so cheerful as he had no idea the change of mind I had since I last saw him.   
“Hello Luv” he said, “I miss you”  
“Hello darling” I replied.  
“So how are things?” he asked  
“All right I guess” I continued. “Benedict, I need to tell you something”  
“What is it Luv? Are you pregnant with my child?” he asked all excited at the possibility.  
“No darling, nothing like that”  
“Oh bloody hell, I was hoping” he said.  
“Ben, please I need to be serious now. Please let me tell you what I need to” I said  
“Sure Luv. I’m sorry, go ahead” He voice was now very concerned as she never called him Ben so something must be very wrong. 

“Darling, you know how much I love you; you are one of the most important people in the world to me. I have feelings for you that I have never had for any other person ever. You know me so well and you complement my shortcomings. God knows I have never felt as physically alive as I have since I have been with you! I wish I had met you 20 years ago before I had met Julien as I know we would have a long and happy life together”

Benedict was no fool, he was sensing where this was going and he wasn’t very eager to hear what was coming next. “But?” he asked

“But you also know how much my family means to me. Ensuring my kids have the happiest childhood is the most important thing in the world to me. Above all else, this needs to happen.”

“I love your kids too and would want the same for them” he said.  
“I know you do and they adore you, but nothing replaces being with their father and being brought up in a normal family atmosphere. I was ready to sacrifice that for us and I went home prepared to leave Julien. When I told him what had happened between us, he begged me for another chance. He promised me that things would be different, that he couldn’t lose me and declared how much he cared for me. I have never heard him display such emotion ever before. I thought about us and I thought about my life with him. I decided that if he truly could change then we had a chance to be a great family again and the kids deserve that. If the shoes had been on the other foot, I would have wanted him to give me a second chance.”

“So?” he asked hesitantly  
“So, it means I can’t be with you anymore” As the words came out of my mouth, the tears came out of my eyes. “I need to give me marriage another shot” I was sobbing now.

“Danielle, you can’t mean it. You have to think about yourself as well as your kids. Do you believe he can truly make you as happy as you are with me?” I could hear the tears in Benedict’s voice as well. 

“As happy, no Benedict, I don’t think anyone can make me as happy as you do, but in this case I have to settle for ordinary happy. If I had been happy to start with, I wouldn’t have gone looking for you and I would not have known the sheer ecstasy I would find in your arms. It would have been good enough, so now it has to be good enough”

“Oh Danielle, you are so wrong. My darling you are breaking my heart. You are my world; I can’t function in it without you anymore. You deserve to be as happy as you can possibly and you know that is with me.”

“Sometimes doing the right thing is very hard, but it doesn’t make it any less right. I will always love you Benedict. You have taken over a place in my heart where you will always stay. I have only one regret about us being together, and that is the pain that this is causing us right now. I feel it too, my heart is breaking also, but it has to be. I will cherish all the memories of the time I have spent with you until I the time that I pass on to another life.”

“Well, I know you are wrong, I know we belong together and I know Julien will never be able to make you happy. But, I will abide by your wishes and allow you to get back to your husband without any interference. Promise me one thing though?” he asked

“Anything my luv, what?”  
“That the day he breaks your heart again, that you will come back to me immediately, as I will be waiting for you” he said.

“Benedict I can’t promise you that because as much as you think that’s what you want, it is not fair to you. I don’t want you waiting around with false hope of us getting back together. I want you to find that special person who will make you happy and move on with your life” Again tears crowded my voice as I said these words as the last thing my heart wanted was for him to be with another woman.

“Danielle I can tell you what you want to hear but in my heart I know I can’t do that. Just please know that if you ever want me, I’ll be there for you.”

“I love you Benedict”  
“I love you Danielle”

The next thing he heard was the sound of her tears as she hung up the phone.


	57. Alex asks Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle discovers Alex is more grownup then she thought

Danielle cried so hard so almost threw up. Telling Benedict goodbye was the worst thing she had ever experienced. How was she going to get him out of her mind? Then it hit her, what was she going to do for a job now? She couldn’t go on working for him, it would be too hard.

Her life felt like it was falling apart. She should be happy that Julien had recommitted to her but instead she wished he hadn’t. It would have been easier for him to stay as he was then she would have had no problem leaving him. This way she had to deny her feelings for Benedict and try to find feelings for Julien again. 

Alex heard her crying in her room and knocked on the door. Instead of waiting for Danielle to say something she walked right in. When she saw how distraught her mother was, she rushed to her and put her arms around her wanting to know what was wrong.

“Mom, what is it? What is making you so upset?” she asked  
“Oh Alex, I’m sorry, I didn’t want you to see me like this.”  
“It’s okay Mom, I just want to help you”  
I tried to straighten up and collect myself. “I’m okay really”  
“No Mom you’re not!” she insisted. “Tell me what’s wrong”

“I just had to tell Benedict I couldn’t be friends with him anymore” I said.  
“Why? I thought you guys were such good friends, what happened?” Alex asked  
“My friendship with Benedict was getting in the way of my marriage to your father. We were starting to develop feelings for each other that a married woman isn’t allowed to feel” I couldn’t believe I was sharing so much with her, but she was old enough to understand.  
“Oh Mom, I’m not surprised. I saw the way you too looked at each other. I knew there was more there than you were letting on. You obviously aren’t happy with having to do this.” She said.

“No dear, I’m not. I know it’s not fair to your father to continue to see Benedict but he’s been such a big part of my life for the last year that I can’t imagine what things will be like without him. And the worst part is, I broke his heart.” I started crying again thinking about Benedict.

“Mom, I know I’m not a grown up and I know marriage and fidelity are very important, but I have to ask, if it weren’t for TJ and I, would you still be with Dad?”

“Alex, I don’t want to lie to you, I honestly don’t know. Your Dad and I have grown apart the last few years. We have committed to each other to work to get back to where we were and do everything we can to keep our family together. We love you and TJ so much and we want to do everything we can to make you happy.”

“Mom, all I know is, you have never been happier than you have been since you met Benedict. I don’t want to see you go back to how you were. I’ll do whatever I can to help you” 

“Alex you are such a fantastic, mature young woman. I love you so much and the fact that you are saying all these things to me is making it better. Things will be back to normal and we all will be happy again. It’s hard today because it just happened but we will move on and I will be okay. Thank you though for caring so much.”  
“Well I only have one mother and you know what they say…if Mother isn’t happy no one is happy!” She said with a smile.

“I guess so” Now let’s go see what Dad and TJ are up to.

 

Benedict got off the phone after speaking with Danielle and he was in shock. He couldn’t believe what had just happened. He was expecting her to tell him she had talked to Julien that she told him she was leaving him. Everything was so good between him and Danielle, they were in love. He couldn’t fathom why she would change her mind. Was this a dream? A nightmare? Had he done something wrong? Had he pushed her too hard? Why was this happening?

Suddenly the questions stopped going through his mind and the tears started. He was openly sobbing as he thought about his life without her. It wasn’t possible, he couldn’t manage without her. She was the first thing he thought about in the morning and the last thing he thought about at night. Early on in their relationship he knew there was a possibility that she would never be his, but not after this amount of time and everything they had done together. They were so perfect together, how could she give that up.

One of the things he loved most about her was her conviction to her values and her morality. It had killed her that she had broken her wedding vows, but the attraction between then was too strong. Now that morality was the thing he hated. He knew she was only doing this because it was the right thing to do for them-Julien and the kids and not because it was the right thing for her. He knew if they had no children, he would have won her own no problem. She was a fantastic mother and her devotion to her children was another thing that impressed him about her. He knew if they ever had children of her own that she would be amazing. Now this devotion was standing in the way of their happiness. 

Benedict headed straight to his liquor cabinet. If there ever was a reason to drink, this was it!


	58. How Committed was she?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle and Julien try to get back to the way things were

After talking to Benedict, Danielle was heartbroken. She knew she needed to talk about this to someone who would help her get past this, so she went to visit her cousin Lynn. If anyone could help it would be Lynn.

Danielle dropped over to Lynn’s to tell her the news.   
“What’s up Danielle, you look upset.” Lynn commented  
I started to talk but only tears would come out.   
“Oh Honey, what’s wrong? It can’t be that bad”  
“It is Lynn. It’s the worst thing I can think of. I just told Benedict that I can’t see him anymore. I told him I am recommitting to Julien.”  
“That sounds like a good thing. Why are you so sad?” she asked  
“Because I love Benedict!”  
“If you love him then why are you committing to Julien?”   
I told Lynn the whole story about how I was planning to leave Julien, about the picture of Ben and I and how Julien convinced me to give him another chance.  
“I don’t know Danielle, it seems like you aren’t too happy with your decision” Lynn said.  
“I’m not but I have the kids to think of. And being with Julien shouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. I mean he does love me and he made me happy once.” I said  
“But is that enough for you now? It obvious how much you love Benedict as I have never seen you this upset. You have to think about your need too.”  
“I know Lynn but TJ is still too young for me to break up his happy home. If he were a little older then it would be different. I can’t be that selfish, I can’t do that to him.” The tears were still streaming down my cheeks.  
“So how did Benedict take the news?” she asked.  
“As badly as I am. He really loves me Lynn. I know that with all my heart. It was killing me to have to do that to him. Wanda was right when she said someday I would end up hurting him”  
“I’m sure he doesn’t hold it against you. Does he?”  
“No he doesn’t but it would be easier if he did. If he hated me it would be easier for me to get over him. Even when I break his heart he was nice to me. Damn English manners!” We both chuckled at this a little bit.  
“Well Danielle all I can say is that I am here for you. I will help you anyway possible. And if in the end you decide you can’t make your marriage work, it wouldn’t be the end of the world.”  
“Thanks Lynn. I just needed to have someone to lean on. I knew I could count on you”

 

Danielle decided that as much as she missed Benedict, she needed to do everything she could to make her marriage work. She had to forget about him and make Julien her main focus. If she wasn’t going to give herself fully to Julien then she had broken Benedict’s heart for nothing.

So for the next several weeks, Julien and Danielle worked on their relationship. They would go on dates like they did in the beginning. Julien tried to be more romantic and would bring Danielle flowers from time to time to show he was thinking about her. In the morning he would give her a kiss before going to work and at night he would kiss her when he came home. He knew she needed time so he hadn’t tried to be intimate with her yet, he acted like they were in the early stages of a relationship. 

Danielle tried to forget the pain Julien had caused her and tried to find all the positives she could in him. She would respond to his kisses in a loving way and initiated some of her own. She couldn’t help but think that the spark wasn’t there in their kisses as there had been between her and Benedict, but she had to push that thought out of her mind. Benedict was her past and Julien was her future. She needed to be thankful for the time she had with Benedict instead of being miserable thinking about the fact she would never have that again. 

As the days wore on, they developed a more natural feel to their relationship. Danielle tried not to let Julien know how much she wished he was Ben. As long as she could keep her pain hidden, they were fine. They tried to spend less time talking about bills and the kids and more time talking about how they were feeling and what they wanted. They had dinners with friends and went for walks together, arm in arm. To the outside world everything was fine. Inside her heart Danielle was not healed. She still missed Benedict and felt the pain his absence caused. 

After a few weeks had passed, Julien felt it was time to consummate their new relationship. He wanted to erase every trace of Benedict from her mind and he knew to do this he had to get Benedict’s touch off of her body and replace it with his own. He wanted to possess her completely so she would be his again. He wanted to do everything right and didn’t want to push her into anything she wouldn’t want to do. So one morning he asked her how she was feeling about their relationship.

“Danielle,” he began, “We have been getting closer each day and I feel us getting back to the way things were before they went bad. Do you feel it too?”  
“Yes Julien, I feel things are getting better” I answered  
“Good. I was thinking perhaps it is time that we take a big step forward now”  
“What did you have in mind?” I had an idea but was hoping I was wrong.  
“I would like to make love to you Danielle and show you how much I care for you” There he said it. Now she couldn’t get out of it. “Are you ready for that?” he asked

I knew in my heart I wasn’t ready, but I also knew I had to fully commit to this relationship and maybe this would be the way to do it. So instead of saying what I really felt, I lied. “Yes Julien that would be nice” 

“Good” he said with a very happy smile spreading across his face. “Tonight I will come home early and bring us some nice takeout food and we can make a romantic evening of it.”

“Sounds nice” I said trying to sound cheerful. I was anything but cheerful as I thought about our upcoming night together. I tried to put on a brave face and thought about how I was going get through this. I was thinking lots of drinks might help.

 

That night, true to his word, Julien brought home my favorite takeout food, Chinese. He had even made arrangements for the kids to be out of the house for the night so we could be alone. I dressed up the table with nice linens and nice dishes so it would seem like we were dining in a nice restaurant. I poured Julien his favorite beer and had my favorite wine sitting on the table. 

We ate very quietly as we both were nervous and didn’t know what to say. We made small talk about our day to fill the silence. After we finished eating, I was clearing the dishes when Julien came up behind me and put his hands on my waist and leaned in to kiss me on my neck. “Why don’t you let me do that honey? You can go have a nice bubble bath” Julien knew what normally got me in the mood and he was pulling out all the stops tonight.

“That’s an offer I can’t refuse” I said as I went to pour my bath.  
As I soaked in the soft caress of the bubbles, I felt myself relax. The wine probably had a lot to do with it also. I almost dropped off to sleep it was so calming. I started to think of what was ahead with Julien. I could imagine him easing me out of my clothes, his strong hands, his long fingers, and his beautiful British accent. Wait! Suddenly, it wasn’t Julien caressing me, it was Benedict. I shook my head to try to get Benedict out of it. I was with Julien and not Ben and I had to remember that.

I got out of the tub and dressed in one of my nicest nightgowns. I dabbed some of Julien’s favorite scent on my neck. As I opened the bathroom door, I could see candlelight coming from the bedroom. As I walked in I found tons of small candles lit up the room. There were rose petals on the bed and Shakira was playing on my MP3- her songs always put me in the mood. I looked up to see Julien standing in the middle of the room in his bathrobe looking at me.

“So what do you think?” he looked like a little kid waiting for praise from his mother for doing something good.  
“It’s beautiful Julien, you have thought of everything”  
“You look so gorgeous” he said. “I don’t think I have ever seen you looking any better than you do right now”.  
“Thank you” I replied.  
Julien walked over to me, putting his hands on my cheeks and pressing his lips against mine. His lips were soft and moist but something was missing. I returned his kiss, trying to ignite the passion we would need for tonight.

He led me over to the bed, laying me across it. His lips once again found mine, then he moved his hand to my breasts and started to caress the nipples through the silk fabric.   
My nipples hardened in response as he continued to fondle me. I closed my eyes so I could concentrate on the sensation and not the person who was giving me it. As I was feeling Julien’s hands on me, I started thinking about Benedict. I thought about how his hands felt on my skin, how they set me on fire. Oh his hands felt so good as they possessed my body.

Julien thought things were going better than he expected. Danielle’s kisses were less than passionate but when he started to touch her body, she seemed to come alive. It had been a long time since he was able to make her moan like she was now. Perhaps his luck was changing.

As his hands continued to massage my body, I felt like we were back in London, in Benedict’s bed. I could see the Angel overtop of me as his hands found their way up my nightgown and caressed my moist mound. Benedict always knew what I liked. My God he was so good. I could feel him pressing the end of his cock at my entrance. He liked to tease. I thought I would let him know what I wanted.

“Give it to me Benedict. Don’t tease I want you inside me” I said.   
‘What?” I heard a voice that wasn’t Benedict’s and I popped open my eyes to see what was going on. I saw Julien staring at me in shock and disgust and I saw him holding himself about to enter me.  
“Get that away from me” I screamed. “Don’t touch me”  
Julien got off of me and looked at me in confusion. ‘What the hell Danielle! What is going on and why were you calling out HIS name?” he asked  
“Oh God Julien, I’m sorry.” I sobbed as I realized, it wasn’t Benedict but Julien who had been touching me. “I can’t, I just can’t” I cried.

“Nice Danielle. You lead me on and let me think you are enjoying my touch, that we are a real couple again, and all the time you were thinking about being with him!” he roared.  
“And then you won’t even let me touch you, WTF Danielle, WTF!

“I’m sorry Julien, but I’m not ready for you to touch me, I thought I was but clearly I’m not. “  
“Well darling if you ever want to be fucked again, you better let me in because I’m not ever going to let you near Lover boy again!” He was hollering now as he grabbed his robe and stormed out of the room.

I lie on the bed crying my heart out. It seemed so real, I was sure Benedict was here with me, touching me. It was so blissful, but when I realized it was Julien I couldn’t go any further. I didn’t want Julien’s hands on me, I only want Benedict’s! How did I let myself get into this situation!


	59. Drinking wasn’t Helping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tim has a chat with Benedict and starts to turn things around

As bad as Danielle had it with Julien, Benedict had it just as bad at home. Every newspaper and magazine in the world had gotten a hold of that picture and the press was hounding him for answers. “How long had he and Danielle been dating? What about her husband? “Were her kids secretly his?” It just went on and on.

Imagine trying to mend a broken heart and having the whole world remind you of what you had and lost. Benedict was beside himself with anguish. He tried to go on with his rehearsals for the movie he was currently making but it was no use. He ended up canceling all his work for 1 week telling everyone that he was sick. He didn’t leave his house and instead he stayed holed up in bed, drowning his sorrows in alcohol.

Ben’s parents were terribly worried. Tim and Wanda knew what Danielle meant to him. Wanda had been worried from the very start that she would end up breaking his heart—not because she was a bad person but because they were in a bad situation. They tried to see him but Ben told them he didn’t want any company. He was keeping everyone out.

Finally Tim took things into his own hands, went against Ben’s wishes, and let himself into his apartment with Ben’s spare key. He found his son in bed looking like he hadn’t showered for a week, reeking of alcohol. Tim had never seen him in such bad shape.

“Ben, what the hell happened to you?” he asked.  
“Oh Dad, I didn’t want anyone to see my like this. Mom’s not with you is she?”  
“No it’s just me. I thought it would be best if I came by myself.”  
“Thank you Dad.”  
“Now what happened? I’ve seen the picture of you and Danielle snogging in the airport, but you’ve dealt with issues like that before. What caused this?” he asked.

“When Danielle was here last she decided she couldn’t keep living a secret second life, but the good news was, she was choosing to be with me. She said she loved me more than anything and she couldn’t live her life without me. I was thrilled beyond belief Dad, as I love Danielle more than anyone I have ever loved. She is my soul mate, my confidant, the love of my life.”

“So how did you get from that to here?” Tim asked.

“Danielle went home to tell Julien she was leaving, but that’s when the picture came out. He had seen it before she got home and he confronted her with it as they were leaving the airport. It was a horrible situation she was facing as she tried to explain.”

“I can imagine. That poor girl, although I have to say she did bring it on herself. She knew she was playing with fire and when that happens someone always gets burnt” Tim commented.

“Dad, it took the two of us to make this happen. I knew what I was getting into and I thought I would be immune to her. The great Benedict Cumberbatch never falls in love and if he did, what woman would refuse him! My own ego led me here; Danielle cannot be the blame for my actions. Unfortunately, I underestimated the power of children and her commitment to her kids. When she told Julien she was leaving, he begged her to stay. He told her all the things he should have said years ago and told her he wanted them to be a family again. She felt guilty about what she was doing to the kids and felt she deserved to give Julien one last chance. 

It’s not Julien she went back to, it was her family. She wouldn’t put the kids through that as long as Julien was willing to give her what she needed to remain with him. If it wasn’t for her children I know she would be here with me now. And how can I fault her for putting her children first? If we had children together I would want her to do that for them.”

Tim could see the torment in his son’s eyes. He could feel the heartbreak he was dealing with. Wanda had been married to another man before Tim and although their marriage was long done before she met Tim; there is still that tie that always holds them together. In the back of his mind, he would always regret that he hadn’t been her first love.

Ben, I know you are miserable right now, but do you think hiding away in this house drinking is going to do you any good? Danielle would never want to return to you in this shape and you certainly won’t meet anyone else here. You need to clean yourself up and get back to work. You can’t think clearly in this condition. Get yourself back to as normal a life as you can and then you can decide where you go from here. And if you and Danielle are truly meant to be together, then it will happen. 

Benedict looked up at Tim and thought about what he had said. It’s true that Danielle would never want him this way. Danielle wanted a strong man in her life and this certainly wasn’t it. Could he go one without her long enough to win her back? He would. He would find a way to push on and then figure out what he was going to do to win her back. He knew in his heart they belonged together and he wasn’t going to give up.

“Thanks Dad. You know I think you are making some sense here. I really do need to get me act together as I wouldn’t want anyone to see me like this, certainly not Danielle.”

“Don’t count on seeing her Son, that’s not what I meant. I don’t want you getting your hopes up and then getting your heart broken a second time. I just meant she wouldn’t want you to carry on like this”

‘Don’t worry Dad. I will take care of things. Thank you so much for the pep talk as it really helped. Now if you don’t mind, I think I’m going to have a much needed shower and some coffee and then I’m going to check in with my assistant to see if I can salvage my career before it is too late.” Yes he thought, Danielle certainly won’t want an unemployed actor, he needed everything to be perfect for when he would get her back.


	60. Trying to Move on

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict comes up with a plan to get Danielle back while Julien and Danielle try to figure out what went wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made some revisions to chapter 58 so you might want to go back and reread that chapter before moving on to this one.

After his talk with his father Benedict realized he was going about this all wrong. The best way to get over his heartache was to figure out how to get Danielle back. He knew it would only be a matter of time before Julien messed things up and she realized she belonged with Benedict instead. He just needed to put a plan together on how he was going to expedite this.

The first thing was he had to get himself back in shape and working. He would leave Danielle alone for a few weeks in order for it to look like he was respecting her wishes and not interfering. He would use this time to commit to his work and to work on his physique. He needed to train for a potential project anyway so the two reasons worked hand in hand. 

Every morning he headed to the gym to pump iron for several hours before heading to the studio. Every night he would go for a jog or a swim. Swimming always helped him to add muscle when he needed it. 

Once he settled into his new routine, things got better for him. He got his confidence back because he knew he was going to get Danielle back. It was just a matter of time and he would use his time wisely until she was back with him.

 

On the other side of the Atlantic things were less than prefect. After Julien’s failed attempt to consummate his marriage, he was full of anger at Danielle- how could she do that to him? How could she call him another man’s name while he was pleasuring her? He was full of anger at Benedict- how dare he sleep with his wife? Doesn’t he have enough women throwing themselves at him that he doesn’t need my wife? And lastly he was full of anger at himself- how could he have let things get this bad? She had told him what she needed and he chose to disregard her needs. How could he have been so thoughtless?

Julien was mostly afraid. He was afraid that things had gone too far and that he would not be able to bring Danielle back to him. She was the love of his life, but he had forgotten to show her that and she had found someone else who could. If he was being honest with himself, he was to blame. Now he just wanted to fix things if he could.

Danielle was in shock when Julien stormed out of the bedroom. She couldn’t believe she had just done that. It was so real to her, she was sure Benedict was there and making her happy. Now that she realized she was wrong, she broke down in tears. She thought she could commit to Julien but she just couldn’t. Benedict was the only man she wanted and she couldn’t have him, not if she was going to make her marriage work. 

Maybe I just need more time. I could still feel Benedict’s touch on my body so of course it was too soon to try to reconnect with Julien. I need to wait longer so I can push Benedict out of my mind. That’s all it is. I will apologize to Julien and explain my thinking and I know he will understand. We can make this work.


	61. Benedict Returns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict decides he needs to get Dnaielle back but first he needs an ally.

After a couple of months of the torture of bring away from Danielle, Benedict thought it was time to go after her. He had gotten firmly back into his acting and was getting rave reviews. He was getting more job offers then he could possibly handle. Now that his career was good again, it was time to take a hold of his personal life. Julien would have had enough time by now to show his true colors and let Danielle down yet again. She would be ready to have Benedict back in her life. She would be able to see the mistake she had made.

So without telling her, he booked a flight to Canada. He knew the element of surprise would work in his favor but he also thought he needed an ally to help him out. The only person he knew that Danielle had told about their relationship was Danielle’s cousin Lynn. So when he arrived he checked into his hotel room and he immediately looked her up. 

Lynn’s phone rang and as she went to pick it up she noticed it was a number she didn’t recognize. It was a local number but not one she knew. She answered it cautiously wondering who would be calling. 

“Hello Lynn” said a strong male voice with a British accent. ‘It’s Benedict Cumberbatch a friend of Danielle’s. I don’t know if you remember me”  
“Of course I remember you, Benedict. How are you?”   
“I’m good. I’m actually in town as a surprise to Danielle. I was hoping I could come see you before I see her. Am I able to come see you this afternoon?”  
“Sure Benedict, anytime. I am here all afternoon. I’m at 22 Maple St. White house with a blue door. I’ll put a pot of tea on for you”  
“Thanks Lynn. I appreciate it!”  
Lynn wasn’t sure what was going on but she knew it would be trouble as Benedict and Julien in the same city couldn’t be good right now!

A short 30mins later Benedict was at Lynn’s door.   
“Welcome Benedict, it’s so nice to see you again.”  
“You too Lynn. Thank you for letting me disturb your afternoon.”  
“No disruption at all I enjoy the company.”

Lynn got him a cup of tea and they settled in the living room. While Lynn had no idea why Benedict was here, she could tell from the look on his face that he was bothered by something.

“So Benedict, what’s on your mind? You certainly have my curiosity peaked.”  
“How much has Danielle told you about my relationship with her” he asked  
“Pretty much everything. She told me how she was planning to leave Julien but that she needed to make things work for the kids. She also told me how much she loves you and how she hated having to break your heart.”  
She could see Benedict’s eyes tearing up at the thought of that conversation and what Lynn had said.  
“Well she was right about one thing, it did absolutely break my heart. I love her more than anything else. I have tried to move on with my life but I can’t get her out of my mind or my heart and I think she feels the same about me.”  
“She may Benedict, but she was pretty determined when I talked to her that she wanted to make her marriage work.”  
“That’s only because he is here with her and I am so far away. I have to make one more attempt to get her back. I can’t live without her Lynn”  
“God now you are breaking my heart!” she said.  
“Will you help me? Will you find a way to help me get her alone so I can talk to her?” he asked.  
“Only on one condition Benedict.”  
“What?”  
“If she refuses you again, this will be the last time you will try to contact her. You will leave and never bother her again. Can you promise me that?” Lynn asked.  
“If you help me get one more chance with Danielle and it doesn’t work, you will have my word that I will back off and leave her alone.” Benedict replied.  
“Alright then I will help you. But, mark my words, if you don’t do as you have promised I will be on the horn to the newspapers faster than you can say Sherlock!”  
“Agreed. So let’s see what we can do”


	62. One More Try

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict tries one more time to get Danielle to see that she needs to be with him and not Julien

True to her word, Lynn helped Benedict in his plan to try to win Danielle back. She asked Danielle to meet her at one of the hotels downtown as she was looking to see about having a kids’ birthday party there. She told Danielle she wanted her to come look at it with her. I did think it a little bit odd but Lynn was always doing all kinds of odd things so for Lynn this was normal.

Lynn had told me to meet her upstairs at room 310 at 7pm. As I approached the hotel I quickly remembered when I had been there last. I had been here with Benedict when he and his parents visited. I can’t think about being here with Benedict as that will drive me crazy. I need to keep my mind on the task at hand.

As I stepped off the elevator, I had a strange twinge in my stomach as if something was wrong. I shouldn’t be so silly, it’s only Lynn. Lynn was waiting outside the elevator door me.

“Hi Danielle, thank you for coming with me”  
“No problem. I love doing all this crazy stuff with you”  
“That’s good. Okay it’s right here. Let me open the door”  
We stepped inside what appeared to be a normal hotel suite. I walked over to the windows to look outside.   
As I was looking out the window Lynn said “Please don’t be mad at me but I thought this was the best thing for both of you”  
As I turned around to ask her what she was talking about, there was Benedict standing in the doorway of the suite!  
“What are you doing here?!” I said in total shock. “Lynn what did you do?”  
“All she did was get you here so I could talk to you” he said. “The rest was all my doing”  
“Well you have come a long way for nothing then!” I was so mad that they tricked me like this. Also I knew I couldn’t be anywhere near him. 

“Look Danielle I only need a few minutes of your time. I made a promise to Lynn that after we talked, I would never bother you again if that’s what you want.”  
“He did Danielle. And I told him if he broke that promise that I would ruin his career with the press so I think it’s safe to believe that he will stick to his word” she said  
“I’ll give you 20 minutes and no more. And you better be a gentleman” I said.  
“’I’ll leave you two alone then.” Lynn said as she left the room.

“Danielle, I have missed you so much” he began as he moved towards me to give me a hug”  
“Benedict, no I can’t have you touching me”

“Because you still have feelings for me, don’t you?”

“Of course I do. It has only been a couple of months; I couldn’t forget you that quickly.”

“You could if you really were in love with your husband. You would if you knew we were a mistake. I think you know that Julien is no longer the person you love and you know we were anything but a mistake.”

“Benedict, I told you before it doesn’t matter. I have no choice”

‘Yes you do Danielle. You can choose to be happy; you can choose to be with me. Your children won’t be happy in a family where there is no love. I’m sure they know something is going on, especially Alex. She is old enough to figure it out.”

“She did see me crying after I spoke to you and she asked a lot of questions. I told her some of it but not all”

“And was she upset or did she understand?” he asked

“She understood. She could tell I wasn’t as happy being at home without you.”

“See, I’m sure TJ feels it too he’s just too young to know what’s happening.”

“Tell me Danielle, how has it been being back with Julien? Has he made you happy?”

“He’s trying. He’s being more considerate and more loving”

“But have you developed feelings for him again?”

“Some”

“Be honest Danielle. I bet you havent even slept together since coming back.”

“That’s none of your business.”

“I hit a nerve didn’t I? That means you havent. What happened? Can’t get the feel of my hands off of your skin?” As he said this he moved closer to me and put his hand on my cheek, rubbing his thumb gently across my face.

“Benedict, please don’t” 

“I can tell you missed me too. I can tell the way your body is reacting to me, that you still want me” he said as he slipped his other hand behind my back. I wanted to move out of his grasp but I couldn’t seem to get myself to move.

“Benedict…please…” my protests were getting weaker and weaker.”

“I’ll stop if you really want me too, but you have to tell me you want me to” He looked me into the eyes with the look that melts my heart and warms my pants. 

“Ben…” I couldn’t get his whole name out as he put his lips on mine. Oh how I missed those lips. As much as I knew I shouldn’t, I couldn’t help but return his passion. He was right, I wanted him so badly.

His kisses got more demanding, his tongue finding mine. I kissed him like I was suffocating and he was oxygen. We didn’t need to say anymore words; our bodies did all the talking for us. We couldn’t seem to get enough of each other. Our hands were grabbing at each other’s clothes; our mouths were devouring each other’s face, neck and beyond. 

Once all clothes were off, we settled down on the bed. Benedict’s mouth found my breasts and my hands found his hardened length. He felt so good that I was instantly lost in the passion. My mind turned off and Julien and the kids were no longer a thought.  
His hands fondled my clit and his fingers found their way inside of me. I was dripping wet in seconds. My body never responded to Julien’s touch this way. 

He was as hard as a rock with very little encouragement from me. He wanted me as badly as I wanted him. “Do you want me Danielle?” he asked.

“Oh yes Benedict I want you so badly, I want you inside me now!” I groaned

In an instant he filled me completely. No man could ever reach the spots he could. I relished the sensation for a moment and then he began thrusting in and out of me, making me cry out in delight.  
“Oh God Benedict, oh God!” 

“That’s it Danielle, tell me how good it is, tell me how happy I make you”

“It’s so good. You are so good! Ben I love you!” I screamed as his last thrust opened me up and released my orgasm. 

“I love you too Danielle” he cried as I could feel him explode within me.  
He laid his head down on my chest as we tried to regain our breath. 

Once he was able to breathe, Benedict looked up at me with those beautiful green blue eyes. “I love you so much it hurts” he said

“I love you too Benedict. I tried not to, I didn’t want to, but I had no choice. You are everything to me. Julien has tried his best to be a good husband but it’s not the same. I don’t have the same feelings for him as I do for you and it’s not just lust. When I’m with you, we could talk for hours and never get bored. When I’m with Julien, we can’t seem to find anything to talk about other than the kids.” 

“I know what you mean Luv. After you called me, I wanted to curl up and die. I didn’t want to go on without you. Sure I could have other women, but they would not be you. I have never met anyone who I felt was my equal in every way. You understand all my quirks, and how to get around them. You make me laugh, even when I don’t want to. When I am with you I feel like the world is at peace.”

“Oh Benedict, I’m so sorry I put you through all this, not to mention what I have done to Julien by keeping him hanging on like this. I did something truly awful to him.”

“It can’t be that bad darling, what was it?” he asked.

“You asked me earlier if I had slept with him. The truth is that we almost did. Julien wanted us to be a real couple and planned a very romantic evening; he even asked my permission before doing so to ensure he was not rushing me into anything I wasn’t ready for. I thought I was ready, I thought I could do it. But when things started heating up something came over me I closed my eyes and I thought I was with you. He was putting his hands on my body trying to satisfy me, and I shouted out your name! When I opened my eyes and realized it wasn’t you, I stopped him as I couldn’t let him touch me anymore. I didn’t want him anywhere near me.”

“Oh no, the poor boy. As much as I’m glad you didn’t sleep with him, I do feel bad for the chap. No man should be put through that.” He said.

“I agree and I think that’s what I’m just realizing is that I’m not doing anyone any good by staying with someone I don’t love. Julien deserves better; he deserves someone who will love him the way I love you. And the kids deserve to have a happy mom and dad. Sometimes they have to be apart to be happy”

“So what now Luv?”  
“I’ll tell Julien tonight when I get home. Bur first, I think I need another proper shagging to make up for lost time” I grinned.  
“Do you now? Your wish is my command darling” he said as he drove under the blankets.


	63. Resolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle and Julien finally come to a decision

I left Benedict at 930 and headed home. I kept rehearsing in my mind what I was going to say to Julien. This time I wasn’t going to change my mind. I knew what I needed to do. My happiness was as important as everyone else’s.

When I walked in the door, Julien was sitting waiting for me. He didn’t have an angry look about him; instead he looked kind of sad.

“Hi, were you waiting for me?” I asked.   
‘Yes, I thought we should talk when you got home” he answered.  
“Where are the kids?”   
“Your parents came and got them for a sleepover”  
“Oh I see”  
“Did you have a nice evening?” he asked  
“Yes I did”  
“Before you try to think of a good lie for me, don’t bother. I know you weren’t with Lynn.”  
“Why do you say that?’ I asked  
“Because I called her house and I guess she didn’t let her hubby in on the secret because he told me she was there and had been there since 730. So what were you doing for 2 hours?” he asked  
“Well I was planning to talk to you when I got home as well and there won’t be any lying”  
“Ok” he said, “You first”

“Julien, I don’t know how to say this gently so I am just going to say it, I’m still in love with Benedict”  
“After the way you reacted the other night that doesn’t really surprise me to hear you say that.”  
“I was with him tonight. He flew here to see me, to try to win me back. He still loves me very much. I can’t fight it anymore Julien, my heart is with him. I tried to make things work when you asked me for another chance. I really wanted it to work, but I couldn’t forget my love for him”.

“I think we fooled ourselves 18 years ago, into thinking we were exactly the perfect people for each other but in reality I think we were just the only good people either of us had been with. We were both kind, considerate and we did have similar outlooks on life, but we were also such very different people. I think in the early days that I tried to hide who I really was so I would be a better partner for you or perhaps I really didn’t know what I wanted- either of these could be true. Either way, I know now that we really weren’t the perfect match. Haven’t we hurt ourselves enough trying to be what we are not? Wouldn’t you like to find someone who truly makes you happy instead of trying to live with me?

This was lot for me to get off my chest but this time, the tears didn’t come as they normally would. I knew this was the right thing and it didn’t make me sad or overwhelm me.

“Danielle, when I first started to sense things had changed between us, I was very mad at you. I thought we had a great life and I was upset that you wanted to change things. I thought you were being selfish for wanting more, especially since I didn’t seem to be the one who could give it to you. When one partner cheats on another, it’s so easy to put the blame on the person who cheated, but I see now that I was as much to blame as you were”

“You are right, I wasn’t giving you what you needed and if I am honest, I really didn’t want to. And now that you say that, I think maybe you are right about how we fooled ourselves when we were younger. I was afraid even back then that I couldn’t give you what you needed but I figured that I was lucky to have you so I should try. Now I see that it wasn’t a matter of me not being good enough for you, instead it was just that we weren’t the right match.”

“So Danielle, as much as my pride has been hurting over you finding Benedict, I am finally ready to let you go.”

A giant sigh came out of my mouth as I rushed over to hug him. “Are you sure?” I asked  
‘Yes dear I am sure. I think it’s time for me to find someone who is my equal”

“I agree. You are a good man and I want to see you be happy too. I have been trying to push Benedict away because of the children also. I didn’t want them to grow up in a broken home”  
“I feel the same way, but as long as we are civil, we can make this work. Alex is old enough it shouldn’t be too hard for her and well TJ will go with whatever we tell him, as long as we let him know it’s a good idea and we continue to give them everything they need.”

“Oh Julien, you have made me so happy. Would it be alright if I ask Benedict to come over tomorrow so the three of us can talk? Since the kids won’t be here it will be a chance for us to start planning. Or is that too soon for you?” I wanted to be considerate of his feelings. I know I had made up my mind a while ago but he has just figured this out and I don’t want to rush him.

“Tomorrow would be fine. No need to prolong things any more than necessary” he said,  
“Great. Julien I know this hasn’t been easy on you and I really respect you for making this tough decision. I think it’s the best thing for all four of us. And I will always have a special place in my heart for you. While we may not have been perfect for each other, I really feel honored that I could call you my husband for so many years.”

“Thank you Danielle. I feel the same about you and I’m sorry that I put you through what I did, before I was finally able to see the truth.”  
“No apology necessary dear. We were both doing what we felt was right”


	64. Putting it All Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is this the happy ending Danielle was looking for?

As soon as Julien and I were done talking, I went to the phone planning to call Benedict. I was so incredibly happy that I couldn’t wait to tell him. I changed my mind since the kids weren’t here. I told Julien that I was going to tell Benedict in person.

As short while later I was knocking on his hotel door. A very sleepy Benedict answered; it was 4 hours later in his time zone so he had crashed from exhaustion.

“Hello Luv,” he managed to get out. “Not that I mind, but what brings you back so soon?”  
“You, lover boy!” I said as I put my arms around his neck and kissed him passionately on the mouth

“Wow, what’s up?”  
“I’m here to tell you that you have no choice now.”  
“What do you mean?” he asked  
“You can’t get rid of me now, Julien and I have agreed to get a divorce! He is not contesting our relationship anymore. We can finally be together!”  
“I know I am sleepy so please repeat what you just said so I know I got it right!”  
“I said, I told Julien I loved you and wanted to be with you and he said Okay! He understands now that we aren’t made for each other and he wants us both to be happy!”

Benedict grabbed me by the waist and twirled me around in the air, happily screaming as he did! “Oh Danielle, this is the best news I have ever heard. My luv I am so overwhelmed I don’t know what to say!”

“Then don’t say anything, just kiss me!” I said.  
“With pleasure!” he said as his lips touched mine again and again and again.

We spent the rest of the night in each other’s arms, celebrating over and over again the fact that we could now be together. The next day, we went back to my house to sit and talk with Julien about how we could make this whole thing work. There was no longer any animosity between the two of them. There was no disdain between Julien and me. We were able to figure out a plan on what to do with the kids

 

When the kids came home Julien and I talked to them first. We let them know how important they were to both of us and how we loved them more than anything else. We then told them how sometimes decisions grown ups make when they are younger turn out not to be the best decisions for them when they get older. We told them how we still loved each other but that we realize now that we aren’t the best people to be married. 

Alex understood somewhat but to TJ it didn’t make much sense. So we told him how Mommy and Daddy would not be living together anymore but we would still be a family. I asked TJ if he liked Benedict to which he answered yes very quickly. I told him Ben and Mommy had become very good friends and that Mommy cared for him very much. I said that I was going to live with Benedict and sometimes he and Alex would stay with Ben as well. He seemed to be okay with that.

Alex took me aside and wanted to ask me some questions. “Mom do you really want this and is Dad really okay with this?”  
“Yes dear I do and your Dad understands now that it is the best thing for all of us. I didn’t go looking to fall in love with Ben but it happened. Your Dad and I have not been happy for a long time but now I am happy with Ben and this way your Dad can find someone who makes him happier then I could”  
“Well I am nervous about what this will mean for us but I do like Benedict and I see how happy he makes you. I guess this would not be the worst thing in the world. Besides how cool would it be to tell my friends my Mom is Benedict Cumberbatch’s girlfriend?”

Just then Benedict joined us and he heard with Alex had said. “There are some perks to my celebrity darling but it can be a stressful life at times. I will however make sure to keep you and your brother out of the eyes of the public as much as possible, I promise”

He went to TJ and Alex and told them that he was very happy to have them in his life. He thought they were great kids and he hoped they would be okay with him being part of their family.

TJ spoke first “Ben I like you and spending time with you is fun. Does this mean we get to go back to London again?” he asked

“Yes TJ you will get to spend lots of time in London. Wanda and Tim will be very happy to see you too” 

“Oh yay. I would love to see them again” TJ said.  
“Alex what about you?” Ben asked  
“Yes Ben I like you too and you make my Mom very happy so that means we are happy too” she said.

“So Alex and TJ you will stay here with Dad and Mrs Fields for now until school ends and then you will join Benedict and me in London.”

After that we talked about how to tell our family and friends. As soon as everyone heard they were sad about Julien and me but happy for Benedict and me. No one could dislike Benedict.

The next several weeks went quickly and we started to move ahead with our lives. Benedict and I were never happier and the kids seemed good too. Even Julien was happier as the pressure was off of him to try to be something he wasn’t. A weight was taken off of his shoulders. 

Benedict and I were at the airport ready to head back to London. The kids and Julien were seeing us off. As we were heading out the gate, I took one look at the newspaper headlines and smiled:

Benedict Cumberbatch’s new family! The Inside Story of how a Housewife Won the Affections of the World’s Most Eligible Bachelor!

Yep that was us alright. It looked at Benedict and smiled as our new life had just begun!

 

Epilogue

 

As she typed the last word of the chapter, a smile broke out on Lily’s face. It had finally sunk in to her that she had just finished writing her first novel. For 8 months she had shared in the lives of her characters, Benedict and Danielle and their families, and now the story was complete. It was a happy time but a sad time as well as they had become part of her life. 

Now the hard part begins. Could she really have something someone would want to publish? Could she really become and author? It was now time for her to find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's it for Danielle and Benedict but is there something ahead for Lily? Let me know if you would like to see Lily's story continue as part 2 of the One plus One Collection.  
> I really loved writing these characters and hope you enjoyed reading them. Any constructive criticism is appreciated.


End file.
